Gretchen Stecher, MA. My expertise is helping humans release anxiety and resentments, grow self-love P. I trust the process. I trust that all is well.
Deeply influenced in the early 1990’s by Women Who Run with the Wolves, by C. Estés, I know in my bones that it is possible to move away from the misery of victimhood and grow into love for one’s self and others. I draw on spiritual guides and divine energy in my life and my work, seeking and supporting authentic expression. My 20 years of 12 Step recovery includes membership in Adult Children of
Operating as usual
03/23/2022
Essential tools for inside out selfcare, unearthing resentments and deactivating them as triggers – it’s transformational to release these festering, fear-based emotional clusters!
You’re invited to experience this powerful form of inside out selfcare – join us using the link in my bio!
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Much like archeology, when we excavate and deconstruct resentments we can then place the pieces side by side and see the whole picture more clearly. It’s super empowering to experience no shame or judgment about them! It’s remarkably freeing to unearth them and see them for what they are … and do the deactivation process so that they’re no longer hidden triggers waiting to detonate. This is inside out selfcare is deeply transformational, as it de-gunks our nervous system, increasing flow, integrity and alignment with ourselves. The participant list is growing for the next Shine the Light group, where we do this releasing resentments process.
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03/16/2022
Tips for releasing resentments …
While letting go of what doesn’t work is part of inside out selfcare, just “let it go,” can be frustrating to hear (right???!!) when we have no idea how to do it. These are some tips that I’ve learned from decades of working with resentments (both on myself and with others) that can really help … how do these sound to you?
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More on the effects that resentments have on our lives, individually and globally … when we don’t feel good, we struggle to do what we want to do, what feels good to us. Resentments keep us stuck in NOT feeling good, no matter how much outside in selfcare we do. Reps in the gym, the “right” amount of water, or the “perfect” clothes or haircut, in and of themselves don’t generate or sustain clear, clean internal flow. That’s where inside out selfcare, like releasing resentments, can make a difference.
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03/02/2022
Resentments are part of our “normal.” We don’t pay them much attention because we turn away from “painful” emotions. They’re found in every culture, however, and they continue to stay under the radar everywhere. They add to feelings of separateness – do you feel close to someone when you’ve got anger or shame smoldering? Holding resentments in our bodies takes energy and space. Because resentments block the physical flow of energy, they keep us from optimal health. Some good reasons to consider releasing them, don’t you think?
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Part of inside out selfcare is feeling our emotions from a grounded place so that they can complete their cycle in our bodies. However, when we repeat fear-based emotions ad nauseum it’s not contributing to our well-being. By definition, resentments are going over and over a past experience filled with fear-based emotions (such as anger, shame, guilt, disgust). Rather than completing their cycles, they hang out in an unsatisfying internal hamster wheel that keeps us feeling stuck, jamming up our feel-good flow. Hmmm, not much fun.
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02/23/2022
Ways to find resentments ... what to look for ... Remember: NO JUDGMENT! It's great to know what's in there so we can clean it out. Uncleansed hurts become a deeper, festering mess and they impact the rest of the system, since everything's connected. This first step - identifying resentments - is crucial to the healing process. What do you find when you ask these questions? #
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When it comes to identifying resentments, blame is a key ingredient. Blame is the element in resentments that keeps us from finding the gold, namely the underlying emotions we’ve been conditioned to not feel. Ever heard that we need to feel to heal? Uh huh, yup. So here are all these feelings below the surface in resentments that cluster together and stay jammed up because blame has us lashing out instead of curiously sensing into what’s happening within. Have you thought about blame this way?
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02/16/2022
Often we don't even know we're holding resentments. There are signals indicating resentments may be lurking under the surface ... they are a place to start your inquiry ... be curious (no shoulding or blaming or rationalizing!) and for now just notice. Stay tuned for more next week!
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How do we become aware of resentments? Like other inside out selfcare practices, we pay attention to what’s happening internally. We get cues from our bodies when something’s brewing. There’s a rise in energy. You might notice heat, tingling, clenching or your voice getting louder. If you’re complaining about the same things over and over, feeling vengeful or wanting to convince others that you’re right and have them join you against someone else, those are juicy places to look for resentments. It’s great to find them! Any of those sound familiar?
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02/10/2022
With a grateful heart, I connect in this podcast with soulful Rev Rachel!! You're invited to tune in - we touch on recovery reveals, emotion management and the power from releasing resentments.
https://www.recoveryoursoul.net/podcast-1/episode/78e64192/releasing-resentments-with-gretchen-stecher-ma
Recover Your Soul with Rev. Rachel Harrison
02/09/2022
Inside out selfcare means paying attention to what's happening internally, including our thoughts and emotions. Accepting thoughts without proof = assumptions. Assumptions are a key component of resentments. Do you believe all your thoughts? As part of resentments, assumptions help us deflect away from painful/scary feelings and are often rooted in our past. Do you notice any of these in your life?
