B-Fit LLC

03/17/2026

“Find a purpose. Stay engaged. Keep the lights on.”

This piece is a tribute to my father—a gifted jazz drummer, hard worker, and good man—who taught me the importance of purpose and staying engaged in life. Watching him slowly step away from what gave him meaning showed me how easy it is to drift when purpose is lost. His life, and a song by Bill...

03/15/2026

This is my dad.



He was a cool guy—and I’m going to brag on him for a minute.



He was a jazz musician, entrepreneur, handyman, convenience store owner, military man, and so much more.



He had the deepest voice.



And he was strong like you wouldn’t believe.



Shaking his hand was like shaking hands with a catcher’s mitt.



More than anything, he was a good man.



He taught me to work hard and always do the right thing.



He already had a full life before he met my mom, and he brought four kids who weren’t his from another country to be a father to them.



No small task.



He came out of retirement to do this, and we struggled financially—but he did all he could.



He worked during the day and played music on the weekends.



And I’m not just saying this—my dad was one of the best jazz drummers in the business.



He had a touch on the drums that was unbelievable.



He was discovered as a kid, banging on buckets.



From there, he played with some of the top jazz musicians of his time.



Eventually, he retired and moved to Las Vegas.



Before that, when we lived together in New Jersey, he played regularly in Atlantic City.



As he got older, I saw him less and less—him living out west and me on the East Coast.



When I did visit, most of the times he’d just sit and watch TV.



He played some when he first got to Vegas, but eventually he stopped. I was concerned. He was gaining weight, and his health wasn’t great.



I spoke to him a few times about playing drums again.



He’d just say, “I don’t feel like dragging those things up there and back.”



I wasn’t good at arguing with him—but I wish I had done it more.

Continue reading here:
https://bertastacio.com/keeping-the-lights-on/

03/08/2026

What I Told My Kids About S*x, Drinking and Discipline

"Hey, stop cursing.”

“Wait to be physical with the opposite sex.”

“Stay away from alcohol and drugs.”

These were things I shared constantly with my children—and still do.

I didn’t just tell them what to do; I explained why it mattered and modeled it.

Still, I often felt like I was lecturing. I didn’t know if I was getting through.

Then one day, something clicked, and I realized this has everything to do with what it means to be truly healthy.

So, I asked them a different question.

Is it hard to curse—or hard not to?

Is it hard to have sex—or hard not to?

Is it hard to drink—or hard not to?

They agreed: it’s hard not to do these things.

“Exactly,” I said.

Almost everything that will truly benefit your life in the long run is hard not to do.

"And if you follow what's hard...you will find the right path and create the best things."

A father reflects on the advice he repeatedly gave his children—avoid cursing, wait to be physical in relationships, and stay away from alcohol and drugs. At first, it felt like lecturing. But eventually he realized these conversations were about something deeper: teaching them that almost everyth...

03/03/2026

Look who decided to workout with us today?
He jumped up there by himself.
I don’t understand this dog. 🐶 😂

03/01/2026

Finding Peace When We Are at War
I woke up this morning to the news that we’ve entered a war with Iran, and my mind started to spiral.

I’m sure many others did too, which is why I wanted to address it here.

So what can we do?

What would I suggest to a client who’s feeling anxious or afraid?

The first thing I’d say is this: that reaction is normal.

It means you care about your life and about what’s happening in the world.

The second question is: what can you control?

Is there any action you can take?

If there is—take it.

That might mean calling your congressman, offering a prayer, or simply holding the people involved with care and intention.

The last thing I’d suggest is doing something to restore your energy and calm yourself.

Who are the people you can talk to?

What are the things that give you the most peace?

Do those things. Reach out to those people.

And stop doing the things that burden your heart.

Yes, that could mean refraining from the news for a while.

Worrying doesn’t help—but changing your energy does.

And to change your energy, we have to take action.

Facing something as anxiety-provoking as war isn’t easy.

But these events will continue to happen in the external world.

We don’t have much control over that.

What we do have control over is ourselves—and that, believe it or not, is the real world.

There was a song I used to listen to with the kids at church when they were younger:



When there is light in the soul, there is beauty in the person.

When there is beauty in the person, there is harmony in the home.

When there is harmony in the home, there is order in the nation.

