03/07/2019
*****UPDATE******
Hey y’all it’s been a long time since I did lives and all that. Really what it’s come Down to is my confidence is really taking a toll on me. I’ve fallen into what some say is a deep depression since I had my surgery on my SPINAL AVM. As far as my legs, they are still numb from the waist down on my left and from knee down to toes is still numb. I just went and saw surgeon yesterday and they want to go in and do the same procedure over to see if there was something he had maybe missed. I have done what they have said and still do physical therapy 3 times a week. I am getting stronger when walking but as my lady says, it’s painful to watch me walk. So either this can be fixed when they go in or this is it and this is what I have to live with for the rest of my life. Now this is what is getting me so down... It’s like your trapped inside your own body. You want to get up be productive then all of a sudden your ideas fade into the depression and ur body is tired but ur mind is ready to go. I have been to another doctor for my mental stability and was put on some medication that has to get into your system gradually before you feel the affects. I want to be set free from myself and be able to be the parent my children need. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt like myself. On the 22nd I hope I can get some good news and some answers to why I am still not able to feel my legs. I won’t give up and I’ll keep pushing through but I will ask if anyone has any ideas on how to get the anxiety and depression under control I’d appreciate it. Prayers go a long way as well. Thank you guys for the support and kind words. I will get back to the live videos and try to help people along the way of my own journey.. Thank you all!!!
