07/16/2025
What are disconnection and dissociation asking for?
1. To be heard in their wisdom.
Disconnection is a survival adaptation that also includes elements of dissociation.
To hear a survival response means to attune to its purpose. When I say it needs to be “heard,” I'm not talking about listening to thoughts or stories; I'm talking about sensing the message behind this pattern existing. What's pointing you toward?
The bigger call of dissociation is: “You need to heal the trauma of self-suppression. We can’t live like this.”
But the immediate call is: “Your nervous system is under too much pressure right now.”
Disconnect/dissociation is linked directly to a nervous system under a lot of internal pressure or overwhelm. The internal pressure can come from:
- current high levels of stress and stimulation
- accumulated stress and trauma
- spending too many years in survival mode
- mis-attuned healing practices and interventions
- pressure to heal and process
- identification with survival
Dissociation is first a call to gentleness. More attunement. Less processing. Less stimulation. Less urgency to heal or figure things out.
Listen!
2. To be heard in its pain.
Underneath disconnection are layers of grief, anger, shame. Disconnection "speaks" about loss; the loss of feeling, the loss of self, the loss of connection to what once mattered but became too overwhelming or unsafe to stay live by.
This kind of hearing is somatic. Quiet. Spacious. It’s a soft inner posture that says: You no longer have to carry this alone.
Disconnection is asking you to witness what was once dismissed, pushed away, shamed or hurt.
Inside The Self Attunement Audio Toolkit, you’ll find a range of practices skillfully designed to help you in the process of reconnection and recovery, considering the needs and survival protections of your system.
You can access the toolkit by accessing my profile or commenting with the word “Attuned.” I’d love to meet you inside!
Love,
Ally.
