08/19/2025
As her doula, I am humbled to have walked this road with her. Birth is never just about the baby being born—it is about the mother being reborn. And this story, though born from pain, blossomed into one of redemption, advocacy, and profound healing.
Please honor this story with respect and hope for the future of MACs everywhere.
*******Ashley's Birth Story********
I am both fortunate and unfortunate to be able to share a story of two very different birth stories. My entrance into motherhood was not a joyous one. When my daughter was delivered via urgent c-section after a homebirth transfer, I was not in a happy place. She was handed to a mom who felt defeated, unsupported, and who had dissociated from herself after repeatedly being made to feel unheard and stonewalled. The day that was supposed to be one of the happiest days of my life quickly became ground zero for the trauma that while greatly improved, continues to live in my body today.
After 18 months of birth trauma coaching, I began researching a birth team and plan for when I was ready to have my second baby. I put together a well-rounded team that encompassed my doula, Angela Jenks, my homebirth midwife, Ashlyn Sconyers, and hospital midwife, Emily Affeldt. I had many lengthy conversations with each of these amazing women over the course of a year before even conceiving the baby that they would support me with. I transparently shared my previous experience, my fears with a second pregnancy/birth, and many, many hours of what a redemptive birth would look like: “I need my messy baby on my chest” and “I need this to be a good experience”. I participated in months of EMDR over the course of my pregnancy, helping me to pinpoint “trauma triggers” and tools to work through them as they arose throughout the pregnancy. Unfortunately, my pregnancy was one of ups and downs; there was almost always something challenging my birth plan. In every appointment with Emily, we discussed my fears of a homebirth transfer and ways that could make a hospital transfer and birth the least traumatizing for me. I lacked TRUST and SAFETY in hospital birth and made this very clear at each visit. I advocated for a “gentle c-section” (baby going straight onto my chest after delivery) at every prenatal appointment with Emily if another c-section were to happen. I was told that I can most certainly advocate for this, but it isn’t guaranteed.
At the end of the pregnancy, having developed polyhydramnios, the risks of homebirth became too great for various reasons, and we began planning for a hospital birth. I was overwhelmed with FEAR, ANXIETY, LACK OF TRUST, and LOSS OF CONTROL. I did not want to labor in the hospital by choice, but also did not want a c-section (even though it would bring me more peace) if I wasn’t going to be able to have my baby placed directly on my chest. There was a dark, stormy cloud looming over this birth that was very quickly approaching. Emily then shocked me by offering me my MAC. It was an instant weight lifted off my chest. I felt like I could breathe again! My MAC was the most redemptive birth experience! It healed me in ways I never thought possible! It re-ignited my soul and completely changed my life! I’m more present now than I have been in the last two years. I felt HEARD, CARED FOR, and PROTECTED during my MAC. This MAC was the result of 2 years of advocacy, preparation, transparency, and persistence, and presented to me as a HUGE exception that I am extremely grateful for.
*** This personal account and these private pictures are being used with permission from the family. Please do not take these photos for personal or business use.
