02/07/2026
Meet my tiniest coworker: our Chief Chaos Coordinator, Director of Gift Redistribution, Junior VP of Unwrapping, Professional Box Inspector, Chief Cheer Intern, and Executive Director of Mess Management. As a work-from-home company owner, I have daily “help” with organizing our surrogacy gift boxes—and she approaches the role with unmatched enthusiasm. She conducts immediate and thorough surprise inspections of every incoming package, opens boxes at lightning speed to confirm the contents are “fun enough,” and ensures no item remains in its original location for long. Her advanced logistics strategy includes redistributing important items to new and exciting (often undisclosed) locations, implementing maximum floor-coverage toy scattering systems, and providing innovative tape-peeling and label-pointing solutions. She firmly believes every delivery deserves immediate attention and that every room deserves a little more chaos.
Beyond operations, she leads workplace culture and morale by delivering spontaneous dance breaks, joyful squeals, dramatic storytelling, and perfectly timed hugs throughout the workday. She serves as Assistant to the Gift Fairy, Sparkle & Glitter Specialist, and full-time reminder that everything should happen immediately. She’s also currently in training with Potty Training Operations, where she specializes in urgent last-minute “I have to go potty!” alerts, celebrates successful missions with championship-level pride, requests applause, snacks, and stickers for outstanding performance, and occasionally schedules bathroom breaks at the exact moment shoes are on and we’re trying to leave the house.
Her qualifications include running everywhere instead of walking, strong opinions about snacks, advanced negotiation skills (“just one more”), fearless curiosity, and a proven ability to be both unbelievably helpful and delightfully chaotic. She’s paid in hugs, snacks, bedtime stories, and unlimited love—and she brings unmatched joy (and just a touch of chaos) to every single workday at home. Truly my cutest employee and an irreplaceable part of the company 💛 ❤️