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How are resentments connected to inside out selfcare? We can’t feel good if our bodies are all clogged up with stuck energy, and resentments are stuck energy. We don’t pay them much attention because they’re such a part of our cultural norms. Ignoring or dismissing them adds another layer of gunk in our systems. Then we feel “bad.” Emotional and mental gunk clogs up our internal flow. Resentments are a common type of gunk, connected to trauma, codependency, addiction vortices, narcissistic energy and various other human maladaptations. We’ll continue here with identifying characteristics of resentments. Ever felt any of these?
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02/02/2022
In the month of February let's continue our inside out selfcare by looking at resentments. What are resentments? Scroll right to learn more. Do you resonate with any of these?
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Happy February 1st!! I am kicking off this month exploring the topic of
Listen in to this week’s video - share your thoughts and feelings in the comments below!
01/26/2022
Becoming aware of the impact of our "shoulds" is an ongoing practice, since there's a lot of "shoulding" going on in our world! When you notice internal constriction from "shoulds," see what happens when you switch your "shoulds" to "coulds" ... what happens in your body? Are your thoughts different?
If you did it today comment below with 👍
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Learn more about "coulds" in this weeks video! Comment below! ⬇️ ⬇️
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01/19/2022
Humans are a conglomeration of systems that work best when all’s flowing well! When we peel back "shoulds" we find obligation, guilt and shame, all of which jam up our internal flow. When we force ourselves to comply, we're going against ourselves, often beating ourselves up (shame) or using guilt to make ourselves do what we "should." That's from the outside in, not the inside out.
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Listen in to this week's video about outside in selfcare and share your thoughts with me.
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01/16/2022
Soul Shine - Gretchen Stecher, Psychotherapist updated their address.
01/12/2022
Our first inside out practice is noticing whenever you “should” on yourself. When I “should” do something, that’s the “right” way to do it, the “only” way to do it, the approved way to do it. "What if I don't do it right?" shows up - hello fear! That constriction jams up internal flow and alignment. Did it happen for you today? What did you notice in your body? Share your thoughts in our post below.
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In this week's with Gretchen, learn more about how the word "should" blocks internal alignment, the opposite of inside out selfcare. Do you find yourself experiencing this? Comment below ...
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01/05/2022
Let’s begin our focus on selfcare this month with some basics. Sustainable selfcare happens from the inside out. When there's internal flow and alignment, we feel good and want to keep that going.
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Happy Stardate 2022! ✨
January's focus is all about self-care. I can’t wait to share this journey with you all month long! Learn more details from my video!!
Don’t forget to register for my Mastering Boundaries Class starting January 17th! Link in bio 👈👈
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from What Happens When I Live With Good
Tip #4
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12/29/2021
Hearing that we’re in charge of our own happiness can feel highly annoying when it seems unreachable. We are most happy when we’re aligned with our authentic selves, we’re connected to our internal center and our needs are met in the moment. Then we can be fully present for others, which adds to our happiness.
Developing the ability to return to center without shaming ourselves is a journey! It includes identifying, cleaning out and keeping out constant fear-based thoughts and emotions. Focusing on what we do want, practicing going toward that is another key happiness component. The right kind of support is essential for this journey and consistency over time creates transformation.
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12/29/2021
It's now easier to call Soul Shine - Gretchen Stecher, Psychotherapist.
12/28/2021
When we grow up with enmeshed boundaries, that becomes our default setting. It’s a confusing, entwined mass of energy whose edges have disappeared. What one person feels is slathered all over and taken in by another. It’s the only way we know. Coming out of that entangled glop is possible when we begin practicing good boundaries.
When we develop good boundaries, we can allow others to experience emotions without feeling them simultaneously. We can acknowledge the uniqueness of each person and accept, if not actually enjoy, a perspective different from our own. It is so freeing to experience not being an extension of another, but to be our own, exceptional selves!
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from What Happens When I Live With Good
Tip #3
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12/25/2021
The winter holidays can be a time of reconnecting with loved ones, strengthening relationships and making space for gratitude. When we come from challenging homes, the holidays are often guilt-ridden, obligatory experiences filled with dashed hopes and painful memories. Or we just skip them all together because of the unhappy memories.
What if you give yourself permission to make the holiday season what you need?
What would feel joyful to you?
With whom would you like to spend time and how?
What happens internally when you contemplate going towards something different?
Consider being kind to yourself this season and allowing that to radiate from you out to others. Tidings of comfort and joy to you!
Douglas Pratt, LCSW Psychotherapist Psychospiritual Therapy, Interlife Spiritual Journey & Past Life Regression as well as traditional P
Blue Heron Healing Arts Psychotherapy for body-mind integration
Mindfully Me Counseling Helping children, teens, and young adults discover the wisdom within to succeed, thrive, and grow.