E-Motion Psychotherapy

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United States
Mamaroneck, NY
E-Motion Psychotherapy

Licensed marriage and family therapist Tory L. Eletto. LIV by E-Motion Psychotherapy is a located in Westchester and NYC.

We are dedicated to empowering individuals and their surrounding relationships. Our hope is to help foster growth, and teach you how to life the life you want. Liv, our Mind & Body Studio, is an addition that is unique and proactive. Our studio offers Yoga & Meditation, combined with insight, to truly embody overall well being.

09/06/2025

Safety is our nervous system settling when we sense we don’t have to perform. It’s in the way our guard drops when we trust we won’t be judged or dismissed. It’s the breath we didn’t realize we were holding until we feel it release. Safety is about real presence.

But here’s the truth: we can only create that kind of safety for others when we’ve begun to cultivate it within ourselves. Inner safety is the foundation. It’s the practice of meeting our own thoughts and emotions without harshness. It’s learning to stay with ourselves instead of abandoning who we are in moments of fear, shame, or self-doubt.

When we feel safe within, we become safer to be with. Others feel it in our steadiness, our compassion, our authenticity. They soften, because we’ve softened. They breathe more fully, because we’ve learned to breathe with ourselves. And that kind of success doesn’t just change relationships, it transforms the spaces we live, love, and work in.

09/03/2025

Sometimes we grieve in phases while we’re still inside the relationship. Grieving unmet needs, the moments of connection we thought would come, the version of the relationship we imagined it could be.

We grieve the parts of ourselves we compromised to keep the peace, the way we quieted our voice, or stayed hopeful even as the evidence told us otherwise.
By the time we finally walk away, the goodbye isn’t the start of grief, it’s the culmination of it.

Leaving becomes the last act of acceptance. This kind of grief is layered and complicated. It’s not about a lack of love, but the painful realization that love alone isn’t enough when a relationship cannot meet us how we need.

09/01/2025

For so long, I thought connection meant making sure others were consistent, available, or capable of meeting me. But that lens kept me chasing their capacity instead of tending to my own.

The real work is not about controlling how others arrive, but no longer abandoning myself in response. It’s staying rooted in my values, honoring my boundaries, and showing up in alignment of who I really am.

Not waiting, trying to change, or taking someone else’s capacity personal, but choosing to stay true to me. Not being reactive, avoidant, or over functioning, but staying deeply grounded in my worth.

The foundation of true belonging begins when we are able to fully meet ourselves, regardless of how we are being met.

08/31/2025

What isn’t communicated is still felt. Our nervous systems pick up on tone shifts, silences, and the weight of what goes unsaid. What’s felt is then interpreted, and those interpretations are rarely neutral. They’re shaped by our past experiences, our fears, and our wounds. Which means what we end up believing is often inaccurate.

This is why communication isn’t just about words; it’s about reducing the distance between what is happening and what is imagined. Silence may feel safer in the moment, but it usually creates more space for stories and assumptions. Clarity, even when imperfect, closes that gap.

Healthy communication isn’t about saying everything perfectly, it’s about showing up and bridging the space between what’s true and what’s imagined. That’s where relationships thrive & where connection grows.

08/30/2025

Fear rises when you’re about to betray yourself and when you’re about to become more of yourself. On the surface, the emotion looks the same, but underneath it carries very different truths.

Fear that signals misalignment feels heavy and dense. It closes you down, makes you smaller, and often leaves you bracing against yourself. There’s a sense of dread or resignation, a pull away from your own center.

Fear that signals alignment carries a completely different texture. It feels like trembling aliveness, a quickened heartbeat, butterflies in your stomach. It’s vulnerable, but it’s also alive. Instead of pulling you away, it opens you to possibility.

This is why fear can’t be the compass. The body holds the wisdom.The next time fear rises, pause and notice what lives underneath. Is it pulling you away from yourself, or is it inviting you closer to who you are becoming?

08/24/2025

Parenthood will ask you to put yourself last sometimes. When your kids are sick, you don’t have a choice. You have to abandon your work, your sleep, your routines, your own body. You step completely out of yourself and anchor to their world.

Then in the next breath we wonder why self care feels impossible at times. Why we feel depleted even after the crisis passes. Why rest, creativity, or listening inward feels so foreign.

It’s not because we’re bad at self care, it’s because there are very real moments that require complete abandonment of self. But we don’t talk enough about how often we have to consciously practice coming back to ourselves.

That if we don’t, our nervous system learns to live in self abandonment. That one of the hardest parts of parenthood is the dance between showing up fully for the ones you love, and finding room to remember to fully show up for you too.

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if we talked about this more. If we normalized this more. If we understood that the post partum era of parenting was really a self abandonment era.

That the self abandonment will have different impacts on us depending on the support we have, the way it triggers our trauma, and our own mental health. What it would be like if we start realistically weaving these concepts into parenthood.

