10/24/2023
Today is the day I choose to let go of trauma that has been buried deep in my heart. I didn’t even realize I was carrying it. Today is the day I come face-to-face once again with a man who saved my life and my son Logan’s. The story begins with a gynecologist that really knew something was up with my skin. She sent me to a dermatologist the very next day. This dermatologist removed a melanoma and suggested I abort the baby that I was pregnant with. That baby was Logan🏃. He suggested I may have to have chemotherapy right away and I would not be able to carry the baby to term. On our way home, Ian and I discussed what to do. I was convinced I would be fine and the baby would be fine. By the time we got home, the University of Michigan melanoma clinic Had left a message on my voicemail machine. I called them back and they told me not to abort the baby, to come be part of their study. They were studying the effects of melanomas in utero. Ian and I headed down to University of Michigan Not knowing what would happen. The melanoma clinic decided to remove a big section out of my back and lymph nodes in my arm and shoulder. I was confident God had Logan🏃 and I in his tender care. Not once did I waiver, how could I when I had God on my side? Logan was born a healthy, beautiful little boy! I went on to get the OK to have another baby, Grace. My life has been a gift and my children are evidence of what God can do. Today, for the first time, 21 years,since the dermatologist removed my fourth stage melanoma, I will be seeing him. I thank God that he knew enough to remove as much of the margins as he possibly could. Melanomas are a fast growing cancer, especially when one is pregnant. people say to me, without really knowing much about melanomas, “oh it’s just skin cancer.” Well, for me, it was my life. I still have trouble with the nuclear medicine that was used. Forever toxins. Forever affecting my body and my health. I had to have a 6“ x 2“ muscle and skin removal on my back while pregnant. No anesthesia. The details I’m revealing here Are just part of my healing. There’s so much more to the story, as always.I didn’t realize the trauma I had stored in my heart until today. It’s time to face my trauma, where I feel God will be, meeting me at my fear.
Why let go today? Why not today?