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The Shift Coaching, Consulting & Advocacy

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Moorhead, MN
The Shift Coaching, Consulting & Advocacy

Empowering People. Transforming Systems. Coaching, consulting & advocacy rooted in emotional intelligence, innovation and individualized support.

Bridging gaps between people and the systems meant to serve them. At The Shift, we challenge the status quo with empathy, strategy and bold thinking. Lacey Tougas, RN, NC-BC, empowers individuals and families, while also supporting organizations that want to lead with purpose. From coaching adolescents and moms to consulting for healthcare and education systems, she designs individualized solutions that meet people where they are. Services include:
- 1:1 & Group Coaching
- Intuitive or Educational Workshops
- Leadership & Team Training
- Burnout Support & Systemic Strategy
- Advocacy for Law Enforcement Families, Educators, Caregivers & More

Every package is customized. Every person is seen. Every system can shift.

➤ Rooted in Emotional Intelligence
➤ Built on a Solution-Focused Mindset
➤ Serving both people & the systems they’re in

03/04/2026

Let’s normalize something: chaos usually means life is actually being lived.

Not every home with kids looks calm and perfectly organized.

Sometimes it looks like:

Cold coffee.
Dishes everywhere.
Laundry multiplying overnight.
Someone crying.
Someone laughing.
Someone asking for snacks for the 47th time.

And a mom in the middle of it all just trying to keep things moving.

That doesn’t mean you’re failing.

It means life is happening here.

A messy house with kids in it
is evidence of a life being lived —
not a life being failed.

So if today your biggest accomplishments were:

• keeping everyone alive
• feeding them something
• making it through the chaos
• and trying again tomorrow

That counts.

Lower the bar sometimes.

Because survival days still build strong families.

That 1% more effort you showed today than yesterday? While it may not seem like it accomplished anything, it’s better than 0%. (And if you wouldn’t have given that 1% things would feel even more overwhelming now) 😂

And if you’re an ADHD mom doing this on hard mode?

That’s Olympic-level.

ReframeMindset

03/02/2026

When stress goes up, sleep falls apart.

This is a cycle I tend to go through — and if you do too, keep reading.

Honestly, sleep is something I have always struggled with.
Falling asleep can be hard. Staying asleep can be hard. And a lot of mornings I wake up feeling like I barely rested at all (making it hard to get up).

Between stress, ADHD, and a brain that seems to run all night (plus very loud dreams), sleep doesn’t always come easy.

And I feel it the next day.

My mood is shorter.
Parenting feels harder.
My focus is worse.
Little things feel bigger.
Work takes more effort.
Stress feels heavier.
I feel more burned out.
I get more emotional.
Do you see the snowball effect yet?

Poor sleep makes everything in life feel harder… and then life being harder makes sleep worse.

Then comes the guilt-train...

Guilt that I didn’t get everything done.
Guilt that I didn’t play that game with the kids.
Guilt that I didn’t prep snacks or dinner for the next day.
(If I even had a penny for how often I hear these things...)

Sometimes we just need to take a deep breath.

How much of this is not getting good sleep… and how much of it is the pressure we put on ourselves to be superwoman?

Spoiler alert! You're only one person. And you need to take care of yourself too!

What’s one of the simplest things we can do that has the biggest impact on our sleep and wellbeing?

MOVEMENT.
We're talking any movement!

Walk 45 minutes a few times a week. It doesn’t have to be fast; you should be able to hold a conversation.

Yoga.
Pilates.
Strength Training.
Walk the dog.
Stretch on the living room floor!

Whatever it is, just move your body regularly!

Movement is one of the quickest chemical changes and nervous system resets you can create. Lower your stress hormone (cortisol). Give yourself a "calm/feel-good" boost (dopamine/serotonin). Regulate your nervous system (endocannabinoids).

And THAT improves your sleep. (99 times out of 100, everything improves for me after movement!)