I talk a lot about self abandonment on this page, but this recent stint in my life made me want to express these concepts, and the work around what it means to have to juggle the needs of our kids and our own. Would love some of your thoughts here ❤️

08/21/2025

Self trust is the internal belief that you can rely on yourself. You trust deeply in your feelings, your intuition, and your capacity to handle what life brings. It’s not about getting it right, but knowing you won’t abandon yourself either way.

Instead of outsourcing your worth, decisions, or clarity to others, self trust anchors you in your own truth. It allows you to walk your own path, awaken your own self discovery, and unfold your own unique journey. With self trust you feel rooted knowing that no matter what happens, you will come back to yourself.

You feel grounded amongst the fear and doubt that still shows up. You know that you won’t betray yourself if something starts to feel off.While choices or fully showing up will still feel hard, you can hold yourself despite it.

Self trust feels like coming home to yourself. A quiet, steady, and deeply supportive relationship we often try to find in others, but first need to cultivate within. Once we center here, every decision becomes easier, every area we show up in becomes more true.

08/18/2025

When someone upsets you, it’s about now. Their words or actions cross a line, dismiss your needs, or disrespect your boundaries. It’s about the present interaction, and they hold responsibility for their behavior.

When someone upsets your wounds, it’s about past pain. The hurt belongs to a part of you that has been here long before this moment. The current situation may have sparked it, but the intensity of the reaction is connected to old pain. And that tending belongs to you.

Sometimes scenarios require both but the clarity matters. Without this distinction, we risk either blaming others for all of our pain, or blaming our past for all of the hurt. The truth lives in the balance that we each carry a different piece of responsibility, and together, that’s how healing becomes relational.

08/14/2025

After 85 years of research, the Harvard Study of Adult Development found that close, supportive relationships are the strongest predictor of health and happiness.
When we feel safe, seen, and supported, our bodies relax, our stress hormones settle, our hearts work more efficiently, and even our immune systems get stronger.

Connection doesn’t just make life feel better, it actually makes us healthier & helps us live longer. Investing in your relationships is essential to your well being. It is why my entire career has focused on relationships, and the foundation of them being the relationship we have with ourselves.

When we meet ourselves more deeply, we expand our capacity for closeness and intimacy with others. Remember it’s not the amount of connections but the depth and safety of them. Even one relationship where you can be fully yourself changes the course of your health, your happiness, and your life.

11/21/2024

I didn’t know how to honor who I was becoming because I was too caught up chasing who I thought I would be. I didn’t know how to listen to my body until I burnt out. I didn’t know how to understand my needs because I was busy comparing & judging my burn out.

I didn’t know how to connect to myself because I had so much to do. I didn’t know how to feel my emotions because I was to busy numbing to survive. I didn’t know how to take self accountability because I was so busy casting blame. I didn’t know what to do once I finally let myself feel it all.

I didn’t know the radical changes motherhood would have on my nervous system. I didn’t know that no matter how much support I received, I ultimately had to rediscover myself. I didn’t know that I would have to slow down in my career to really live the practices I taught.

I didn’t know how important that was to my soul. I didn’t know what it would do to our family financially. I didn’t know that all the healing I have already done wouldn’t save me from having to meet myself again. I didn’t know that healing was really just a way we choose to live.

I didn’t know, or maybe in the reverse, I knew too much. Sometimes that makes us blind to learning. To discovering. To leaning into the true unknown around being human. I don’t know what that means for me on here but I do know how grateful I am to have this space to show up on this human journey with you. Love to you all 🫶

10/25/2024

Sometimes we choose to keep a relationship in tact with the awareness of the other person’s painful limits. Sometimes we weigh those limits against ending the relationship completely. But the choice becomes more conscious when we accept what the reality of relationship is, and what the other persons limits may bring up in us.

Particularly around family, I help reframe being triggered by those shortcomings as the body’s reminder of the disconnect. The moment they say something that crosses your boundaries, your body will remind you. The time they aren’t aligned with your values, your body will remind you. The experience you have with them where you may not feel seen, your body will remind you.

But the way that we respond to that disconnect changes. Maybe we no longer react, but take care of ourselves. Maybe it’s honoring the grief we feel as we accept who they are. Maybe it’s in the worth we reclaim so that we don’t go chasing it through them.
Maybe it’s the reminder that we have the ability to choose differently at any time.

When we consciously choose them we are also choosing to manage this disconnect. We are no longer powerless like we may have felt as children. We are no longer choosing them in hopes they will change. And we are grateful to our bodies for the reminder of what limits don’t serve us.

10/24/2024

Maybe it’s not a boundary issue- it’s a fear of facing what’s underneath jssue. Maybe it’s not about saying the thing - it’s about facing what happens when you actually say the thing out loud. Maybe it’s not about the conversation, but what the conversation might reveal.

Maybe it’s not the boundary- maybe it’s about feeling responsible for their emotional experience. Maybe it’s not the boundary - maybe it’s about all the ways you learned to suppress yourself in order to keep a relationship in tact.

Maybe it’s not the boundary…

Address

501 E Boston Post Rd
Mamaroneck, NY
10543

Telephone

+19144973075

Website

https://tory-eletto.mykajabi.com/

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