What are the opening hours?

Monday 9am - 5pm Tuesday 9am - 5pm Wednesday 9am - 5pm Thursday 9am - 5pm

http://www.robertgardnerphd.com/

Robert Gardner, Ph.D., Psychotherapy, Mandeville, LA (2025)

08/08/2024

Traits of Happy People

When we look at ourselves, it's often our character, or lack thereof, that stands out the most. But not all character traits are equal, at least not insofar as happiness is concerned. Based on research, there are five traits that have the greatest impact on your happiness.

1. Courage

Fear is the great enemy to happiness. It robs us of resolve and ability to overcome the challenges we face. Courage, on the other hand, is the antidote to fear. It allows us to challenge our comfort zones, approach people and situations, embrace life, and accept the pain that's inevitable in all of our lives. Without courage, happiness is little more than an illusion.

2. Patience

Impatience is another enemy to happiness. When we are impatient, we struggle to accept and allow things to happen especially things we cannot control. Life is ever-changing and unpredictable. It simply is not 100% controllable. The more we try to control the outcome of events that occur, the more frustrated we'll feel. Therefore, we should learn to accept uncertainty and let life happen.

Being patient means "going with the flow" and allowing ourselves to breathe, relax, and let life happen, at least a little. This is critical to living a happy life.

3. Gratitude

To be grateful is to notice the good even when life isn't going quite as planned. Learning to be grateful requires seeing what isn't always on the surface. It requires retraining your mind to think positively—letting it permeate your mind-set and the overall way you experience life. When we're grateful, our problems don't disappear, they simply occupy less space in our hearts, minds, and lives.

4. Love

Love is a central element to a happy life. Just imagine a life lived without it. Impossible, right? The more love that appears in your life and in your heart, the happier you will be. Said another way, the more you love life, the more life will love you back. Love affords us with the ability to seek and accept others for who they are, not who we think they should be. Love helps us see the best in ourselves and in others.

5. Forgiveness

Refusal to forgive leads to a self-imposed imprisonment. People who hold on to the wrongs done to them feed the pain that also promotes unhappiness. When we decide to forgive, we free ourselves by letting go and the pain dissipates. This allows us to experience greater joy and happiness. Open your heart to forgiveness. When you do your heart will finally be open enough to catch its share of happiness as well.

Activity: Being happier

Reflecting on the traits listed above and apply them to your life:

Which trait do I struggle with the most?
What can I do to overcome my struggle with this trait that leads to me being happier?

If you want to learn how to be happier, please contact me to schedule a free phone consultation. Therapy can be the ideal setting to explore this topic. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

08/04/2024

How to Communicate Boundaries in Relationships

You have come to realize it’s time to set some boundaries in your life. Creating boundaries is essential to maintaining relationships with friends, family members, and coworkers that's built on trust and respect. Once you've decided what healthy boundaries are, the next step is communicating them to those people around you.

Here are some tips for how to share your message on what you believe constitutes a healthy relationship (i.e., defined boundaries):

Be clear. Explain exactly what you expect so that there’s no room for misinterpretation. For example, if you don’t want to work evenings, say, “I’m available between 9 a.m. and 6 p.m.” rather than “I can’t work late,” since “late” can mean different things to different people.

Establish consequences. Explain what will happen if your boundary is crossed. For instance, if your child regularly yells, say, “If you raise your voice while we’re having a conversation, I will leave the room until you calm down.” And most importantly, follow through on those consequences.

Use the sandwich method. If you’re concerned about how the other person will react, try sandwiching your boundary between two positive statements. For example, if you’re feeling overwhelmed by how frequently your sister calls, you could say, “I love our chats, but I’ve been so busy with this new job that I’m not able to talk each night. Can we schedule a time each week to catch up?”

Do you struggle to set boundaries?

Setting and communicating boundaries can be a challenge. If you struggle with navigating the intricacies of relationships between family members, friends, coworkers, and other acquaintances, an experienced therapist can help. I can provide you with guidance on how to effectively create healthy boundaries with people in your life. Contact me today to schedule a therapy session to address this important topic. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

07/31/2024

Truths about Relationships

It is easy to make your relationships more complicated and difficult than they need to be. Here are 12 simple truths about relationships to help you keep them healthy and on track.

