Inner Healing Trauma Coach

12/14/2025

LET HOLY SPIRIT REVEAL UNHEALED TRAUMA

It’s important to allow the Holy Spirit to show us where we have trauma, because what remains unseen often continues to influence our reactions, relationships, and choices.

Holy Spirit knows where pain was stored before we had language for it, where wounds were buried for survival, and where coping mechanisms replaced wholeness.

The Spirit doesn’t expose trauma to shame us, but to heal us—gently uncovering what was formed in moments of pain so it no longer governs our present.
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PREVENTATIVE VS REDEMPTIVE

There is a profound difference between wanting God to be primarily preventative and recognizing that He is often intentionally redemptive.

Many believers pray for God to prevent hardship—prevent pain, prevent loss, prevent conflict, prevent failure. And while God certainly can and sometimes does prevent things, Scripture consistently reveals that His deeper work is not the absence of trouble, but His presence and purpose within it. A preventative God keeps us from suffering.
A redemptive God meets us in suffering and transforms it.

If God prevented every difficulty, He would also prevent:
• the refining of character
• the deepening of faith
• the exposure of idols
• the formation of endurance, humility, and wisdom
• the intimacy that comes from dependence on Him

Redemption assumes something has gone wrong—and instead of removing it immediately, God enters it, works through it, and reclaims it for good.

Believers often ask, “Why didn’t God stop this?”

But heaven may be asking, “What if God is revealing Himself in this?”

The cross itself is the clearest proof:
God did not prevent suffering—He redeemed it. He did not remove the pain—He resurrected purpose from it.

So when God doesn’t prevent your problem, He is not absent from your situation but rather He is present with you in it to redeem it, heal you from it, deliver you through it or out of it, strengthen you, encourage you, comfort you, console you threw it and empower you to overcome it.

This beautiful, seemingly unfair process produces dependence, faith, and character in us.

Not everything is meant to be avoided.
Some things are meant to be redeemed.

12/14/2025

🌟 —COPING MECHANISMS: override the voice of the Holy Spirit 🕊

This is where believers grow dull in their discernment, spiritual sensitivity, & ability to receive guidance, clarity, direction.

12/14/2025

🌟— Coping mechanisms distract us from: ️AUTHENTIC EMOTIONAL AWARENESS
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👇 COMMON COPING MECHANISM 👇

Hyper-independence — refusing help; self-reliance as protection

Spiritualizing — using faith language to avoid emotional processing

People-pleasing — prioritizing others’ approval to feel safe

Control — managing outcomes to reduce anxiety or uncertainty

Humor — deflecting pain or vulnerability with jokes

Dissociation — mentally or emotionally checking out to survive overwhelm

Perfectionism — striving for flawlessness to prevent criticism or rejection

Avoidance — delaying or escaping discomfort, conflict, or truth

Over-functioning — doing more than your share to feel needed or secure

12/10/2025

12/10/2025

Staying hungry for truth is important because it drives continuous growth, learning, and understanding!

BENEFITS OF TRUTH:

1. Personal Growth: A desire for truth pushes you to question assumptions and beliefs, helping you grow intellectually and emotionally. It fosters critical thinking and the ability to see the world more clearly.

2. Integrity and Authenticity: Living in truth promotes integrity, meaning your actions align with your values and beliefs. This leads to an authentic life, where you no longer feel the need to pretend or hide parts of yourself, allowing both your spirit and relationships to flourish.

3. Progress and Innovation: Societal and scientific progress often depend on a relentless pursuit of truth. It motivates exploration, research, and innovation in all fields, leading to breakthroughs that can improve life.

4. Resilience: A commitment to truth, even when it's uncomfortable, builds resilience. Facing difficult realities instead of avoiding them helps develop strength and adaptability.

5. Mental Clarity: Truth clears confusion and removes false beliefs that cloud judgment. When you understand reality as it is, rather than through the lens of misconceptions, your mind becomes free from mental traps, anxiety, and fear.

6. Emotional Liberation: Accepting truth, even when it's difficult, frees the heart from emotional burdens such as guilt, shame, or denial. It allows you to process feelings in a healthy way, leading to emotional release and healing.

7. Spiritual Alignment: Truth aligns the spirit with higher principles, such as honesty, integrity, and authenticity. This alignment fosters inner peace and a sense of connection to something greater, liberating the soul from superficial or material distractions.

