09/28/2025
When people talk about “inner work,” many assume it means withdrawing from the world, keeping quiet, or living invisibly. But that’s not the essence of it. Real inner work is less about what you do on the outside and more about why you do it.
One of the biggest shifts that happens is around attention. Many of us chase validation and acceptance through our actions, trying to fill the gaps in our self-esteem or soothe the wounds around self-worth through other people. But as we face our shadows and heal old pain, the craving for attention softens. We realize that our worth isn’t up for debate, and we don’t need a crowd to confirm it, because we’ve begun to discover it within ourselves.
That doesn’t mean people who’ve done the work hide away or reject visibility. In fact, inner work often leads you to share your voice, gifts, or story with the world. The difference is motive. You’re no longer shouting “look at me” to fill a void; you’re offering what you have because it’s authentic and aligned. You can receive attention without it being about ego. You can stand in the spotlight without using it as proof of worth.
It also doesn’t mean you aren’t doing the inner work if you still find yourself wanting recognition or reassurance. These are deeply human needs and come and go in moments. The difference is, as self-acceptance grows, you rely less on external approval to feel whole. With time, presence, and patience, the craving for attention loosens its grip, and what once felt like a constant hunger becomes more of an occasional whisper.
The aspiration isn’t to become invisible, but to become free to share your gifts without feeling the need to prove yourself. To shine without wondering who’s watching. To connect without clinging, and to love without bargaining.
It’s the freedom of knowing your worth doesn’t rise and fall with applause. The heart of real inner work is not erasing yourself, but reclaiming yourself. Not disappearing, but standing in the world with a steady centre.