All successful relationships require some work. Relationships exist and thrive when the parties involved take the risk of sharing themselves with another.
Most of the time you get what you put into a relationship. If you want love, give love. If you'd like to feel understood, try being more understanding. It's a simple practice that works.
You shouldn't have to fight for a place in someone else’s life. Never force someone to make time and space in their life for you. If they know your worth, they will create it for you.
There is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some people will test you, some will use you, and some will teach you, but most importantly, some will bring out the best in you. Learn to accept the differences between these people.
We all change, and that’s okay. Healthy relationships always move in the direction of growth—for the relationship as a whole and for everyone in it. When you connect with a true friend, this person helps you find the best in yourself.
You are in control of your own happiness. Nobody else can make you happy—it's something only you can do. You must create your own happiness first before you can share it with someone else.
Forgiving others helps you. Forgive others, not because they deserve it, but because you deserve peace.
You cannot change people—they can only change themselves. Instead of trying to change others, give them your support and lead by example.
Arguements are a waste of time. The less time you spend arguing with the people who hurt you, the more time you'll have to love the people who love you.
You are better off without some people in your life. If someone continuously mistreats you, have enough respect for yourself to walk away. You'll be okay, and far better off in the long run.
Small gestures of kindness go a long way. Honor your important relationships in some way every chance you get. Every day you can make small gestures to show your appreciation for others.
Even the best relationships don’t last forever. Nothing lasts forever. Look around and be thankful for your family and friends that allows you to share new life experiences.

Activity: Define relationships in your life

Referring to the “truths” listed above, create a clear statement on how relationships will exist in your life going forward. Acknowledge any changes you want to make so you can have better relationships.

If you would like more information about how therapy could help you define relationships in your life, do not hesitate to contact me to learn more.

Source: Adapted from the book 1000+ Little Things Happy Successful People Do Differently | https://robertgardnerphd.com

07/27/2024

How Faith Can Help with Depression and Anxiety

It has long been believed that having faith is key to getting through many of life’s greatest challenges. A spiritual practice can often give people the strength and guidance to overcome obstacles and make positive changes in their lives.

When a person is experiencing depression, it requires a treatment plan designed to meet that person's unique needs. While cognitive behavioral therapy and prescription medications work well for many people, others may benefit from relying on a spiritual practice.

If you are suffering with depression, here are three reasons why you may want to focus more on your faith:

1. Faith Offers Hope

A belief in a loving power greater than ourselves can help us feel hopeful, even in our darkest hours. Faith enables us to feel supported during a time when support is most needed. And when we start feeling more grounded in our lives, we naturally feel hopeful for our future.

2. Your Behaviors Evolve

Whether it’s through praying, meditating, or attending a spiritual service or gathering, faith-filled people tend to experience positive changes in their attitudes and behaviors. Where once you may have had an emotional reaction to a situation, you might now be able to center yourself instead and face situations with calmness and clarity.

3. Your Perception Changes

Faith has a way of helping us see ourselves and our lives differently. Problems turn into opportunities, enemies into friends, and impossibilities into possibilities.

While it may take some time before you feel relief from your depression or anxiety, by embracing faith, you will be better able to cope with the symptoms.

If you are suffering from depression or anxiety, please contact me to schedule a free, phone consultation to learn how therapy can help. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

07/23/2024

Making Self-Care a Priority

Arguably, there’s nothing more important than taking time to care for your own health and wellbeing. In spite of a commonly shared belief, self-care isn’t selfish. It’s a necessary act that allows you to be fully present for yourself, others, and in your life.

The saying, “running on empty” rings true when it comes to self-care. We can’t show up for others if our own tanks are empty. So, what do we do about it? Through self-care practices, you create a more positive self-image and develop healthy habits that empower you and set you up to live your life to the fullest.

What exactly is self-care?

Self-care is the practice of prioritizing your personal wellbeing, which can have the effect of reducing stress, and enhancing overall happiness and personal satisfaction. Self-care is about paying attention to your health-related needs and making choices to improve your mental and physical wellbeing.

People often assume self-care means indulgent spa days and pampering yourself, but in reality it’s a practice that goes much deeper. Some self-care practices, like setting boundaries in relationships or attending medical appointments, might not always feel necessary, but they’re essential for maintaining optimal wellbeing.