8. Empowerment: Knowing and accepting the truth gives you the power to make informed decisions and take control of your life. It frees you from external manipulation, allowing you to act with agency and autonomy.

9. Freedom from Fear: Fear often arises from the unknown or from illusions. By confronting and embracing the truth, you dissolve fear, because you're no longer running from reality or dreading potential outcomes that may not even exist.

11/08/2025

Feedback is essential for every one of us.

We simply cannot grow and build meaningful connections if we don’t hear about how the people around us are experiencing us. Feedback gives us the information we need to take responsibility for how we are affecting our environment and adjust in order to protect what is important to us.

Though many of us associate “feedback” with “criticism,” feedback can also be positive. In fact, positive feedback is the kind we need to be both giving and receiving most in our lives. Keeping up a continuous flow of encouragement and affirmation is critical to creating a safe place where we feel safe to be ourselves, be vulnerable, and build trust with one another. Without this safe place of trust, it’s really difficult to deliver effective feedback when we need to confront a problem.

“Confrontation” is another word that has a negative connotation for many of us, but confrontation done well brings strength to a relationship. The goal in confrontation is not to punish someone who is making a mess, but to empower them to clean up the mess and repair relational disconnection.

So what are some keys to effective communication in confrontation?

First, approach the other person with a spirit of humility and gentleness. Galatians 6:1 says, "Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted."

Second, ask great questions. Questions stimulate thinking and allow the person being confronted to find solutions from the inside. They give them the opportunity to tap into their greatness and remember that they are powerful. Here are questions I often use in confrontation:

I AM WONDERING IF…
WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?
HOW IS THIS WORKING FOR YOU?
DO YOU WANT ANY HELP WITH THIS?


Giving and receiving feedback is one of the most powerful ways we can love one another and fight for our connections. So I challenge you today with this: Are you allowing others into your life to give you feedback and are you giving feedback to others? Open your heart to it today and you will see a massive difference!

-Danny Silk-

11/07/2025

—Refined Self vs Reactive Self—

The Reactive Self is the version of us that responds from old wounds, fear, pride, or emotional immaturity. It reacts instinctively instead of intentionally. It’s the “fight, flight, freeze, or fawn” version of us — driven by defense rather than discernment.

The Refined Self, on the other hand, is formed through awareness, surrender, and maturity.
It responds, not reacts. It filters emotion through wisdom. It knows how to pause, reflect, and choose peace without passivity and truth without hostility.
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🌟 Reaction is Immediate — Refinement is Intentional

A reactive person moves from emotion to action.

A refined person moves from emotion → reflection → alignment → action.

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✨️ Reactivity Protects the Ego — Refinement Protects the Soul

The reactive self defends the image.

The refined self preserves integrity.

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🌟️ Reactivity Blames — Refinement Takes Responsibility

The reactive self says, “You made me angry.”

The refined self says, “Something in me got triggered; I need to understand why.”

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✨️ Refinement Requires Painful Awareness

Refinement is not comfort—it’s conscious growth.

God often refines us in the very situations that used to trigger us, to show that we’ve changed.
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🌟 Reactivity is Loud — Refinement is Quiet Strength

The reactive self seeks to be heard; the refined self seeks to understand.

Power is not in volume—it’s in composure.

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✨️ Reactivity Reinforces Old Patterns — Refinement Creates New Pathways

Every time you respond differently than your old self would have, you literally rewire your brain and spirit for maturity.

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“Your reaction reveals what still needs healing; your response reveals what’s been refined.”

“Refinement is the art of mastering pause.”

“Not every emotion deserves a microphone.”

“Stillness is strength disguised as silence.”

“Reactivity is the impulse of the wounded; refinement is the discipline of the wise.”

“A refined self doesn’t suppress feelings—it stewards them.”

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Video Credit:
https://www.instagram.com/conflictish?igsh=aGhodjVsZmxkZmcz

11/04/2025

"If you love someone, and they love you, a hard conversation should bring you closer together."

Because real love values truth over comfort.
It listens, not to defend, but to understand.
It speaks, not to wound, but to heal.

Hard conversations test the strength of the bond—but they also refine it.

When love is mutual and mature, honesty becomes the bridge, not the barrier.

When both hearts stay open, truth spoken in love becomes the bridge back to peace.