When there is order in the nation, there is peace in the world.



Notice where the song starts: light in the soul.

The good news is, we all have that light. It comes with being alive.

From that light, we can choose beautiful thoughts.

From beautiful thoughts, we create harmony in our homes.

And that’s how peace actually spreads.

We don’t start with peace in the world.

We create it in ourselves.

In times of global conflict, fear and anxiety are natural responses. This reflection offers a grounded reminder that while we can’t control the external world, we can choose peace within ourselves—and from there, create real and lasting change.

02/27/2026

Life doesn’t happen to you.
You happen to life.

Alan Cohen

02/22/2026

Party Girl, Bad Boy, Nice Guy vs Real Men and Women
Do you ever wonder how people who are grown up seem to make childish or irresponsible choices?



This can happen to anyone including ourselves. Look at the Epstein files for instance, how did grown adults behave this way?



One of the ways I went looking for that answer was through reading—and one book in particular gave me language for how this happens.



It described three common ways people adapt to growing up without what they needed for their emotional growth.



The tough guy
The nice guy
The party guy



To make it simpler, I’ll use tough girl, nice guy, and party girl.



The tough girl learns to protect herself by not letting anyone in.



The nice guy learns to please, slowly erasing his own needs.



The party girl looks for relief through fun, pleasure, and distraction—until she loses herself in it.



These patterns aren’t moral failures.



They’re unconscious survival strategies.



When we don’t know another way, protection is what we choose.



The problem is that none of them allow us to live from the heart.



They don’t reveal who we are—they cover it up.



Once I became conscious of these patterns, I started seeing them everywhere—in myself and in the people around me.



That’s when something else began to stand out.



We use phrases like bad boy, nice guy, or party girl all the time, rarely questioning them.



I once heard a woman refer to a man she had an exclusively sexual relationship with as a “sex boy.”(I changed what she said slightly for the sake of the reader).



What struck me was this: all of these labels use boy or girl—not man or woman.

What is a healthy adult vs a dysfunctional one? This blog describes not only what's dysfunctional but what and why being a real man and women really means and its value.

02/21/2026

“ Make each day your masterpiece.”
John Wooden

02/19/2026

“We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same.”
Carlos Castaneda

02/14/2026

The Funbuster: A Valentine’s Day Story ❤️

Here's a real love story for Valentine’s Day.



They were having marital problems.



He wanted to save money.



She wanted to spend it.



Someone recommended me to them, and I think they both trusted me because they could tell I didn’t have an agenda.



I didn’t.



I was simply trying to help them communicate and get to the bottom of what they each truly wanted.



Nothing was wrong with either of their needs—except that they had lost balance.



They were overextended financially.



No retirement savings.

No college fund.



She had also just taken a lower-paying job because of stress.



She wasn’t being difficult.



It was hard for her to see why she should hold back on experiences with her kids and family—experiences that required money.



If I remember correctly, she even called her husband a “fun buster.”

A couple conflict over money becomes a lesson in balance, showing how joy and restraint need each other. By listening with respect and purpose, they discover a path that serves not just the moment, but their shared future.

02/08/2026

The Epstein Files: A Father's Reflection
This week, the release of the Epstein files led to a conversation I never expected to have—one with my son.

As he asked questions, I felt a quiet sadness rise in me.

How is it that I even need to explain to this young man—who means so much to me—that such things exist in our world?

I was trying to stay informed, so I began researching—and then I stopped.

It was too much. I know my limits.

That pause led me to an important question:

How do we stay informed and act as responsible members of our community without subjecting our minds to things that distort us?

Here’s what came to me.

I don’t believe we live in a perfect world, or that there aren’t people who do horrible things.

Ignoring that would be irresponsible—and can even perpetuate the very harm we claim to oppose.

At the same time, I also know that what took place here does not represent the average human being.

I’m not interested in studying how low the human race can go, but quite the opposite—who we can become.

The fact that this crosses political and cultural lines keep us from pointing fingers and maybe helps us to truly address what happened here.

What I told my son about facing a broken world without losing our hearts.

02/03/2026

“The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow or love.” ― Leo Buscaglia

A friend asked why I write and share such personal things. Very simple because it can help someone and it's what I love to do. Read this story to understand what it takes to really live well and with purpose.