Remember, it’s okay for self-care practices to look different from person to person. It’s all about finding what activities help you feel rejuvenated and energized.

Why is self-care important?

Self-care is an important practice because it consists of identifying your needs and meeting them as best you can. Taking a proactive approach to addressing your wellbeing can positively impact many areas of your life. Ultimately, paying attention to your wellbeing enables you to live the life you want in the most fulfilling manner possible.

Self-care practices

If you’re new to self-care practices, it can feel overwhelming to know where to start. My recommendation is to start small so you can build momentum to making self-care a priority. Remember, the goal is to become a happier and healthier you.

Activity: Simple self-care practices

Here are three simple self-care practices you can commit to doing throughout your day. I recommend you do these practices together as a self-care “check-in” moment.

Breathe deeply: Calm your mind and body by taking five deep breaths.
Hydrate: Carry around a water container and drink to stay hydrated and energized.
Stretch: Do a quick stretch to release muscle tension where you feel it.

To learn more about how to make self-care a priority, please contact me to schedule a free phone consultation. I specialize in helping individuals develop habits that foster better self-care. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

07/19/2024

Adopting a Growth Mindset

According to research conducted at Stanford University, people essentially adhere to one of two mindsets—a fixed mindset or a growth mindset. People with a fixed mindset believe their basic qualities, such as intelligence and talents, are fixed traits. Instead of developing their intelligence and talents, they believe their traits alone will lead to success. Brain science has proven them wrong.

People with a growth mindset believe that they can improve their intelligence and talents with effort. By applying themselves, they believe they can get better. They see their brain and talent as just the starting point to build upon with hard work and determination. Brain scans have revealed that effort does lead to growth in intelligence and enhancement of initial talent over time. People with this mindset have a love of learning and demonstrate greater resilience. Success at work—and in life—depends on having a growth mindset.

Mindfulness is about adopting a growth mindset. Mindfulness is about giving attention to the present moment and not judging your innate talent or intelligence but instead being open to new possibilities. When you adopt a growth mindset, you expect and move towards life’s challenges, seeing them as opportunities for inner growth. That’s the essence of mindfulness—believing that you can improve and grow with experience, moving towards challenges, living in the moment, and discovering new things about yourself and others.

4 Steps to adopting a growth mindset

Use the following four steps to develop a growth mindset:

Listen to the voice of a fixed mindset in your head. This is about being mindful of your thoughts when faced with a challenge. Notice if your fixed thoughts cause you to doubt your talents or intelligence or if you react with anxiety or anger when someone offers you feedback.
Notice that you have a choice. You can accept those fixed mindset thoughts or question them. Take a few moments to practice a mindful pause.
Question the fixed mindset attitudes. When your fixed mindset says “What if I fail? I’ll be a failure,” you can ask yourself “Is that true? Most successful people fail. That’s how they learn.” Or if fixed mindset says “What if I can’t do this project? I don’t have the skills,” reply with “Can I be sure I don’t have the skills? In truth, I can only know if I try. And if I don’t have the skills, doing this will help me to learn them.”
Take action on the growth mindset. This will make you face challenges, seeing them as opportunities to grow rather than avoid. Use the above system if you mind starts leaning towards the fixed mindset.
With time and effort, you can adopt a growth rather instead of a fixed mindset, leading to more success and greater personal fulfillment than ever before.

Activity: Pay attention to your mindset

Reflect on your mindset. Do you have a fixed mindset or a growth mindset? What thoughts do you notice having when you're faced with life's challenges? If you have a fixed mindset, challenging your thinking and take action to learn and grow.

To learn more about adopting a growth mindset. contact me to schedule a free phone consultation.

Source: Adapted from an article in Mindful Magazine | https://robertgardnerphd.com

07/15/2024

5 Healthy Ways to Reward Yourself

For many of us, when we think of giving ourselves a treat or a reward, our minds turn to food such as our favorite dessert from the local bakery, or a snowball at the nearest stand. If food doesn't do it for you, you might want to reward yourself with some other activity like buying some new clothes or having a few cocktails.

