10/24/2022
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=627491338822523&id=100046849876635&mibextid=cszuSN
Some truths I’ve learnt postpartum:
You’ll miss the girl of yesterday, but love who she is becoming even more.
Asking for help doesn’t make you weak, we weren’t designed to do this alone.
Unwanted intrusive thoughts are really common, and yet we never talk about them.
You can be in so much company and still feel lonely.
You’ll never feel so strong and so vulnerable all at once.
You’ll never be so attune to someone else’s feelings, their breathing, their cries, its incredibly beautiful and incredibly exhausting.
You’ll get asked if they’re a good baby, you’ll wish you responded with, “they’re all good babies”.
You’ll be triggered often, you may even have to reparent yourself in some ways.
You’ll scroll a lot, your feed will be over taken with Mum accounts and baby things, some of which will give you Mum guilt. You don’t need that, it’s hard enough.
You’ll cringe at some of the things you said, or the things you didn’t do for your friends with kids, way before you had any of your own (I get it now, and I’m sorry)
Your baby is not manipulating you, it’s biologically normal for them to want you close, and that’s no bad habit.
If you simply kept the kids alive today, then you achieved a lot.
That crying in the shower is something we’ve all done, sometimes we don’t even know why.
Your brain will go missing for a while.
It is not a one size fits all, the routines, the apps… no one knows your baby better than you.
You’ll feel distant from your partner, the one thing that makes you feel as if you’re floating one minute has you both sinking the next. Sometimes it’s an ocean between you (but it won’t always be like that).
You’ll crave alone time and yet when you’re without them it feels like a piece of you is missing.
They grow so fast (but you won’t enjoy every minute) and that’s OK.
You’ll get better at this, but mostly you’ll get better at just rolling with it.
You’ll never know patience until you become a mother.
You’ll never know a person inside out until you become a mother.
You’ll never know how love can turn you inside out too.
And you’ll be forever changed, but in the best way.
Words available in the hardback edition of ‘From One Mom to a Mother’ poetry book: available here: www.jessicaurlichs.com/shop
Words: Jess Urlichs, Writer
Art: O Trocatintas
