01/20/2026
With permission to post from both of her parents: this is my beautiful stepdaughter, Joanna.
Do you see how happy she looks? 🥹
Dr. Brenna Hicks' perspective of spreading information and education pertaining to Child-Centered Play Therapy is to "create a world full of happy children that become happy adults".
When I met Jo - she was only 4. She took one look at me, gasped, and took me by the hand. The rest was history.
I began practicing and utilizing Child-Centered Play Therapy skills in all our interactions - during playtime, during big emotions, during minimal interactions, and throughout all types of conversations. My goal was never to be another "Mom" figure in her life as she already has an amazing one. The goal remains the same with her along with all the other children I work with: to create a neutral relationship that harvests a strong secure attachment. Why? It always feels safe to go to no matter how she/they behave or are feeling.
There has been about 2 times in the past 2.5 years I stepped out of this perspective and put on my Step-Mom pants. Due to what? Maybe exhaustion, lack of patience, dealing with the same repetitive situation, or a combination of all 3. I can remember it clearly because it ruptured our relationship. I used a more stern tone of voice than normal (tone matters), I verbalized consequences not adherent to the behavior, and overall reacted in ways we try to teach children not to as they grow up. I've apologized, adjusted my behavior and perspective, and improved when similar situations arose. I never want parents to have to feel like they need to be perfect - because we are human and still learning ourselves.
I am still the go-to person, thankfully. I pray to still have this relationship with her as she ages. I am somewhere between a friend, sister, and step-mom in her eyes. Whatever she needs that day, I am there with my arms open.
My husband and I took her to the dells this past weekend to give her undivided attention. Originally, this was part of a Christmas gift for her.
I watched her smile and belly laugh for hours. I watched her get her needs and wants met unconditionally. I watched her feel love from both Dad and I. This was our first little family trip and it got me thinking: Why do people have children if not for this intention?
My husband and I have had countless conversations about how to best support her and how we can show up to the be the best version of ourselves as she ages. We want her to grow up feeling nothing but love and support as do most (if not all) parents.
Then I think about why I opened Giggles & Growth.
There are circumstances that are unforeseen that children experience throughout life. This could be anywhere from divorce, a change in family dynamics, a relocation, the death of a loved one, a parent changing their occupation and work hours, peer issues, academics, a diagnosis, etc. etc. etc. As parents we adapt the best we can to change however it uproots a child's life (minimally or maximally) depending upon the child. Children don't understand change on a subconscious level. They don't understand hate, sacrifices, or any other term relating to the opposite of love.
My work in the school system deepened my compassion for developing a child-perspective lens. I will spend the rest of my life advocating for children.
Procreation used to be about continuing the legacy of generations, however nowadays it is solely focused on building a family and happiness together. I hear so many parents wanting a difference for their children.
"I don't want them to go through what I did".
"I don't want them ending up like me."
"I want them to have support because I didn't".
"I want them to understand life while also remaining happy."
I hear you.
So, I made the decision to get certified working with small (but mighty) brains. Joanna played a huge role in this as cliche as that is and she will never know it. My previous clients also played a major role in this personal development. Where would I be without their inspiration? Without their laughter throughout sessions? Without their growth? I would be one BUMMED out play therapist.
The best part of this all is that they are their own agent of change - just like adults. It is not me changing them - it is them trusting me to allow them to change and process throughout time at their own pace. With trust, love, and safety - they create their own brand new neuroplasticity. It is incredible to witness.
When I see kids as happy as Joanna in the waterpark - that is how my spark keeps lighting.
Clients that trust me, parents that confide in me, and those in the middle of learning and "doing the work" are my inspiration. It is not me and all these fancy certificates.
My mind is constantly thinking about the surrounding community and how we as adults can make it a better place for children to thrive in the future. I know at times life is hard and unfair but it can also be beautiful, spontaneous, and full of growth.
I stand with Dr. Brenna Hicks on "creating a world full of happy children that become happy adults." Let's face it...they are our future. Let's make it happen.
Forever grateful I sprinted into this sacred line of work,
Alayna
