Lost Got Found

05/09/2024

Sometimes, we do not communicate our expectations/needs, but we assume someone should “just know”. (🙋‍♀️I have been guilty of this too!) We then become disappointed, frustrated, or even resentful if the person does not meet our unspoken expectations. Communication is key. 👏

(paraphrased quote: “unspoken expectations are premeditated resentments”)

05/08/2024

Numerous studies have shown the benefits of hugs. One study had half of the participants receive a 20-second hug from their partner before public speaking, and the other half did not receive one. Individuals who received the hug had lower heart rates and blood pressure throughout their speech, suggesting hugs from our support system may lower our reactivity to stressful life events and benefit our cardiovascular health. ❤️

05/07/2024

In a podcast I listened to by , she shared how there’s more societal acceptance of fight or flight as trauma responses, but less acceptance of freeze and fawn responses. The nervous system responds in one of 4 ways instantaneously to protect the body.

1) Fight: sympathetic nervous system confronts the threat to protect self
2) Flight: sympathetic nervous system escapes the threat to protect self
3) Freeze: parasympathetic nervous system makes the body become immobile to decrease attention to protect self
4) Fawn: parasympathetic nervous system appeases the threat to protect self

Instead of shaming your freeze or fawn trauma response, which can negatively impact recovery, embrace the response that your nervous system selected with compassion and kindness. Your nervous system was just trying to protect you. ❤️

05/03/2024

Have you ever finished final exams or completed a deadline at work and got sick in the days after? Why would you get sick once the stress was finally over? Well, because the stress in your body is actually not gone, even though the stressor (the exam, the deadline) is.

Emotions are like a tunnel - they have a beginning, middle, and end. Negative effects come when we get stuck in the tunnel.

We must signal to our nervous system that we are safe to get out of the tunnel. Or else we won’t shift from a state of stress (sympathetic nervous system) to relaxation (parasympathetic nervous system). This can have negative impacts to our:
* Cardiovascular system
* Immune system
* Digestive system
* Musculoskeletal system
* Reproductive system

So, how can we complete the stress cycle?
1. Physical activity - any movement. Even as simple as tensing every muscle in your body then releasing.
2. Breathing - slow breath in and even slower breath out.
3. Laughter or crying - both provide a release.
4. Positive social interaction or affection - connecting with others tells the body that it is somewhere safe. A hug also gives us that safety that we’ve escaped threat.
5. Creative self-expression - puts the emotions outside of the body through art, stories, music, etc.

Information summarized from the book “Burnout” by Emily Nagoski, PhD () & Amelia Nagoski, DMA

05/02/2024

Andddd we’re back! Tbh I really don’t enjoy posting on social media just for the sake of posting. I only like posting when I feel inspired to. Lately I’ve been feeling inspired, and I just realized the last post on here was 2 years ago, which is wild.

May is mental health awareness month - take what you need 🤍

1. Less screen time - linked to improving mood
2. Start a new hobby - can help reduce stress and increase creativity
3. Get a good night’s sleep - improves learning and problem-solving skills
4. Meditate - improves mental clarity
5. Practice gratefulness - can improve sleep, mood, and immunity
6. Healthy exercise - increases energy
7. Spend time with loved ones - close, quality relationships are linked to happiness/fulfillment
8. More sunshine - vitamin D is a mood booster

08/24/2021

Dennis Gillan, a mental health advocate and friend of mine, lost both of his brothers to su***de. His foundation’s mission is incredible and he’s now giving individuals a chance to share their sorrows.

Read about it here: https://halfasorrow.org/share-your-sorrow/

Dennis Gillan - Mental Health Advocate & Speaker
Half A Sorrow Foundation

From Our Executive Director, Dennis Gillan: My life changed for the better the day I started to talk about my sorrows. I was at a fundraising event for su***de prevention …

08/22/2021

In a movie I was watching on my flight back to LA, someone said: “We all make mistakes. It’s what you do after that shows who you are”.

During my first years of therapy, I was primarily working through trauma, processing experiences where I was the victim. More recently, I’ve been focusing my sessions on mistakes I’ve made, toxic traits I’ve noticed in myself, & times I’ve hurt people. It sucks reliving these types of experiences, just like reliving trauma sucks, but it’s been therapeutic being honest about my whole self, so I can process and move forward.

My therapist has been teaching me to have more compassion when I speak about my past- not making excuses for my behavior, but instead forgiving myself and working on ways to respond better if I am ever in future, similar situations. I believe people can change if they put in the work and effort to do so, which is a huge part of the reason I’m in therapy.

So, if you’ve been hard on yourself for a mistake you’ve made, here’s your reminder to have compassion for yourself, forgive yourself, and work toward being a better version of yourself in the future. And, I’ll be doing the same. 🤍

06/01/2021

Forgiveness does not equal reconciliation. Many misunderstand this (I used to), assuming forgiveness requires making up with the person who hurt you. But, you can forgive and move on without needing reconnection with the individual, if that is what brings you peace. Forgiveness is for you; not the other person.

There are many health benefits to forgiveness. Studies have found that the act of forgiveness can lower the risk of heart attack; improving cholesterol levels and sleep; and reduce pain, blood pressure, and levels of anxiety, depression and stress.

On the other hand, reconciliation is an interpersonal process. There is dialogue to discuss what happened, expressing the hurt and listening for remorse. This can make the forgiveness process easier, but it is not the same as forgiveness.

Forgiving also does not mean forgetting. A healed memory is not a deleted memory, but instead we remember the memory with more compassion.

📸:

03/10/2021

Here’s a bit of a rant... I watched Oprah’s interview before reading into the public’s reactions. After watching, I started reading articles, almost all of them slanted against Meghan Markle + Prince Harry.

There’s a lot of benefits to social media & the internet, but something I often find incredibly frustrating is that many will read headlines and draw their conclusions, rather than going to the source and forming their own opinion. So many articles only shared short clips or quotes from the interview, saying that Meghan was overreacting or making herself a victim. I honestly don’t follow along with the royal family drama to speak on much of what was shared, but specifically in regards to the mental health struggles & suicidal thoughts Meghan expressed during the interview- it was clear to me on-screen that she had previously been struggling.

It doesn’t matter how rich, famous, successful, beautiful, or even royal you are. You can still struggle with your mental health, even if you seem like “you have it all”. This is what leads to further stigma when people say Meghan has no right to complain about her life. If anything, her “seemingly perfect life” probably made her feel more alone because often individuals then feel like they “should” be okay.

People’s lack of empathy blows my mind sometimes. Believe someone when they say they’re struggling. Offer support & love, rather than hatred.

- Emily, founder of Lost Got Found

03/05/2021

🤍🤍🤍
this is something I talk about often in therapy- I speak publicly about my mental health experiences for a living, which can sometimes make people think I’ve fully worked through my trauma. But, that isn’t always the case every day. So, whatever you’re going through, even if you carry it well, it’s still heavy. & It’s okay to need support or help from others.

10/09/2020

I felt this on a DEEP level 😂 anyone else?
(& if you have any tips for dealing with anxiety, please share!)
🎨:

09/03/2020

WE MOVED! Our founder relocated to Los Angeles, so we did, too! Mailing address: 200 S Barrington Avenue #491309 Los Angeles, CA 90049