Gray Manis, LCSW PLLC

10/17/2025

This here is worth reading.

10/12/2025

09/05/2025

Numbing yourself can feel like relief - like finally shutting off the noise.

And in the moment, it is relief. It’s your nervous system saying, “This is too much right now, let’s press pause.”

But here’s the truth: you can’t numb selectively.
The same wall that quiets grief, anger, or pain also dulls joy, love, and connection.

Your body is doing its best to protect you- but protection isn’t the same as healing.

Numbness may keep you safe for a season, but if you stay there, it slowly drains the color from life. You stop feeling the lows and the highs.

Real healing happens when those emotions get a safe place to move through you instead of staying locked inside. That might look like talking it out, letting your body release what it’s held, or working with a therapist who can guide you through the layers of grief and pain.

Because your emotions aren’t enemies to be silenced - they’re signals that need tending. And the more you learn to feel them safely, the more room you create for joy, love, and connection to return.

08/20/2025

07/27/2025

Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship between equals. Only when we know our own darkness well can we be present with the darkness of others. Compassion becomes real when we recognize our shared humanity. -Pema Chödrön

07/26/2025

We’ve been taught to treat addiction like a brain disease to be managed— when in many cases, it’s a multi-dimensional wound that needs to be healed.

And when trauma is part of the story, healing isn’t just about abstaining.
It’s about integrating.

Because relapse isn’t failure.
It’s often the body’s last-ditch effort to soothe pain it doesn’t know how to hold.

Addiction isn’t always about the substance.
And it’s never just about willpower.
It’s what happens when the nervous system gets overwhelmed-and reaches for the only thing that’s ever offered relief.

For some, addiction begins with genetics or reward-seeking.

For others, it starts with emotional pain that had nowhere to go.

But for many, it’s both: a brain wired for craving, and a body carrying pain.

🧬 Yes, neuroscience tells us addiction reshapes the brain—dulling the prefrontal cortex, over-activating the amygdala, and conditioning the system to seek short-term relief at all costs.

But that same science also tells us: the brain can change.

Especially in environments of safety, connection, and internal integration.

It means we don’t stop at behavior.
We go deeper into the brain, the body, and the story.

We work across disciplines such as:
🧠 Neuroscience to understand reward circuitry
🛋️ Psychotherapy to explore emotional wounds and relational patterns
🎯 Coaching to build capacity, momentum, and motivation
🔄 IFS to understand internal coping strategies
✨ EMDR to process trauma memories
🌀 Somatic therapy to release what the body still holds

Because most addiction treatment still focuses on managing the behavior or medicating the brain. But it rarely teaches people how to feel.

How to grieve.

How to come back into relationship with themselves.

And without that, relapse isn’t just possible—it’s predictable.

Integration isn’t a luxury. It’s the missing piece.
Because when trauma shapes addiction, only healing can truly resolve (or release) it.

07/12/2025

We still have seats available for this upcoming EMDR training at WKU the weekend of August 1st. Come and learn this exciting evidence-based therapy and help your clients get past their past.

https://connectemdr.corsizio.com/event/6840849336523965c1021053nr

EMDRIA- Approved EMDR Basic Training. Part One: August 1-3, 2025 Friday-Sunday. Part Two: October 24-26, 2025 Friday-Sunday. Fridays & Saturdays 8 AM - 5 PM Central Time, Sundays 8 AM - 4:15 PM Central Time. EMDRIA-Approved Trainer: Gray Manis. Level: Beginner.

07/12/2025

All of us have an inner critic…

06/19/2025

Yes!

Some of the most resilient people I meet in trauma therapy don’t look like they’re struggling at all.

They’re highly capable. Driven. Empathetic. They hold it together in public, take care of everyone else, and have mastered the art of “pushing through.”

But here’s the thing:
Functioning isn’t the same as healing.
Adapting to pain isn’t the same as moving beyond it.

Our minds and bodies are incredibly smart when it comes to survival. We learn to cope in ways that help us keep our pain at bay - like staying overly independent, avoiding conflict, overachieving, or putting everyone else’s needs first.

These patterns often start as protection. And they work - until they start getting in the way of what we actually need.

While you might look fine on the outside, your body might still be bracing. Your relationships might still feel distant. Your joy might still feel like something you have to earn.

Healing is what happens when we stop just performing wellness and start tending to the parts of us that never got the chance to feel safe, held, or whole.

It’s slower. It’s messier. It’s deeper.

And it doesn’t mean erasing the ways you adapted. It means understanding them, honoring them - and slowly giving your system permission to live beyond them.

Not perfectly. Not all at once. But in ways that let you feel more present, more connected, and more at home in your own life.

06/10/2025

Join me for an upcoming in-person EMDR Basic Training at WKU in August! Would love to have you! Message me for details or follow the link below to register.

EMDRIA- Approved EMDR Basic Training. Part One: August 1-3, 2025 Friday-Sunday. Part Two: October 24-26, 2025 Friday-Sunday. Fridays & Saturdays 8 AM - 5 PM Eastern Time, Sundays 8 AM - 4:15 PM Eastern Time. EMDRIA-Approved Trainers: Gray Manis. Level: Beginner.