This is the story of my own personal experiences and of a transformation that has taken place within me. It has been written with the intention of challenging the established way of thinking about pain and suffering.
Let me first acknowledge that I am attempting to address an issue that is quite happily avoided by most people. Pain and suffering are not popular subjects of discussion. Most people do not like to think about pain until it affects their life, or the life of someone close to them. I should also add that this article barely scratches the surface of this topic, what I cover here is but a beginning.
On July 7 1978, I was involved in a very serious motor vehicle accident while traveling across Sweden on a motorbike. The driver of an eighteen-wheeler didn’t see me approaching and pulled out onto the highway. I collided with the front wheel of the trailer, and both the bike and I were caught under the wheel and dragged across the highway into a parking lot.
As a result of the accident, I spent four months in a hospital where Physicians performed multiple surgeries on my legs. After the procedures, I spent a year in a re-hab center. On several occasions, I came close to having my left leg amputated; given the severity of my injuries I should not even be here writing this today.
When I think back to that time, I am amazed of how little I remember of the physical pain; yet, the impact of the emotional pain is as easy to recollect as if it were yesterday. The changes in lifestyle that were forced upon me, such as the end of a career playing soccer, were devastating. I felt something was forcing colossal changes in my life, and my initial inability to accept this change caused me tremendous pain. Moreover, I couldn’t come up with any satisfactory answer as to why this was happening to me.
Inspired by the efforts and compassionate care of my therapist Peter Kuhlmann, I developed an interest in becoming a physical therapist. I will never forget the small voice inside me that said, "What would be more wonderful than to learn this art and give back to the world what has been given to me?"
After finishing school and beginning work as a physical therapist in the Netherlands, I realized there were significant limits to my ability to help my patients. Still operating on a mostly tactile basis, I decided to learn more about the mechanics of P.T. Therefore, I studied the techniques of Manual Therapy – a specialty that concentrates on disorders of the spine and joints. Although I became better able to assist my patients, I still battled with my limitations. I would care for "identical" indications in two different patients using the exact same therapy plan for each. I would discharge one with a smile on his face, while the other stayed in pain: this discrepancy frustrated me. After gaining more experience working with "typical" chronic pain patients, I came to appreciate the value of understanding the psycho-emotional aspects of pain and suffering. The experience helped me to be more sympathetic, yet my increased understanding still did not help my patients much. The desire to relieve their pain and suffering was absolutely present in me, yet there was still something lacking.
Then, shortly after my move to the U.S. in 1988, I was introduced to a small church in Lafayette, Louisiana. I arrived there with many needs, most of which I was unaware. However, over time this loving congregation met these needs. I surrendered my life to Christ and was saved. Now I had found a new model, Jesus Christ. One who is made perfect - without sin. In reading the bible, I came to learn about His pain and suffering.
Jesus said, "In this world you will have trouble" (John 16:33). Suffering is as normal for people in today’s world as it was in New Testament times. We suffer in countless ways. We groan under the burden of pain, trauma and sickness; the examples are almost endless. However, we cannot talk about our glorious future inheritance without acknowledging that the path to that glory is a cross.
Applying this knowledge retrospectively to my accident and rehabilitation, I know now, that I did not heed the warnings my dear ones gave to me. I felt completely invincible, when all the time I was on a path to self-destruction; but God was with me through it all, He wasn’t done with me yet.
Having said this, I realize that we live and work in a society that seeks to avoid pain and suffering at all costs. However, that the more we buy into the promises of "Better and Faster Pain Relief" the less able we become to handle pain and suffering - and the more it traumatizes us. The general population seems to believe that individuals are not responsible for their pain and suffering, the high incidence of litigation strongly stimulates this myth. Society widely believes that pain is always the result of an anatomical or physiological abnormality. The International Association for the Study of Pain defines pain as follows: "A sensorial and emotional experience associated with a real or potential tissue damage or described in such terms." The words "emotional" and "described" are critical elements in this definition. The individual concerned physically experiences the pain. The pain is no longer sign (albeit a sign that should be respected) of a pathological reality yet to be discovered, it has become a diagnosis, a medical category.
We cannot ignore the fact that beyond their immediate effects, pain and suffering play an important role in the way we adapt to the environment. Through the situations and difficulties that pain and suffering create, we are moved out of our comfort zones. Pain and suffering often shed light on the difference between reality – what is, and our illusions – what we want reality to be. To come to a state of acceptance often requires a radical change in outlook: changes that often go against the grain of our American culture. We are a nation of people who believe we can fix anything with optimism.
Is there is any truth to the adage "blessing in disguise"? Many of us have heard of people who have gone through trials and tribulations and have come through them as better and stronger individuals. It may well be that if our focus as health care providers is completely on the masking and fixing of pain and suffering, rather than helping patients to journey inward to find the reasons behind the pain and suffering, then we are robbing them of a precious opportunity for personal growth. The challenge is for us to join our patients as partners in the task of restoring dignity to broken spirits. Pairing a renewed sense of compassion with physical and manual therapy techniques has enabled me to serve my patients far more effectively.
“Health is not necessarily the absence of Pain and Suffering;
Rather it is the presence of Divine Serenity.” Ruud J Vuijsters, P.T.
Bibliography
Definition of Pain (as defined by The International Association for the Study of Pain)
Various Contributing Authors, The Puzzle of Pain New York: G +B Arts International, 1994 ISBN 976-8097-89-2
Recommended Reading:
Brand & Yancy, Pain: The Gift Nobody Wants. New York: Harper Collins, 1993.
ISBN 0-06-017020-4
C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain: New York: Simon & Schuster, 1996
ISBN 0-684-82383-1
