01/23/2023
Borrowed from another page!
When we avoid difficult conversations, we trade short term discomfort for long term dysfunction.
-Peter Bromberg
🌱 Many of the individuals I work with tend to avoid difficult conversations because they view these conversations as conflictual or argumentative. The thought of having difficult conversations lead us to build a narrative in our mind that there will be a negative component to communicating a difference in perspective, values, beliefs, behaviors, or needs so what do we do? We avoid…
🌿 Most individuals are very good at stewing on the idea of having a difficult conversation however, very few individuals act on communicating when things feel uncomfortable. We are commonly worried about upsetting someone close to us or rupturing the relationship, it feels so much more comfortable to just smile and pretend everything is fine. Give it time and we will just get over it…right?
Not exactly.
🌳 Difficult conversations do not have to lead to conflict. We build up this idea over time that something uncomfortable will happen if we express anything that could be seen or heard as “bad” within the relationship. Avoiding having these difficult conversations can lead to a more permanent negative impact on the relationship or create feelings of resentment, frustration, irritability, or insecurity.
🍀 Equines teach us to have these difficult conversations starting with distinguishing our own discomfort and acknowledging our fear to move forward and grow within the relationship. When we recognize that we are afraid of the horse because of its sheer size or feel intimidated by the horse communicating something to us that feels scary, do we just give in, smile, and accept the relationship out of fear or uncertainty? We can, however that does not create safety within the relationship and can then lead to conflict and further avoidance. Horses teach us the importance of perspective. We get to then decide what we want to do with the information they have given to us… it is our job to hold space for one another and find synergy.
Strides of Hope, LLC
