04/14/2025
Someone asked a question in my Q & A that I felt deserved revisiting for the group. They asked how to make a connection, and maybe because it was the kind of question a student would ask, I answered the way I would teach someone, but I realized it wasn’t sufficient if being posed by someone trying to connect with a loved one.
The truth is, connecting with our loved ones on the other side is easier than you think and it happens frequently, whether we realize it or not. It happens most frequently when we’re not thinking about much, like when driving or enjoying nature, and especially when we think of them. Thinking of them is like a beacon that attracts their specific energy. Have you ever found yourself craving something they may have craved, or having the urge to do things or go places they may have enjoyed or that would prompt some sort of a connection with them, even if only a memory? Do they ever pop into your head randomly, even when nothing prompted you to think about them? These kinds of thoughts and feelings often come directly from spirit! It is their way of nudging us and connecting with us in the physical world.
Make the Intention
If thinking of them is a beacon, speaking to them is like a blow horn. Even when we speak to them silently in our minds and hearts, they hear us, and even when WE don’t feel them, they are often there. Spontaneous connections happen to me most often when I am praying because I am in an authentic and open hearted state of surrender. The first step in making a connection is intention. “Please my beloved/son/sister/mother/friend, I know you are there, I miss you so desperately, I need you, please come to me, be with me” are words I may use when I truly need to feel their prescence. I’ve never had such a heartfelt call go unanswered, even if the answer came in a way or time that I wouldn’t expect.
Shift
In order to feel the presence of spirit, we have to shift our awareness. Just like your sight refocuses when you look from something far away to something near, we have to shift our focus from something seen to something unseen. This part sounds more complicated than it is. It happens naturally when we daydream, many times throughout the day. Repetitive tasks help because they distract our mind and allow spirit to come through. If you don’t know how to consciously shift your awareness, don’t sweat it. Just trust that you’ll get it (if you arent already without realizing it). In the meantime, you can start by playing uplifting, meditative, or beautiful music with your eyes closed. Bonus points if you can focus on the point between your eyes while you do it. It will come to you.
Feel
A connection to spirit isn’t something you think, it’s something you feel. Something that happens. If you feel like you have a connection, you do. When your loved one sends you a sign that makes you think of them and you acknowledge it, you have a connection in that exact moment. How does it feel, when you find that quarter, or see that bird/feather/butterfly/hummingbird/angel number? That feeling is your soul connecting with spirit. Eventually, you’ll be able to tell when you have a connection or not, but in the meantime, trust that it will happen even if you can’t feel it, and know that it probably is happening already, even if you don’t realize it.
The spirit world is not separate from our world. They overlap with each other. They are interconnected. When we enjoy food, music, friendship, art, pleasure, they enjoy it with us. When we sleep, and pray, and drive, they watch over us. When we laugh, cry, mourn, celebrate, and sometimes even when we dream, they do all of those things with us. Our souls are the connection. Our love is the bridge.