Which changes your next day.
Your next week.
Your whole wellbeing.

Now getting back to simplicity- What movement can/WILL you do today to improve your sleep?
(my response in comments)

01/18/2026

When you stop chasing symptoms…
everything changes.

This was never about weight.
It was about inflammation, GI stress, immune activation, bloating and nervous system overload.
Instead of reacting to every symptom, we addressed why the body was responding the way it was — with individualized, realistic support.

The body didn’t need discipline. It needed direction.

Root cause > symptoms.

If this resonates, you’re not imagining things — your body is communicating, listen to it and reach out for direction.

12/26/2025

Merry Christmas 🎄🤍

So incredibly thankful for my kids…
even though they’re currently driving me all the way up the 9-ft Christmas tree 😅

Regulating like a pro with my AirPods in, noise canceling on, choosing connection over correction (because jail doesn’t hit me as festive this evening).

Tomorrow? We regulate.
Structure + routine = safety (for kids and adults)

If things felt a little unhinged at your house too — you’re not alone.
That’s the holidays, lean into the chaos instead of fighting- mindset matters most!

Hope everyone survived and had a wonderful Christmas ❤️

12/18/2025

Our kids with ADHD?
Their brains are already three steps ahead
while we’re still finishing the sentence.

They process information faster, broader, and deeper—
which is exactly why the “standard way” of learning loses them.

These kids don’t need to be slowed down.
They need us to build them a different path.

Meet their brains where they are, keep them engaged,
and watch how quickly they can actually learn. I’ll let you in on something, it’s often much faster than the average kid. 💡🧠🤯

Different wiring. Big brilliance. ✨

12/14/2025

Pictures say a thousand words, don’t they? 😂

I was diagnosed with ADHD in my early 30’s and it changed everything.
After my diagnosis, I went all in. Therapy (topic for another time). Learning everything about ADHD (because let’s be honest… the hyperfocus showed up hard 😅). Suddenly, my life made sense. The overwhelm. The patterns. The strengths. The struggles. None of it was a personal failure, that I was led to believe my whole life, I was just wired differently.

Then something bigger clicked.

After I finally felt like my life made sense, learned who I was, and finally found some identity in myself, I started looking at my role as a parent through a new lens.
The explosive emotions. The big reactions to small things. The school struggles, teacher’s emails, meetings, constant advocacy and the defiance, OH the defiance! 😤

And then the light went on-
💡My kids have ADHD too… and it shows up differently in every single one of them.

That realization changed everything about how I show up—not just as a mom, but as a nurse, a coach, a partner, a friend and an advocate.

Fun Fact:
ADHD is highly hereditary, about 70–80%. So if your kid has it, chances are it didn’t start with them… it just finally got named (Faraone et al., 2021; Thapar et al., 2022). (Articles available upon request!)

My kids will grow up with something I didn’t have: support, language for their experiences, tools for regulation, and someone who will push for them—inside schools, healthcare, and systems that weren’t built with brains like theirs in mind.

We were never meant to fit into a mold.
We’re meant to understand our wiring, honor it, and create a new way forward. It’s actually a superpower and what we should be more focused on with the children of our future.

If any of this sounds familiar, buckle up—I’m about to validate what you’ve been experiencing and help you understand.
Whether you’re navigating this personally, within your family, or in a professional role, I bring both lived experience and formal graduate-level education. This is what I’ve devoted the last five years to understanding, studying, and supporting.

12/02/2025

I didn’t learn regulation techniques from a course.
I learned them in the middle of my daughter’s medical crisis — in real time — because I had to.

When her nervous system was spiraling, mine couldn’t.
If I didn’t regulate myself, she wasn’t going to regulate either.

So I learned on the spot.

I learned to steady my breath when fear hit my chest.
I learned grounding because breaking down wasn’t an option.
I learned how to calm my body so she could feel safe enough to calm hers.

Not from a book.
Not from a classroom.
From life demanding that I rise.

