Allison Davis Maxon, LMFT

12/18/2025

12/18/2025

Frank was already donating to CASA and had watched his wife, Scottie, volunteer for 25 years. When he retired, he knew exactly what to do next — become a CASA volunteer himself. 🌟

“I decided to become a CASA volunteer to give back a little bit since I retired. And I feel that the benefit of having somebody in the court system who looks out solely for the children meant a lot to me. I’ve been very fortunate to do that.”

You can help make stories like Frank’s possible. Support CASA volunteers and children across California by donating today at bit.ly/supportfosteryouth.

12/18/2025

December is National Giving Month, a time to celebrate compassion, generosity, and the simple acts of kindness that strengthen our communities. Dr. Maya Angelou believed deeply in the power of giving — not only materially, but also with love, time, attention, and care.

In her poem “Continue,” she reminds us: “Continue to be who and how you are, To astonish a mean world, With your acts of kindness”

Her words call us to recognize that giving is not limited to grand gestures. It lives in how we show up for others, how we speak life into one another, and how we carry hope into the spaces that need it most.

This month, we honor every person who gives — formally or quietly, publicly or behind the scenes. Your generosity uplifts, restores, and reminds us that we are more alike than unalike.

May we continue to give with open hearts and open hands, just as Dr. Angelou taught.

12/18/2025

Connection Is the Starting Point

This quote speaks to a core truth often misunderstood in parenting and education: connection is not something a young person earns through compliance. It is the condition that allows their nervous system to settle enough to access self-control, problem-solving, and resilience.

Why Withholding Connection Backfires

When a child is dysregulated or struggling, their brain shifts into survival mode. Removing warmth or relational contact in these moments doesn’t teach them to behave better — it intensifies the alarm in their system. The part of the brain needed for learning from mistakes shuts down when connection is withdrawn.

Behaviour Is a Signal, Not a Test

A child’s behaviour is rarely a measure of respect. More often, it is a signal of unmet needs, overwhelm, or lagging skills. Viewing behaviour through a brain-based lens helps adults shift from “How do I make them stop?” to “What support does their nervous system need right now?”

Connection Restores Regulation

A calm adult presence is one of the most powerful tools we have. Eye contact that reassures, a steady tone, a gentle moment of attunement — these are the interventions that help a child’s stress response deactivate. When they feel connected, regulation becomes possible again.

Relationship Before Correction

Setting boundaries with warmth creates dramatically better outcomes than withdrawing affection until a child ‘earns’ it back. Discipline is about teaching, not punishing. And children learn best from adults they feel anchored to, not those they fear losing connection with.

For Those Wanting Tools Rooted in Brain Science
If you’d like practical, compassionate strategies to build regulation, reduce overwhelm, and strengthen connection at home or in school, explore our full range of toolkits.
Link in comments below ⬇️ or via Linktree Shop in Bio.

12/18/2025

Sit with the parents who are healing;
the conversation is different.

They’re not interested in pretending everything is fine.
They’re not chasing perfection or image.
They’re asking the real questions —
about triggers,
about emotional safety,
about what their children actually need instead of what they were taught to deliver.

They speak in honesty, not performance.
In reflection, not defensiveness.
In accountability, not blame.

They’re the ones pausing before reacting,
questioning old instincts,
unlearning what hurt them,
and choosing what heals instead.

They talk about things their own parents may never have had language for —
boundaries,
repair,
emotional literacy,
self-worth,
connection over compliance.

And when you sit with them,
you feel the difference:
less judgement,
more compassion.
Less “this is how it’s done,”
more “this is what I’m learning.”

Parents who are healing don’t raise their voices to prove they’re in control —
they raise their awareness to change the story.

The conversation is different
because they are different.
And that difference is exactly how generational cycles break. ❤️

12/18/2025

What is compassion fatigue and why is it important to recognize for resource parents? Read this insightful article, "What is Compassion Fatigue?" from Alisha Gallagher in our upcoming January edition of Fostering Families Today.

12/18/2025

The holiday season is an exciting time, but it can also bring a mix of emotions for kids in foster care. Here are a few reminders to keep in mind:

1️⃣ Holidays can bring mixed emotions. Joy and sadness may coexist. 🩵

2️⃣ Traditions might be new or overwhelming. Take it slow and make space for adjustment if needed. 🎁

3️⃣ Keep your expectations flexible. Every child will experience the holidays differently. 🤲

4️⃣ Be mindful of potential triggers. 🚨

5️⃣ Hold space for their feelings. 💬

6️⃣ Involve them in holiday planning. 🎄

12/12/2025

When we feel a child is doing something “just to get attention,”
the response is simple:
let’s give them some attention.

Because attention isn’t a flaw.
It’s a basic human need.

It’s how children say, “I’m overwhelmed,”
“I need connection,”
or “I don’t know how to hold this alone.”

We forget that adults seek attention too —
we just do it in more socially acceptable ways.
We call a friend, vent, ask for support, lean on someone.

Children ask in the only ways they know how.

So instead of labelling the behaviour as manipulation, we can choose to see it as communication.

A bid for closeness.
A signal that something inside them needs anchoring.

Attention doesn’t spoil a child. Disconnection does. Meeting their need now teaches them how to ask for help later…

With words instead of outbursts,
with trust instead of fear,
with openness instead of shame.

If a child is asking for attention, the most loving thing we can do is notice and draw them closer. ❤️

Quote Credit: ❣️

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12/12/2025

After more than 25 years of pioneering this work, C.A.S.E. is proud to release two landmark research reports that provide the strongest evidence to date that adoption-competent mental health services deliver measurably better outcomes for adoptive families—and that far too few families can access them.

With this data, we are calling on policy makers, states, systems, and providers to adopt national standards for adoption-competent mental health care, invest in training and credentialing, and expand public access to directories of qualified clinicians.

To read the survey and research report in full, visit our website: adoptionsupport.org/stateofpractice