05/14/2026
“Someday I’m going to bring a third baby home and I want you to be there to do it with me.”
If you’ve got time for a powerful rollercoaster of victory, hardship & overcoming today, strap in and get your tissues ready.
⛈️🌈⛈️🌈⛈️🌈⛈️🌈⛈️🌈⛈️🌈⛈️🌈⛈️🌈⛈️
When she first reached out to me almost 2 years ago, client told me the story of how she had been forged into a fierce advocate through 3 very different births.
BABY 1️⃣
She told me about a cesarean at 8cm for “failure to progress” with her first.
BABY 2️⃣
How a 38% score on the VBAC calculator gave way to a 4 hour unmedicated birth next time.
How she was sent down to La Crosse and “treated like a number” because her local hospital did not offer VBAC.
How the fear was worse than the pain, and after experiencing a natural birth, as the cliche goes, she knew she could do anything.
BABY 3️⃣
In 2024 client and her husband became pregnant again for a third time. Overjoyed, client began prenatal care with her local family doc and looked forward with excitment to another VBAC.
When the issue of transferring care came up, she told her doctor, “I’ve already proven I can do this. I’m not going back there.”
Instead client asked, “What happens if I just show up here and decline a c-section?” Her doctor explained that typically she would be transferred elsewhere by ambulance due to their policy against VBAC.
Client pushed back: “and what happens if I decline to be transferred?”
Her doctor smiled at her, and from there, they had an understanding.
About her rights.
About the safety of VBAC as a legitimate option regardless of geography.
About access to the full spectrum of birth choices within your own local community.
But at 21 weeks during the anatomy scan…client and her husband received devastating news.
Their third baby, and first boy, had developed without kidneys, had no amniotic fluid, and showed other heart & brain abnormalities not compatible with life.
They could carry him to term (or when his heart stopped beating, whichever came first). Or they could end the pregnancy on medical grounds.
After seeking a second opinion from an MFM to confirm the diagnosis, and wracked with crippling worry that every move she made was crushing her tiny baby with no fluid…
Client and her husband made the heartbreaking decision “out of love for this baby and concern for my mental health” to induce labor and end their pregnancy.
And again, for the second time, client was told, “we can’t care for you here. At 22 weeks you will need to travel out of state to deliver.”
A conservative her whole life, client was crushed and angered to learn that abortion restrictions prevented her from having this baby with her own care team in her own local hospital.
So again; just like with her VBAC— they were made to pack up and leave.
This time to experience the most painful thing a parent can endure, in an unfamiliar place far from home, with a team of strangers thanks to politics and geography.
When their baby was born, they named him Nolan, and on the first anniversary of his birth and death, client and her daughters delivered a special gift basket to their local hospital.
The same one that she twice could not deliver at.
“To be given to the first baby boy born that day” in Nolan’s memory.
BABY 4️⃣
At the time we met, client was carrying her 4th— her rainbow baby.
Anxiously waiting to make it past 23 weeks.
Still raw from losing Nolan, but hopeful.
Still passionate about VBACing in her own community, and planning to do so with her doctor’s blessing.
“I’m going to bring a 3rd baby home, and I want you to do it with me.”
There was a brief scare at the anatomy scan when this baby was found to only have one kidney.
But after an MFM consult, client and her husband were reassured that this was not the same diagnosis Nolan had. That this baby could live a long and full life with only one kidney, and was otherwise developing normally.
They breathed a sigh of relief.
Slowly, cautiously, as the days turned into weeks, they began believing that they would meet this baby.
But it was not to be 💔
A few weeks later, after noticing baby wasn’t moving as much, client again found herself staring at an ultrasound screen, as her world caved in around her for a second time.
Reliving that all too familiar, surreal experience.
This baby, too, was gone.
Stillborn at 23 weeks, the exact same gestation they said hello and goodbye to Nolan.
Again, she found herself facing an induction to deliver a non-viable baby.
But this time…
They were surrounded by the same doctor, nurses and ultrasound techs who had been with them as they received Nolan’s devastating diagnosis.
Who cried with them and held her hand as she was given her options.
Who grieved with her.
Who held vigil for her as she was sent away to Rochester.
Who received her back with open arms when she returned home postpartum with no baby.
“The local community and care team matters so much,” she told me. “I’m so grateful I can deliver at my local hospital with my own doctors and nurses this time. It really makes all the difference.”