And when the crisis finally ended… I wasn’t the same.

My body was exhausted.
My heart was bruised.
My mind was full of unprocessed fear.
I was angry.

That is when I found my coaching program — after everything happened.
And I truly believed I was choosing it to help others.

But what I didn’t realize was this:

That coaching program found ME right when I needed it, like divine intervention. Those next 7–8 months were still healing me.

Still teaching me.
Still unraveling the patterns I had been living in for decades.

Coaching didn’t drag me back into the past —
it helped me understand the patterns that had shaped my entire life:
How I reacted to stress.
How I coped.
How I protected myself.
How I shut down or over-functioned.
How I carried responsibility that wasn’t mine.

It showed me my behaviors with honesty and compassion and then taught me how to rewrite them.

It taught me radical self-awareness:
accepting that I’m human,
embracing vulnerability,
and connecting with people in ways I never knew how to before.

Because underneath all of it,
that’s what we’re all longing for —
connection, safety, and to be heard.

Coaching helped me slow down after years of survival mode.
It helped me enjoy the present instead of bracing for the next emergency.
It helped me ground before reacting.
It brought clarity where I used to panic.
It gave me grace for myself — and for life.

And somewhere in that process, I became someone different:
calmer, more regulated, more present, more grounded, more understanding, more patient, … more me.

That’s why I coach now.

Not because it’s trendy.
Not because it’s inspirational.
But because coaching rebuilt me from the inside out —
and I know what these tools can do for someone who’s been carrying more than they can say out loud, I’ve lived it and I’ve physically seen it.

Coaching simply gave me what I needed to become who I am now,
and now I get to help others do the same.

10/20/2025

Some of us grew up believing that who we are depends on how we act.
That love, attention, and connection only came when we were “good.”

But we were never meant to build our identity around behavior.
We were meant to understand the impact of our behavior — on ourselves, others, and the world around us.

If we’d learned that earlier, maybe we’d be more self-aware now.
Maybe we’d pause before reacting, get curious instead of defensive, and remember that we are not our mistakes.

When behavior becomes the measure of worth, we lose the chance to be seen for who we truly are: inherently good, worthy, and lovable.

That space between being misunderstood and wanting to be seen is where shame grows.
And where there’s shame, there’s coping.
Defensiveness. Perfectionism. Avoidance.
All trying to protect something tender underneath.

You are not your worst behavior.
You are not your best behavior.
You are a human — learning, healing, and doing the best you can with what you know.

When we focus on the person instead of the performance, we make space for empathy, curiosity, and real growth.

Your behavior is information, not identity.
Get curious about what it’s trying to tell you. ❤️
👉If this resonates, save it or share it with someone who might need the reminder today.
🧐If you're curious and want help to recognize these patterns, message me!

10/16/2025

What better way to celebrate another trip around the sun than to FINALLY share what I’ve been working on all year! 🧁

After months of planning, visioning, learning and pouring my heart into creating something that can truly make a difference, I want to introduce you to The Shift Coaching, Consulting & Advocacy.

Through The Shift, I help clients navigate new or ongoing health challenges using a structured, holistic approach. I also guide them through insurance and healthcare benefits to ensure they can access the systems they need, and provide trauma-informed coaching, consulting and advocate for both individuals and organizations.

My work spans ADHD, mindset, resilience, leadership and integrative health coaching, all rooted in holistic nursing and emotional intelligence.

This past year has shown me time and time again that I am on the right path, doing exactly what I’m meant to do. Making a true difference. It is a privilege to walk alongside you on your journey and help you thrive.

If you’re curious to learn more or explore how we might work together, send me a message. I would love to connect!

Address

22 6th Street N
Moorhead, MN
56560

Opening Hours

Monday	9am - 4pm
Tuesday	9am - 4pm
Wednesday	9am - 4pm
Thursday	9am - 4pm
Friday	9am - 4pm

Website

https://linktr.ee/Laceytougas

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