Supporting school leaders and educators in building psychological flexibilty using the ACT Matrix framework. Created by school psychologist Phil Tenaglia, M.A.
Created by Phil Tenaglia, school psychologist (40+ yrs, 2016 NJ School Psych of the Year). Practical tools for teachers to reduce classroom stress and build genuine student self-regulation - without behavior charts or consequences. Based on the ACT Matrix, a simple 5-minute framework that shifts from control to connection. (40+ years experience, 2016 NJ School Psychologist of the Year). This approach builds psychological flexibility and safety, transforming social-emotional learning, enhancing cooperation, problem-solving, and learning in classrooms and beyond
12/12/2025
Anyone else exhausted by "team building" exercises that backfire?
You announce it
→ half the staff mentally checks out
→ the cynicism spreads
→ and now you've made things worse.
Kevin Polk and I just recorded a conversation breaking down WHY this happens (spoiler: it's linguistics) and what to do instead.
The short version:
Stop talking ABOUT the process. Just START the process.
→ What's our shared purpose?
→ What gets in the way?
→ What actually works?
The ACT Matrix gives teams something to work WITH instead of something to fix ABOUT themselves.
Full conversation here: https://youtu.be/9j5MRkn8WL8?si=Fs1zhbLUYz0xYOOA
Worth 30 minutes if you're tired of forced trust falls and personality inventories that go nowhere.
"We're doing a team-building exercise today."Watch what happens in people's minds when you hear those words. Half the room mentally checks out. Others plan t...
11/20/2025
What if your most challenging students aren't being defiant—they're just stuck?
For 40+ years as a school psychologist, I've watched teachers exhaust themselves with behavior charts, consequence systems, and interventions that don't stick. Not because teachers aren't skilled—but because we've been asking the wrong question.
Instead of "What's wrong with you?" we need to ask "What matters to you?"
That's what the ACT Matrix does. It's a simple 5-minute framework that helps students (and adults) get unstuck by:
*Noticing what pulls them away from what they care about
*Choosing actions that move them toward what matters
*Building genuine self-regulation from the inside out
No rewards. No consequences. Just respectful dialogue that builds psychological flexibility.
This page shares practical tools for teachers who want to:
✓ Reduce classroom stress and power struggles
✓ Help students develop real self-regulation skills
✓ Create connection instead of compliance
✓ Support social-emotional learning that actually transfers
Whether you're a teacher, administrator, school psychologist, or parent, if you're looking for an approach that respects both students and educators, you're in the right place.
Start here: Download the free Simplicity Shift Quick-Start Guide → https://www.evolvingsolutions.co/simplicity-series
Let's shift from control to connection, together.
— Phil Tenaglia, M.A. School Psychologist & Family Therapist
If you work with groups or teams that get bogged down and feel stuck, attend our Crowdcast (or catch the replay), and you will learn: How to set a flexible context for success. How to settle and calm groups for collaboration How to move past sticking points and achieve success Thursday, October 23, 1 PM EST Click here to register and attend: Taming Team Yucky Stuff with the Prosocial Matrix
If you work with groups or teams that get bogged down and feel stuck, attend our Crowdcast (or catch the replay), and you will learn: How to set a flexible context for success. How to settle and ca…
Register now for ProSocial: Taming Team Yucky Stuff on crowdcast, scheduled to go live on October 23, 2025, 01:00 PM EDT.
10/13/2025
🎯 FREE WEBINAR THIS THURSDAY When teams are stuck, siloed, or talking past each other—they don't need another "trust building" exercise. They need a STRUCTURE. Dr. Kevin Polk and I are teaching the ProSocial Matrix this Thursday: → 4 questions that help teams get unstuck → Real examples → How to use this in your work Thursday, October 16, 1 PM EST Use the button to register or catch the replay
🎯 FREE WEBINAR THIS THURSDAY When teams are stuck, siloed, or talking past each other—they don’t need another “trust building” exercise. They need a STRUCTURE. Dr. K…
10/08/2025
Perspective-taking is a natural human capacity.
But in organizations, we rarely practice it intentionally.
We're too caught up in our own view, our own department, our own metrics.
The Simplicity Shift teaches teams to step back and notice: → What's actually happening (not what should be)
Try asking yourself these 4 questions every day:
1️⃣ Who’s important to me?
2️⃣ What’s the yucky stuff showing up inside?
3️⃣ What do I do to get relief from it?
4️⃣ What do I do that brings satisfaction and moves me toward what matters?
Less than a minute a day can change the way you see your life.
🎥 Watch the clip below
Watch this clip from Why Be Mindful? by Easy-Mindful-Loving.
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The Matrix is about Inviting, Connecting and Collaborating for Successful Living and Learning.
I am a psychological flexibility expert. I help teachers and students, work teams and families communicate, collaborate and solve problems.
We use this very simple diagram and a few words to get a conversation started.
It is called the ACT Matrix, a two by two grid. ACT stands for Acceptance and Commitment Therapy and Training. In education, we are interested in training. ACT is based on science and the research of what works to improve conditions for growth and change. You do not need to know ACT to use the Matrix.
You start at the top of the diagram where we take in information from our five senses. It flows down inside of us and becomes our learning history or mental experience. At the same time, we move toward important people and things in our lives and we move away from uncomfortable experiences like fear, anger, and sadness. Knowing what is going on around us, being aware of what is showing up inside of us, and recognizing, where our actions are leading us, leads to making choices that work.
You invite your learners into a conversation by asking them the questions, fill up the grid with their responses and everyone starts communicating better. It works with individuals and groups of all ages. You can use it anywhere but it is especially useful when a student or adult is feeling stuck. Asking and answering the questions is the way out of feeling stuck and getting moving toward who and what is important.
The Matrix Gets Educators and Learners Moving
The Matrix is for all of us on the front lines working to make a difference. It helps you reduce the struggles, get more done and be more effective. It also assists your learners in doing the same. The Matrix promotes psychological flexibility, which leads to resilience, persistence, and growth in the face of obstacles and difficulties. It allows everyone to “notice what works” to get teachers and learners on the same page and moving toward effective learning. Everyone feels empowered to make healthy choices and work together.
More Teaching…More Learning…Less Struggling
The bottom line is that promoting psychological flexibility in schools and classrooms leads to less struggling with what doesn’t work and more creativity, effective instruction and success. Students use the Matrix to develop the self-monitoring and self-regulation skills needed for success in school and life.
Trt it out and discover the power of psychological flexibility and what it can do for you!
