Creative Mediated Solutions

Creative Mediated Solutions We help people reach creative solutions to problems that arise in life and business. Let's all think mediation before litigation. Cooperation over competition.

There is no area that affects us quite the way our family does. In fact we often define ourselves by these relationships. It is human nature to want to provide for, protect, and strengthen our families. We all face difficulties; the way we deal with these situations will determine the future health and strength of the family unit and all individual members of the family. At the Gilstrap Law Firm and Mediation Center we strive to help you achieve your goals to provide, protect and strengthen your family. Whether that is by planning for your family when you are no longer here; offering representation through divorce, custody, or child support; or Family Law Mediation, we are here to help you through this time. The courts can be a daunting place, and legal issues can be intimidating when you are not accustomed to the system. We have helped many families and we understand the process. We will listen to you, explain the different options, and assist you in determining what will work best for you and your family.

October is Conflict Resolution Month. Let's learn to mediate our own conflicts instead of asking the courts to solve our...
10/08/2025

October is Conflict Resolution Month. Let's learn to mediate our own conflicts instead of asking the courts to solve our problems.

October is Conflict Resolution Month!

There’s a misconception about neutrality.People often think it means being detached, indifferent, or unwilling to take a...
10/06/2025

There’s a misconception about neutrality.

People often think it means being detached, indifferent, or unwilling to take a stand.

But in mediation — and in life — neutrality is anything but passive.
Neutrality is active stillness.

It’s the steady presence that allows emotions to settle so truth can surface.
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Neutrality Is Not Disconnection

When I sit in a mediation, I care deeply about every person in the room.
Neutrality doesn’t mean I don’t care — it means I care enough to stay balanced.

If I lean toward one person’s story, even slightly, the other person will feel it.
And the moment someone feels unseen or unheard, the room loses safety.
When that happens, real communication shuts down.

The Mediator’s Role: Holding the Space

A skilled mediator doesn’t “fix” the conflict.
They hold the space where people can safely face what’s uncomfortable.
When no one feels judged, people start telling the truth.
And truth is where resolution begins.
This is the hidden power of neutrality —it’s not about being uninvolved, it’s about being trustworthy enough that everyone can finally exhale.

Neutrality Beyond Mediation
You don’t have to be a mediator to use this.
Think about how it applies in your everyday life:
*In a workplace argument
*In a family disagreement
*In a political conversation

When you stay calm and curious — not defensive, not judgmental —
you create psychological safety for others to speak freely.
That’s when the real work starts.

The Mindset Shift

You don’t always have to solve the problem.
Sometimes your role is to be the calm in the middle.
To create the space where others can hear themselves think.
That’s where clarity, healing, and resolution live.

Reflection for Today

This week, try noticing where people start to shut down.

Ask yourself:
“What would make this space feel safe enough for truth?”
You might find that neutrality — when practiced with care — is not the absence of engagement.

It’s the presence of peace.

https://lnkd.in/giQ9F_2G There’s a misconception about neutrality. People often think it means being detached, indifferent, or unwilling to take a stand. But in mediation — and in life — neutrality is anything but passive. Neutrality is active stillness. It’s the steady presence that allows ...

The current government shutdown is a stark reminder of how costly and slow traditional systems can be when disputes esca...
10/01/2025

The current government shutdown is a stark reminder of how costly and slow traditional systems can be when disputes escalate.

We all feel the ripple effects delayed services, stalled decisions, and frustrated citizens. But what if more conflicts were resolved before reaching that point?

Mediation shows us a different path: a way to address disagreements efficiently, fairly, and collaboratively; without waiting for courts, legislation, or government intervention.

Whether in business, family, or community disputes, we can often find solutions when parties sit down together, communicate openly, and focus on shared interests.

Before litigation. Before escalation. Before the “system” gets involved.

Sometimes, the fastest way to resolution is the human one.

Think Mediation before Litigation.

09/26/2025

Be the Mediator

Fridays are a turning point. Small disagreements from the week can linger, creating tension as we head into the weekend. But here’s the good news: you don’t need a certification to help.

Every day, in your home, office, or friend group, you can mediate small conflicts. It’s as simple as:

* Listening without interrupting
* Asking questions to clarify
* Reflecting what you hear so everyone feels understood

Take a moment this Friday to step in. Guide a conversation, help someone feel heard, and prevent a minor disagreement from spilling into your weekend.

Being the mediator in your own space isn’t about authority, it is about care.

Small acts like this now can make your weekend calmer and your Monday brighter.

09/22/2025

Two years ago, I worked with a small group of friends who wanted to start a business together. They had amazing ideas and big dreams, but every time they met, the same questions kept coming up:

Who’s actually in charge of what?

How will they make decisions when they disagree?

What if someone can’t do their part?

Through mediation, we worked through all of it. We clarified roles, responsibilities, and even created a plan for handling disagreements in the future. That early foundation gave them the confidence to move forward.

Just this week, one of them reached out to thank me. In the last 18 months, they’ve brought in over $1.5 million, and their business is thriving. It’s amazing to see how much of a difference starting with clarity can make!

08/20/2025

On September 1, 2025, Texas will raise the maximum income amount used to calculate child support guidelines from $9,200 to $11,700 per month. That means the “default” child support numbers set by the state will go up.

