Focused Coaching and Consulting, LLC

03/14/2026

If you are trying to control it…you won’t win.

Grief isn't just devastating because of the magnitude of who or what you’ve lost; the devastation intensifies if you’re trying to muscle your way through it. 😩

Some of us treat grief like a puzzle to be solved or a weight to be lifted, but we weren't built with the "strength" to survive a broken world apart from the One who made it. 😳

When you try to “white-knuckle” your healing, you aren't just fighting sorrow—you’re fighting your own design. The "butt-kicking" exhaustion of loss isn't just the pain; it’s the friction of you trying to control the uncontrollable and your system’s natural response to it. You are exhausted because you’re playing God with your own recovery. 😤😖

You were never meant to carry the weight of "understanding why"—you were meant to carry the trust of "Who." The shift happens the moment you stop trying to manage the storm and finally admit you aren't the one steering the boat. 😳

I can hear some of you now…
•“But you don’t understand…”,
✔️You are right. I don’t. No one can because it’s your experience…my job is to help you understand how to process and find peace through your experience.

•“How long is feeling like this gonna take?”
✔️For as long as you avoid or attempt to control it.

We were not designed to have that type of control. 🧐🫆

Surrender it. ALL of it…🥺and watch what happens. 🥹 You will still carry that very tender place with all of the feelings that come along…but they won’t be carrying you.

Even though God may refuse to remove some trials, He promises that His grace is more than enough to get you through it. 🙏🏾💪🏾

Proverbs 3:5
2 Corinthians 12:9

Love you all to life. Mean it. 🫶🏾💕

03/12/2026

My client is the foundation of evidence that “Joy comes in the morning (Psalm 30:5).” Their spouse died and I recall witnessing the pain…clearly.

I also clearly recall the tiny shifts. From darkness to tiny sparkles of light that grew bigger into glimmers of hope as they processed adapting to a life without their partner.

They were recently able to use that light, that HOPE, to share it with someone who is just beginning their journey with grieving a spouse.

What was once seen as something devastating was reframed and used for good! Romans 8:28!

I found this nugget of wisdom in the vault of my E.E.I. Ministries notes this morning:

Three things you must consider when something bad happens:

1) Will you allow this thing to define you?
2) Will you allow it to destroy you?
3) Will you allow it to strengthen you?

My client chose door #3 and I am beyond proud. 🥹 💕

God is in the details. You don’t have to believe me…it’s in the word. 🫆🫆🫆

Love you to life. Mean it. 🫶🏾

03/11/2026

Chronicles of a Life Coach…

03/05/2026

God is faithful. F.O.C.U.S.E.D. Coaching and Consulting now has an Angel Donor program. It is a way for Angel Donors and Silent Investors to sponsor a client or family for coaching services, groups, or retreats in honor of their loved ones. Anonymity is respected when requested and all donors will still receive a donation receipt and certificate.

I cannot take full credit for this idea. F.O.C.U.S.E.D. has welcomed sponsors early on for special events. What makes this program so special is that one of my living angels asked if we could start this program with a donation in honor of their loved one and keep it going.

We received two donors in less than an hour.

My work is so much bigger than me and it is a blessing when others catch the vision.

Much more to come…🕊️

02/28/2026

Our grief group for today has reached capacity. Announcements 📣 will be posted soon about our next general loss group.

Our specific loss group: Loss of a spouse or partner will take place on March 7th. Stay tuned for details. 🙏🏾

02/23/2026

Had an exciting time meeting likeminded authors and members of the community at our local book fair. Some first timers, some veterans. A refreshing experience.

02/23/2026

February is almost over. Next stop…Women In Business Expo and Symposium!!!

Exclusive Women in Business Brunch featuring keynote speaker Dr. Heavenly Kimes of Married to Medicine. Enjoy an all-inclusive brunch while connecting with p...

02/21/2026

02/19/2026

Children grieve too.

They grieve differently than adults, but they certainly grieve. Some children have the language to express how they feel while others do not.

It is our job to acknowledge their grief without trying to fix it or minimize it thinking that their “youth” will help them get over it.

💗 6 year old…no prompt…no filter…created a sand jar for their shadow box to express their feelings about their parent dying:

“Well…BABY blue…not dark blue…is my sadness. Pink is my happy. I chose green because sometimes I feel confused about it. I don’t know why it happened. Ummm…red is my anger…and red is also my favorite color…but sometimes I feel angry about it…”

After working more on their shadow (memory) box and looking at photos of their loved one, some photos they were seeing for the first time…photos that included them with their loved one…the child went back to the jar…unprompted and unfiltered…and said…

“I want to add more colors and fill my jar to the top. I choose orange for special…because now I feel special…and I choose yellow because sometimes I forget that (they) died.”

When asked to choose a word that comes to mind after making their box the word chosen was “LOVE.”

💕 16 year old who was receptive to a little grief education about the difference between coping and adapting, normal reactions to trauma, and the importance of understanding how grief impacts behaviors…leaned back and took a breath… their takeaways from the session were…”this happened to me. Something tragic actually happened to me…and I’ve been feeling all these feelings…not knowing what to do…numbing so I don’t feel…feeling bad for numbing…not saying…not realizing…that something happened to me…I said that and…man…I can breathe.

As you can see…younger or older…children…your children…feel the impact of death…and they are aware of loss.

They can feel a multitude of emotions…all bottled up with no place to go…or so it seems…and when they can give their emotions a name and link them to their root…validating along the way…they can then make informed decisions without acting out with grief blinders on. 🙏🏾

Listen to your children…pay close attention…and if you struggle to listen or show up for them because of your own grief…that’s okay. You are human and the journey is different, and sometimes new, for all of you. Get to someone who can help you process with them…and to help you process and show up for you too.

02/18/2026

Grief group at our favorite lakeside residence is back!! 🙌🏾 RSVP is required, and the address will be provided at that time.

See the flyer below for contact information. Please RSVP no later than February 26th.

More information to come. Light refreshments are provided.

02/14/2026

02/13/2026

No one can prepare you for what it’s like when the services are over, the visitors stop coming, and the business is settled. In those quiet moments afterwards, it’s just you and grief.
~Focused Coaching and Consulting, LLC~