When we're looking to treat ourselves, it's usually to reward a positive change or meeting a goal we've reached through discipline and consistent effort. While there's nothing wrong with the occasional indulgence, turning to an unhealthy habit to reward good behavior can threaten to undermine your hard work. At the very least, you're taking a step back from developing healthy habits.

If you want to find ways to treat yourself that won't impede your progress, here are five healthy ways you can reward yourself for a job well done.

1. Relax and rejuvenate

There might be no better way to treat yourself than a massage or day spa treatment. Schedule a massage, a facial treatment, or a hot stone massage for relaxation.

2. Get a makeover

For women, a makeover is a great way to celebrate achieving a goal. Get a manicure, a new haircut, or hire a professional makeup artist to create a new look. You can also consult a stylist to help you update your wardrobe.

3. Enjoy some alone time

Some alone time might be just what you need to treat yourself. Take a day off work and plan a "stay-cation" for yourself. Take a bubble bath, find a new podcast to listen to, have a cup of hot tea or coffee while you curl up with a new book, or binge-watch some shows on your streaming service. You can also go out by yourself and enjoy a movie or visit an art gallery.

4. Plan a night out

If spending time with good friends is something you desire, plan a fun night out. Find a restaurant, a festival, concert, or sporting event to attend.

5. Take a day trip

Plan a day trip to a locale you've been meaning to visit. Plan a mountain hike or a visit to a beach or lake and enjoy a swim and a healthy picnic. If you're looking for something more active, consider canoeing, horseback riding, or a bike ride. If something relaxing is more your speed, take a long drive and spend the night out under the stars with a loved one.

Changing out our bad habits for healthier ones takes time and effort. By learning to reward ourselves in a more positive way, we reinforce our newer, better habits while discarding the old habits that held us back.

If you're trying to make positive changes in your life and need guidance and encouragement, please know I'm available to help. Contact me today to schedule a time to talk. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

07/11/2024

Living with Gratitude

Ever notice the feeling of being in an environment filled with good energy. There's something warm, inviting, and open about the experience. There’s a presence of pure, positive energy. This raises the question, in a world seemingly full of negativity, how does this happen? The answer is through gratitude.

Being grateful is a critical part of developing a growth mindset. Gratitude is our inner compass. It helps us overcome self-limiting beliefs; gain a more positive perspective on our life; show ourselves some self-compassion and love; and deal with the many challenges that stand in the way of us reaching our goals.

Gratitude has the power to heal. It inspires us to be more creative and shifts our perspective towards positivity, improving our mood, health, and overall well-being. Gratitude is a force of good—it's an energy and a way of being. Being in a state of gratitude is about embracing this energy and letting it flow through you toward the world.

Learning how to be grateful, in addition to acting with gratitude, can transform our life. When we embody gratitude, we gain a sense of meaning, feel more connected to others, and embrace authenticity and healthy habits.

Activity: Living with more gratitude

Reflect on how you're living. Do you lack positive energy in your life? Do you often have a fixed mindset? Are you regularly caught up in negative thinking?

Over the next week, pay attention to how you're living and make an effort to incorporate gratitude into your life. See what difference you notice this effort having on your sense of peace and happiness.

If you want to learn more about living with gratitude, please do not hesitate to contact me. I welcome the opportunity to help.

Adapted from Five Minute Journal app | https://robertgardnerphd.com

07/07/2024

5 Free Ways to Improve Mental Health

When we talk about our mental health, we're referring to much more than a clinical diagnosis. Your mental health encompasses your entire well-being including mind, body, and spirit. Being mentally healthy means you're better able to manage your emotions as well as your mood. Every day presents its unique challenges, and with a healthy mental state you can face those challenges.

1. Positive affirmations

Repeating an affirmation can help you create a positive mental outlook that will be a driving force in your life. Conduct a Google search on "positive affirmations" and you'll likely find several words and phrases that resonate with you. You can also try searching for something more specific, such as "positive affirmations for women" or "positive affirmations to improve self esteem".

Repeat your phrase or phrases during meditation, either out loud or in your mind. Repeating affirmations or mantras during consistent meditation practices can help you overcome negative self-talk, which can have a positive impact on your mental health.