When this baby was born, they named her Katie. Client told me “she had the same little button nose as Nolan and our 2 other girls.”
“I know we have the tools now from last time to get through this. But I’m scared we may never meet our rainbow.”
⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️⛈️
BABY 5️⃣
Well, in early 2026 client contacted me again…they were tenantively expecting.
Waiting with bated breath to make it to 24 weeks.
Everything had been normal at the anatomy scan, but the anxiety was heavy.
Could she contact me to book once she passed a milestone that felt safe?
Well…. Everything was perfect and normal and she made it to term 😁
“I really want to be connected to this experience,” she told me. “If I’m offered a mirror during pushing I want to lean in, not automatically reject it like last time. I need you to help me not be scared of the intensity.”
So that became our plan.
This time; prodromal labor set in.
After both of her live births beginning with the VERY clear signal of water breaking followed by labor starting immediately, experiencing weeks of contractions was new, different and challenging.
At 38+2, client was 4cm in clinic. Based on both her daughters coming spontaneously between 38-39 weeks, she elected a sweep and not long thereafter, following an afternoon of increased contractions, walked confidently into the hospital radiating pure BUSINESS 😅
She was welcomed on L&D by nurses she had known for years, who were friends as well as providers. The same family doctor who had been with her through each prior pregnancy and loss. Who had agreed to make an exception to the hospital’s VBAC policy, advocated for her to receive the full spectrum of loss options, and arranged to have anesthesia come in just for her.
It was clear this was not just a care team.
This was a village, a community; a set of longstanding relationships. This was a family.
Walking into her L&D room felt like a celebration and we hadn’t even gotten started yet🤣
She was ceremoniously handed a clipboard with a form to sign declining to be prepped for a repeat cesarean or transfer. She smiled big as I snapped a photo.
The nurses and doctor were SO happy and excited and supportive, you would have literally never known we were in a hospital with a vbac ban.
And from there labor began….
Client was 6cm on admission, then an easy 8 after waters released.
She swayed and breathed quietly as contractions built. Changing positions seamlessly, so composed I could barely tell when a contraction would come. We all marveled at how efficiently and easily her body labored, especially for someone who had been so heavily discouraged from VBACing and originally assigned 38% odds.
Before long, she was feeling pushy with only a cervical lip remaining. Daylight beamed in through the windows, shining gloriously and dousing everything in a beautiful golden afternoon glow as if the universe knew what a special day this was.
Some nitrous, hands & knees, lunges and cold cloths later, client was 10. The most graceful, peaceful, connected labor.
Only as pushing began did I perceive any effort or discomfort from client. Just like we talked about, she went STRAIGHT into the center of every push, not backing away, touching her baby’s head when offered, taking strength & motivation from what she felt, not running from it.
The anticipation in the room was palpable. So many years, so much heartbreak, all brought client and her husband to this moment.
Surrounded by the care team and having the birth and the baby they had so longed and fought for.
“Remember when you told me you wanted to bring a third baby home?” I whispered.
Client looked at me with tears in her eyes and nodded as she raised the mask to her face once more. “This is it, go bring this baby home.”
It was intense, but before long, a sweet little 8 pounder twisted her way out with a loud squawk 📣 and the most BEAUTIFUL thick purple cord, announcing without hesitation to an ENTIRE room erupting in cheers, “I’m here! I’m here!”
Dad was able to help catch this baby and announce the surprise gender while everyone in the room wept. “Forever a girl dad!” client chuckled at her husband.
Nurses did all assessments on client’s chest and reassured them she was perfectly healthy while stepping back to allow client and her husband space to take in this sacred moment.
“What happened in that room, it almost felt like a spiritual experience” one of the nurses whispered to me on the way out, as I stopped by the nurse’s station to say goodnight.
As a lawyer I was trained that to drive change, you don’t change hearts & minds. You change laws and policies.
But what I saw in Black River was the opposite.
That relationships, community, and HEART WORK are creating change.
I love every birth, every client, and every story— but this one will always go down as one of the most moving and powerful I’ve had the privilege to be a part of.
Watching an entire community come together to help this family rewrite their story, overcome two back-to-back losses, and VBAC in a VBAC ban hospital…
You don’t see that everyday.
But I saw it on April 30th in Black River.
Happy VBAC & a joyful WELCOME to this long awaited DOUBLE rainbow baby! 🌈 🌈 😭😭
