Haydel Memorial Hospice

04/30/2026

Such a great read! Please enjoy on this Thursday!

When someone you love dies, your life changes in a million different ways. Everything you planned to do won’t happen, and the you that you were with them, will change so much you won’t know who you are or what to do next. Death, and grief, feel much like identity theft… stealing the person you were, leaving you feeling completely helpless, not knowing who you will be or how you will get there.

I lost both of my parents before I turned thirty. I was too young then to understand the gravity of this loss. When I hear other people talk about their recent loss of a parent, I hear them use words like “orphan,” which is not something I felt, because at that time I was not close with either parent. I did not start feeling the power of this loss, or the deep impact it would have on me until I was older, got married, became a mother, and then a grandmother. They missed out on all of that, and so did I. I stopped being a daughter so long ago, I never really identified as that through the rest of my life without them.
I feel robbed.

My son lost his father when he was just hitting his twenties and never really had a chance to build a relationship with him, one that would allow his father's unique gifts to help mold him into the man he would become. He didn’t have his dad at his wedding or for the birth of his daughters. We never had the chance to look at one another and share pride in the man we brought into this world and raised. His dad would be so proud of him, and I wish so badly he did not miss out on any of that. I feel robbed, for myself and for my son.

I have lost two siblings, not truly realizing, or appreciating them for the gift they were in my life until they were gone. Their deaths, seven years apart from one another, left me feeling the heavy weight of guilt and regret for not saying “the things” as often as I could have, or should have, when they were alive. Not making our time together more meaningful, wasting less time by always assuming we would have more. I wish so badly we had more time together, could make more memories, and could watch our children grow up.
I feel robbed.

I know many people who have lost their partners way too soon, now facing the reality of their life plans being taken from them, staying stuck in limbo, uncertain of what to do next. Picking up all the pieces of their new life off the ground, struggling with how each piece will fit in their “new” life, worried they might not put them back in the order they are supposed to go in. Not even knowing what order that should be.

To me, death and grief feels like looking in the mirror, no longer knowing the person you see, feeling like someone stole your identity.

xo
Gabby

You can find this blog here:
https://www.thehospiceheart.net/post/identity-theft

04/28/2026

An honor it is!

04/22/2026

Haydel Memorial Hospice would like to wish a very happy Administrative Professionals' Day to our amazing office manager, Shari! Thank you for keeping things on track and running smoothly!

04/19/2026

Wow!! Such a raw conversation about grief.

04/15/2026

We thought we would share our testimonial page so you can get a better understanding of the work we do! Check out Tim's testimonial video too!
https://haydelhospice.com/testimonials/

04/10/2026

At Haydel Memorial Hospice, we believe that every life deserves to be honored with compassion, comfort, and dignity—especially at the end of life.

“Death with dignity” means more than medical care. It means listening to each patient’s wishes, managing pain with care, and surrounding them with respect, love, and support. It’s about helping individuals live their final days on their own terms, with peace and meaning, while also supporting the families who walk alongside them.

Hospice care is not about giving up—it’s about choosing comfort, presence, and quality of life when it matters most.

We are honored to walk this journey with our patients and their loved ones, ensuring that no one faces the end of life alone.

04/09/2026

Good advice and ideas here!

I am often asked what the best gift would be to bring someone who is dying or someone who is grieving. Our first go-to is usually flowers, and while I do believe they are beautiful, sometimes those are not the most appropriate gift, and my reason is this… for someone who is dying the flowers could have a strong smell that can be difficult to tolerate. They also wilt and die and leave messes, which is hard to look at day after day if not cleaned up quickly.

And for grievers, while flowers are beautiful, they can be a bit overwhelming if everybody sends them, and they usually always end up being a chore… having to find a place for them, to tend to them, and to clean them up.

While it might be a bit cliché, your presence, or the reminder of your presence with a handwritten note is a gift that keeps on giving. Cards and letters offer love and feelings, with the unsaid words telling you to take your time to read it. They don't require someone to stop immediately and look at it, but instead offer permission to open it when they are ready.

A text message or email can let someone know that you are there, and you are thinking about them. You can add to the message, "no need to respond, just know I am thinking of you," so they don't feel obligated to respond right away. You can also send it to someone close to them, asking that they read it to them when the time is right.

If they have a garden, and the space for a potted plant, I think a rosebush is always a lovely gift. But be mindful of the size; if it's too small, and not planted in good soil, it too will become a chore, which might be a little difficult early on.

One of the things that I like to gift, is a heart shaped stone. This can be placed on a table, a shelf, in a small bowl, or in their pocket close to them, which is especially good for grievers because they can hold it and feel the love from the person who gave it.

The gift of your kindness, your compassion, and the reminder that you are there and available to them, if needed, is the most beautiful gift of all. That is the gift that stays in the heart of someone who is dying, and someone who is grieving.

xo
Gabby

You can find this blog here:
https://www.thehospiceheart.net/post/what-gift-can-you-give-to-someone-who-is-dying-or-grieving

04/05/2026

04/02/2026

So beautifully written.

Today I received a call that someone I had been supporting and walking alongside on her end-of-life journey has died.

I spoke with her days ago. She told me she could feel herself fading. She knew it was getting closer. I offered to come, and she gently said she would be okay, that she would let me know when to come.

She died a few days after that.

In the work I do, I understand that I may not be there at the last breath. I prepare for that. I offer support in a way that makes sure both the people who are dying, as well as those who love them. have what they need, whether I am present in that final moment or not. And I have made peace with that.

But today reminded me of something I often tell others: no matter how prepared you think you are, when the last breath comes… it can still feel like the wind has been knocked out of you.

There is a shock to it. A quiet, breathless kind of grief.

She wasn’t my family, and maybe not a friend in the traditional sense, but we shared something real. For over a year, I had the honor of supporting her, of witnessing her life, of holding space for both the hard and the beautiful moments. And that matters. That counts. That is a relationship. And so this is a loss.

Grief doesn’t ask for titles or definitions. It simply arrives.
Today I will light a candle for her, I will say her name out loud, and I will cry.

I will honor the sacredness of her life, and the sacredness of her dying. I will hold close the comfort of knowing she was not alone, and that she was surrounded by love at the end.

And I will also honor this truth: that to walk alongside others in this way is a profound privilege… and it comes with a tender, ongoing grief of its own.

For anyone who has ever stood near the end of a life, whether as family, friend, or quiet witness, this grief belongs to you too.
And it matters.

xo
Gabby
www.thehospiceheart.net

03/25/2026

The Gift of Hospice

When time grows quiet, soft, and slow,
And we must face what we don’t know,
Hospice arrives with gentle grace,
Bringing comfort to that space.

Not there to cure or turn away,
But walk with us through each hard day,
With caring hands and hearts so true,
And time to simply be with you.

They ease the pain, they calm the fear,
They remind us love is always near,
And in those moments, deep and true,
We see what love can really do.