2. Gratitude

Practicing gratitude will focus your attention towards the positive aspects of your life. By paying attention to what's good, you'll start to notice and appreciate other positive aspects of your life. Gratitude is more than just a feeling; it is a choice. By choosing to be grateful, you can keep your mind distracted from negative thoughts.

3. Eat healthy

Eating healthy is a vital part of positive mental health. Eating a balanced diet of fruits, vegetables, lean protein and whole grains will slowly release energy into your bloodstream, creating a consistent level of energy that won't leave you feeling tired or sluggish. Eating healthy will also provide a mental boost because you'll feel good about your healthy food choices.

4. Sunshine

Sunshine is a great way to boost your mood. Put on some comfortable walking shoes and take a leisurely walk around your neighborhood, or a local park. Exposure to sunlight will help your brain release serotonin which will boost your mood, and help you feel more calm and focused.

5. Get good rest

A good night's sleep is a vital part of a healthy lifestyle. When you're well rested, you're naturally energized. Regular sleep also boosts your immune system as well as your cognitive and mental health.

You have the power to improve your mood. By making some healthy changes to your daily routines, you can develop regular habits that will improve your overall mental well-being.

If you are you having trouble staying positive or managing your moods, consider professional help. In therapy you can find better coping strategies and receive support and guidance to help you live a more balanced life. Contact me today and let's schedule a free phone consultation to talk about ways to improve your mental health. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

07/03/2024

5 Ways to Raise Your Self-Esteem

Low self-esteem is a serious issue for many people, and one that negatively impacts quality of life. Negative feelings of shame, guilt, and unworthiness can begin at a young age and, if not addressed, can potentially lead to serious mental health conditions such as depression and anxiety.

Because low self-esteem can be so damaging, finding ways to feel better about ourselves and our abilities is vital to our well-being.

Here are 5 ways to increase your self-esteem:

1. Quiet that inner critic

Negative self-talk is a common issue for people with low self-esteem. If you’re one of those people whose inner critic is constantly beating them up, it’s important you quiet that voice. Try to replace any negative comments with positive ones. Stop focusing on your weaknesses and instead focus on your strengths and abilities.

2. Stop comparing yourself to others

We are all so unique. Sadly, instead of celebrating what makes us individuals, many of us spend time comparing ourselves to other people. And, should we find we don’t quite measure up to standards set by others, we feel inadequate. Stop comparing yourself to other people and instead concentrate on being the best version of you that you can be.

3. Give up the quest to be perfect

Being human means being imperfect. We all have flaws and we are all works in progress. And that’s okay. Striving to be something that simply doesn’t exist is futile and exhausting. Stop trying to be perfect and instead set attainable goals for yourself.

4. Start loving your body

Many people struggle with body image issues. In today's social media world, it’s hard to love your body when you are expected to look like the people that grace the covers of magazines.

Instead of focusing on what your body looks like, on how much you weigh, or how big your muscles are, focus on being healthy. Be grateful for your health and make healthy choices so you can accept yourself for who you are.

5. Cut back on social media

Social media has its good points, but it can also set unrealistic expectations regarding relationships and lifestyles. It’s important to remember that online, people tend to only post images that make their lives seem awesome. But that’s not always an accurate presentation. Spending too much time looking at other people leading fun lives can get in the way of us spending time enjoying our own.

If self-esteem issues have become a serious problem in your life, leading to anxiety and depression, consider working with a therapist. I would be happy to speak with you about how therapy can help, so contact me today. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

06/29/2024

Exploring Self-Esteem

What is self-esteem? Self-esteem is about self-worth. When people are said to have high self-esteem, they believe they have worth as a human being. In contrast, people with low self-esteem believe that they are not worth much. How can we objectively evaluate the worth of something so complicated as a human being? Is that even possible? The answer is no. Yet, most of us are constantly evaluating our worth as a human being.

How do we determine our worth?

Typically, we evaluate ourselves against all kinds of different standards. For some people, these standards are mostly related to appearance (e.g., “I should look attractive”), whereas for others, they are related to achievements (e.g., “I should perform well at work”). Whatever standard is being used to evaluate ourselves against, the idea is always the same: if we feel we are living up to the standard, we are worthy. Self-esteem is high in such cases. However, if we feel that we are not reaching some personal standard, our self-esteem may drop. If you hold a personal standard about high achievement at work, receiving negative performance feedback may cause you to feel bad about yourself as if you are somehow “less,” worthy, and your self-esteem will likely drop.