11/04/2025

Triggers can be such powerful tools for healing. They help us identify a deeper underlying issue that needs healing. I think the key is not becoming offended with the person who triggered us, thus not letting the devil win in his schemes to rob us of an opportunity of pivotal awareness and personal revelation that if we do the Holy Spirit inner healing work we'll end up conquering an unhealed place within us that has caused us pain & dysfunction for a lifetime.

Abandonment has been one of those triggers for me that I've been doing deep work on in the last 12 months it seems. The awareness has been so so helpful for me navigating emotionally triggering moments showing me why im feeling, acting, reacting, and perceiving life & others through the lens of past abandonment. Every time I talk to the Lord about it i get emotional which is my sign that im still in the process of healing it. Much like ive observed the Lord bringing healing to grief based trauma. My observation is that healing comes in layers & waves with grief. Ive also observed this same pattern with trauma thats rooted in abandonment. The healing has been coming in layers and waves. In knowing & understanding this I can be patient and understanding with myself while trusting the Lord for the full healing and resolve of this area that runs deep into my childhood and adulthood.

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TRIGGER:

A trigger is an emotional reaction that surfaces when something in the present touches an unhealed wound or past experience.

It’s not the moment that hurts — it’s what that moment awakens within us.

Triggers are teachers, not enemies — they reveal where healing is still needed.

A trigger is information, not identity. Don’t shame yourself for being human.

When triggered, pause — name what you feel, not who you think caused it.

Healing isn’t avoiding triggers; it’s learning to respond instead of react.

The goal isn’t to be untriggered, but to become aware, anchored, and compassionate when they arise.

Sometimes the person who “triggered” you simply touched a wound they didn’t cause.

Every trigger is an invitation to deeper self-understanding and freedom.

10/31/2025

🌿 How to Discern If You’re in a Supportive, Life-Giving Environment🌿

Many people can’t immediately recognize when a relationship or circle has shifted from life-giving to toxic, demonic, draining, critical, or envious. It sometimes takes a series of off-putting behaviors before we identify, reaccess, & evaluate things.

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Whats The Fruit of Interaction?

🔸️Life-givers leave you feeling seen, empowered, loved, and encouraged.

🔸️ Envious, pretentious or critical people leave you feeling small, tense, second-guessing yourself.

❓️After being around them, do I feel peace or pressure?
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Whats The Tone of Support?

🔸️Supportive people genuinely rejoice when you win, grow, & improve.

🔸️True friends cheer louder when it’s not their turn to shine.

❓️Can they clap for you/others when you/others are winning, growing, succeeding?

**Am I doing this for them/others as well — mutual/reciprocal bond of support.

Don't expect what you aren't willing to give, thats self centered.

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How Do They Respond to Your Vulnerability?

🔸️ Life-givers hold your heart with care, protection and confidentiality. They are honored to be entrusted with extremely sensitive information.

🔸️Critical, unsafe people weaponize your weaknesses for leverage & become indifferent or judgemental.

❓️Do I feel emotionally safe being honest here?

❓️Is my vulnerability disrespected and used as ammunition later? — which is a form of disgusting betrayal when people are out here trying their best to trust others/deeply struggling to open up about things that need healing, love and acceptance.

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Motives Behind Their Advice?

🔸️Supportive counsel points you toward peace, growth, and God’s leading.

🔸️Or do their words create doubt, pressure, confusion, or control.

🔸️Manipulation always breeds a demonic pressure.

❓️Is their advice empowering and freeing—or controlling, manipulative, & tied to whether you obey their opinion?

❓️Does not following after their opinions, advice or wants offend, anger, upset them and cause a loss of connection?
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Is There Reciprocity and Balance?

🔸️In life-giving relationships, giving and receiving flow naturally.

🔸️With selfish dynamics, you’re always pouring out while they take or compete with you.

🔸️Mutual honor sustains; one-sided effort drains and leaves you let down, ignored, glossed over or abandoned in times of needed support.

❓️Do both parties pour into this connection, or is it just one party doing all the work & effort?
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Notice the Presence (or Absence) of Honor

🔸️Supportive people speak well of you, even when you’re not around.

🔸️Envious people distort, slander, gossip, or withhold affirmation.

🔸️Honor is the language of healthy hearts.

🔸️Honor is not flattery; it’s the consistent choice to see someone through Heaven’s lens.

🔸️True covenant relationships don’t keep score—they keep honor.

❓️Would they defend my name in my absence?

❓️Do they whisper, malign, or gossip behind your back?
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How Safe Do You Feel Being Your Authentic Self?