For example:

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One child: guideline support will rise from $1,840/month to $2,340/month

Two children: from $2,300/month to $2,925/month

Three children: from $2,760/month to $3,510/month

Those numbers matter if your case is decided in court. Judges are bound to follow the guidelines, and the legislature decides when those guidelines change.

But in mediation, the story is very different.

Guidelines Are a Starting Point, Not the Final Word
Child support guidelines exist to create consistency, but families are not all the same. Some children have greater medical needs. Some families share time almost equally. Some parents prefer to split expenses differently than the formula suggests.

In mediation, you and the other parent can look at the guidelines as a reference point, and then ask:

Does this fit our actual situation?

Do we need to adjust up or down to meet the children’s needs?

Would a different structure, like sharing expenses directly, work better for us?

Timing Becomes Less Stressful
Right now, I’m seeing parents rush to finalize before September 1 or delay until after. That kind of “race against the calendar” happens when the court system is the only option.

Mediation allows you to step out of that race. Instead of letting a law change force your hand, you and the other parent can decide on terms that make sense no matter what the legislature does.

The Bigger Picture
The increase in the cap highlights something important: when you let the court decide, you are living under rules made by strangers, lawmakers who have never met your children, and judges who may have only a few hours to hear your case.

Mediation gives that decision-making power back to you. You can choose to follow the guidelines, adapt them, or create something entirely different — as long as it meets your children’s needs.

That’s the heart of mediation: choice, flexibility, and solutions built for your family, not just the averages.

Think mediation before litigation.
05/19/2025

Think mediation before litigation.

Mediating with Neurodivergent Clients: When Logic Becomes a Lifeline

Think Mediation Before Litigation
04/28/2025

Think Mediation Before Litigation

Mediation Before Litigation

Did you know parents can create parenting plans without involving the court system?
04/28/2025

Did you know parents can create parenting plans without involving the court system?

Introduction and Table of Contents

Come join us on Substack.
04/27/2025

Come join us on Substack.

Flexibility for How People Think and Decide

03/04/2025

What are we doing around here at Creative Mediated Solutions?

When a Deal Falls Through, a New Path Emerges

Two business partners came to me in crisis. A deal they had both counted on fell through, but they had already spent money preparing for it. Tensions ran high. They disagreed on how to move forward, and while they weren’t in a legal battle—yet—they were on the verge of burning everything down.

The first step? Getting them to agree on one thing: they needed to pivot. That small agreement set the stage for real progress.

I asked each of them to write two memos—one describing what the future would look like if they got everything they wanted, and another describing what it would look like if their partner got everything they wanted. The results were eye-opening. It became clear they didn’t actually know what the other was proposing.

By slowing things down, giving them space to process emotions, and adjusting the tone of their conversations, they realized they weren’t as far apart as they had thought. What started as frustration and uncertainty turned into a path forward—one that worked for both of them.

Mediation isn’t just about resolving conflict—it’s about creating clarity, opening dialogue, and finding solutions no one saw at the start.

Why Mediation Works When Everything Else FailsThink Mediation Before LitigationThe MediatorsMar 03, 2025When conflict ar...
03/03/2025

Why Mediation Works When Everything Else Fails

Think Mediation Before Litigation

The Mediators
Mar 03, 2025

When conflict arises, most people turn to one of two options: avoidance or escalation. Either they ignore the problem and hope it disappears, or they fight to win—whether that means taking it to court, bringing in HR, or cutting ties completely.

But what happens when neither of these approaches works?

That’s where mediation comes in.

Unlike lawsuits, where a judge makes the final decision, mediation keeps power in your hands. It’s not about winning or losing—it’s about interest-based negotiation, a process that focuses on understanding underlying needs rather than positions. Instead of waiting months (or years) for a court ruling, mediation moves quickly. Instead of spending thousands on attorneys, it’s cost-effective. And instead of creating more resentment, mediation helps preserve relationships.

Why Mediation Succeeds When Everything Else Fails
✅ It’s about solutions, not blame. Courts operate on an adversarial system, which means someone has to “win” and someone has to “lose.” Mediation uses a facilitative or transformative approach, where the focus is on understanding, compromise, and moving forward.

✅ It’s flexible. In court, legal remedies are limited—damages, injunctions, or rulings that rarely fit complex human relationships. Mediation allows for customized solutions that address emotional, financial, and practical concerns.

✅ It’s private. Court cases become part of public record, and social media feuds can escalate. Mediation is confidential, protecting reputations and personal information.

✅ It’s psychologically sound. Studies on cognitive biases show that when people feel heard and understood, they’re more likely to compromise. Mediation creates a space where active listening and perspective-taking reduce hostility.

✅ It’s empowering. Instead of handing decision-making power over to a judge, mediation lets parties retain control over their own outcomes. This sense of ownership increases compliance with agreements.

A Real-World Example
Recently, I mediated a dispute between two business partners whose communication had completely broken down. One was ready to file a lawsuit, while the other wanted to walk away from everything. Instead of spending years in court, they worked through mediation and structured an agreement that allowed them to part ways amicably—preserving their reputations and saving thousands in legal fees.

Most conflicts don’t require a courtroom battle—they just need the right tools. Mediation is that tool.

If you’ve ever been stuck in a conflict that felt unsolvable, mediation might be the answer.

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https://mediators.substack.com/p/why-mediation-works-when-everything?r=8vivz

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