Hence, self-esteem is all about self-evaluation. A person who is said to have high self-esteem evaluates him or herself against different standards, and when this evaluation turns out favorably, he feels worthwhile. It is like an if-then code of a computer program: If I meet [insert standard here], I am worthwhile. Note that there is nothing wrong with evaluating actions. By evaluating our actions, we can learn from our mistakes and grow as an individual. However, there is a difference between evaluating actions and evaluating personal worth.

Activity: Reflecting on my perceived worth

In this activity, explore what occurs when you evaluate your self-worth. Look at the questions below. Choose five or more questions and try to answer them truthfully. Don't overthink this. Just pay attention to what comes to mind first.

When do I feel most insecure?
In what areas am I most critical of myself?
Have there been situations in which I was pretending to be someone I'm not so others would like and accept me? If so, describe these situations.
What kind of judgments from other people make me feel the worst about myself?
What kind of feedback from others makes me feel as if there is something wrong with me?
When do I feel less compared to others?
What is the thing I fear the most that people would say of me?
When do I experience the feeling of not being enough?
In which situations do I tend to compare myself with others?
When do I feel like my sense of self-worth increases?
When do I feel worthwhile?
When do I feel like my sense of self-worth decreases?
When do I feel worthless?

If you are struggling with self-esteem and would like to explore this topic in therapy, contact me for a free phone consultation. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

06/25/2024

Silence Your Inner Critic

Every single human being has two voices battling it out inside their head. The one voice is our champion, encouraging us to feel confident and to reach our fullest potential.

Then there’s that other voice that is critical of every move we make. This is our inner critic and it examines our perceived flaws under a microscope and brings them to our attention. This voice tells us we can’t do anything right and we’ll never amount to anything.

Now ask yourself, which voice is doing the most talking in your life? If you’re like most people, your inner critic is the loudest and getting your attention the most. Ever wish you could tell it to just shut up?

Here are some powerful ways you can silence your inner critic once and for all:

Be more mindful

In order to silence your inner critic, you must first become aware of it. You cannot change what you are not aware of, right? And this is where mindful meditation comes in.

When we practice being mindful, we tune into the here and now and become FULLY aware of the present. The more you practice mindfulness, the more aware you will be when that negative voice inside you begins to speak.

In addition, mindfulness teaches us that we are not our thoughts, we are the observer of them. Soon you will begin to choose which thoughts to focus on more carefully. This is a powerful shift that can change your life!

Stop comparing yourself to others

In a world where 24/7 social media would have us believe that everyone else is smarter, thinner, richer, and generally better than we are, it’s hard not to compare ourselves to others. But doing so only gives your inner critic ammunition to use against you.

Practice self-compassion

You would never treat others the way you often treat yourself. Begin to treat yourself with the compassion you would someone else. No one is perfect. But we are all worthy of love, kindness, and respect. Start showing yourself more love, kindness, and respect everyday. And you can do this by practicing self-compassion.

Activity: Confronting your inner critic

Develop a regular meditation practice that promotes mindfulness. Being mindful of when you are self-critical, how often does this happen in any given day?
Pay attention to when you compare yourself to other people. What can you do instead in those moments?
Saying something nice to yourself about yourself is a demonstration of self-compassion. What can you say regularly (e.g., "I did that well.") that represents you being kinder to yourself?

Hopefully these tips help you to silence your inner critic. If you’d like more help on building your confidence and self-esteem, please get in contact with me. I work to empower my clients to become the best version of themselves and have the life they want. | https://robertgardnerphd.com

Robert Gardner, Ph.D., Psychotherapy

08/08/2024

08/04/2024

07/31/2024

07/27/2024

07/23/2024

07/19/2024

07/15/2024

07/11/2024

07/07/2024

07/03/2024

06/29/2024

06/25/2024

Address

Opening Hours

Website

Alerts

Contact The Practice

Shortcuts

Share

Category

Monday	9am - 5pm
Tuesday	9am - 5pm
Wednesday	9am - 5pm
Thursday	9am - 5pm