🔸️ Around life-givers, you can relax and be fully you.

🔸️ Around envious or critical people, you feel the need to protect, shrink, be small, walk on egg shells, self protect, defend or over explain yourself just to avoid judgment.

❓️Can I show up as my whole self without fear?

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Check the Atmosphere for Spiritual Fruit?

🔸️ Life-giving spaces produce love, joy, peace, kindness, and patience.

🔸️ Envious spaces breed contention, strife, insecurity, and competition.

“You will know them by their fruit.” — Matthew 7:16

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CLOSING THOUGHTS:

God calls you into environments where you’re celebrated, cultivated, and covered just as much as He calls you into environments where you are tested, tried , & purified!!! Both reveal who’s truly for you and what still needs healing in you. 💯💥

10/30/2025

🌿 Practical Approaches To When You’re Misunderstood

1. Clarify Once, Not Forever

It’s healthy to offer one sincere attempt to clarify your intention, tone, or meaning — but continuing to explain yourself to someone determined not to understand becomes emotional exhaustion, not communication.

✨️Say it once with integrity, then release it.

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2. Check Your Heart, Not Their Perception

Ask: “Was my intention pure? Was my delivery kind?”

If yes, you’ve fulfilled your responsibility; how others receive it is out of your control.

✨️Accountability is yours, interpretation is theirs.

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3. Stay Anchored in Identity, Not Approval

Being misunderstood can stir insecurity or the desire to “fix” others’ perceptions.

But peace comes from being rooted in truth, not in being right in everyone’s eyes.

✨️Your peace must not depend on their perspective.

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4. Don’t Retaliate—Model Maturity

Defensive reactions can reinforce their misunderstanding.

✨️Calm silence or measured restraint often communicates more strength and wisdom than overexplaining ever could.

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5. Discern Between Misunderstanding and Manipulation

Some genuinely misinterpret; others intentionally twist your words.

✨️Respond with empathy to the first, and boundaries to the latter.

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💎 Added Wisdom & Insights 💎

Misunderstanding tests your relationship with truth. It refines your ability to stay grounded in what’s real rather than reacting to what’s perceived.

Protecting your peace often means surrendering the need to manage how others perceive you.

Time and consistency in character will clear what words cannot.

Accept that not everyone is meant to get you — and that’s okay. You’re not called to be universally understood; you’re called to walk authentically.
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Video Credit:
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DQWsqz1jX9Q/?igsh=MXZyYnJ5MmdjaXZ1bw==

10/30/2025

WHAT PEOPLE ARE EXPERIENCING IN THEIR INNER HEALING TRAUMA COACHING SESSIONS:

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✨️MISSION STATEMENT✨️

My mission is to create a safe, confidential, respectful, compassionate, & supportive space for those impacted by trauma &/or spiritual oppression.

I aim to help others feel seen, heard, understood and restored through Christ-centered coaching, prayer and inner healing support.

✨️COST OF SESSIONS✨️

This service is offered freely as an expression of God’s love, mercy & grace, ensuring that financial barriers never prevent someone from receiving support & care. God has been wonderfully faithful to provide & take care of me in other ways as a result of my no cost commitment. And honestly I feel very conflicted with putting a price tag on a spiritual gift that has very much been supernaturally gifted to me for others. Im extremely humbled over & over to be used by the Lord and if you knew my past I certainly don't deserve the honor of caring such a gift.

✨️HISTORY & EXPERIENCE✨️

This ministry is tried and true, it's built upon 12 plus years of hands-on experience. Three years served in a church ministry setting. Nine years serving within a clinical setting and 3+ years in a private practice type setting. Reflecting upon my Google Calendar records, I am approaching 1,000 sessions completed. This is representative of an estimated 2,000+ hours of healing prayer and coaching. Hundreds of individuals have been served, cared for, mentored, & guided closer to Jesus the ultimate Healer of life’s deepest wounds and most horrific experiences. Every testimony and every breakthrough is to the praise and glory of God’s grace alone!!! If any wonderful thing is attributed to me I gratefully point it all back to the Lord and the work of the Holy Spirit, to which I would be nothing without.

My dedication is to helping others experience the peace, love, freedom and restoration that only God can provide.

❓️HOW DOES IT WORK❓️

Clients fill out a preliminary worksheet designed to help identify and highlight specific areas to do focused work around. We set a date/time to execute a 60 minute inner healing coaching phone call where God does the rest in the context of coaching and prayer.