09/03/2025
What creates the avoidant attachment style?
Avoidant attachment is sometimes referred to as the mother wound because it often traces back to the earliest relationship we had—the one with our primary caregiver, usually our mother who in her healthy femininity brings emotional closeness and comfort.
When a child’s emotional needs for safety, comfort, or connection are not consistently met, the child learns a survival strategy:
• “Don’t rely on others.”
• “Take care of yourself.”
•. “Showing emotion brings pain.”
• “Stay strong, stay distant, stay in control.”
This creates the avoidant attachment style. On the surface, it looks like independence, discipline, or emotional self-reliance. But underneath, it’s often a deep fear of vulnerability and a belief that closeness will only lead to disappointment or rejection.
Calling this dynamic a mother wound is not about blame—it’s about awareness. Understanding the roots of avoidant attachment helps us see that what we thought was just “who we are” is actually a learned adaptation. And what was learned can be unlearned. You can move to a more secure attachment style which will bring you more deeper connections, fulfillment, and purpose.
Healing starts with:
✨ Noticing where we shut down emotionally
✨ Practicing safe vulnerability
✨ Learning to trust connection without losing ourselves
Your story doesn’t end with the wound—you can choose healing, resilience, and new patterns of closeness.
“If you’re ready to take your health and performance to the next level, hit that follow button for more tips!”
