28/04/2025
We are here if you need someone to talk to.
Two su***des, two years apart, during the same week for the Bangor Maine Fire Department.
After posting about LT. William VanPeursem this morning, we noticed two years ago today that a post was shared for FF. Jacob Madden who also died by su***de on 4/22/2023.
As easy as many say it is to “reach out”, its not. Its not easy at all. As public safety personnel we hold ourselves to a standard the general public would never understand. We are the problem solvers, the heroes, the ones everyone turn to when the s**t hits the fan. To say, “I have a problem” is not easy.
The stigma surrounding first responder mental health is real. We are the stigma. We are the problem. Our history and traditions tell us that we need to be burley men that dont feel pain, dont ever give up, and never say we quit. This issue (stigma) runs through our blood and feeds ours brain cells to ensure we are the best we can be.
We treat our “family” in the firehouse with the same stigma we say we need to fight. At any point when a firefighter fails or struggles, we judge, point fingers, and talk s**t. Comments get made “they don’t have what it takes”, “they don’t belong here”, “they’re to soft”. When the time comes, its easier for someone to take their own life then seek help and assistance from their “family”. The brotherhood has a serious
problem.
Even though we have no idea the horrors or demons these men faced on a day to day basis, we know that stigma is real. Su***de is real. Yes, we all wished they would have just asked for help, but realize for these poor souls what the easier solition was?
As someone who has personally lost 5 friends and fellow first responders to su***de, and has/is battling the demons on a day to day basis, I’d be more than willing to have a conversation with anyone who wants to disagree or just have a conversation. A constant reminder that we need change. Never forget there sacrifice.
***de ***de
