04/17/2026
Growing up, these were the words I so longed to hear from my parents. But because of multiple stressors—being a young immigrant family, financial instability, limited emotions and communication skills, etc, my parents weren’t able to offer that to me. And because of that, I, like so many who grew up in emotionally cold environments, never felt seen.
36 years later, these words came at the time I needed the most. And they healed my inner child. Throughout the years, my parents have really tried to take in feedback on how they could better support me. There were many tense moments at the dinner table where they took my wrath—I blamed them for the hurtful things they had said or have done, how they always invalidated my feelings, how they were never able to make me feel loved. And while those were hard pills to swallow, eventually my parents started to understand. They just did not know any other way. They have really tried their best in learning a new way of parenting, of relating even though that was never offered to them growing up.
Though things are always a work in progress, we’ve finally reached a place where we are able to forgive each other, hold space for our feelings, and heal old wounds.
With that, I want you to know that it’s never too late to heal.
May this be hope for you that healing in your family is possible. As you focus on your healing, your family experiences that healing too.
So always remember 姐姐, 你很棒. 😌
asianamerican
