06/10/2023
We Show Respect, Rather Than Seek It
Practicing this principle doesnât necessarily mean that others respect us; it means we offer others the respect we wish for ourselves, and that we respect ourselves enough to walk in dignity and quiet strength.
âGuiding Principles, Tradition Eleven, âSpiritual Principlesâ
Tradition Elevenâwhich seems to be about public relations but can be applied to other aspects of recoveryâreminds us that the message of NA is whatâs most important, not the messenger. Respect and anonymity are the keys to deciphering the difference between âattractionâ and âpromotion.â An opportunity to share NAâs message of hope outside the rooms of Narcotics Anonymous is a privilege for any member and a responsibility not to be taken lightly. Whether itâs a public relations activity like speaking to a group of medical professionals, being part of an H&I panel, or helping to explain NA to the family of a sponsee whoâs just relapsed, we must avoid our impulse to make the message about us instead of NA. Rather than seeking respect for ourselves, we show our respect for the programâand for our listenersâby sharing the NA basics or the impact the program has on our lives, while being real about what NA is and what itâs not.
The same can be said for what happens inside the rooms. We keep it real whether weâre talking oneâonâone with a new member, speaking at a meeting (whether small and intimate, or large and spirited), or representing our region at the World Service Conference. These are moments when our recovery is best served by the clarity of our message and the integrity of our role, not by seeking attention or validation. Thereâs no need to make inflated claims about our lives in recovery. And look, if weâre sharing at a huge convention, we will get attention and very likely validation! Thatâs part of the deal. Speaking with genuine humility and gratitude shows respect for NA and preserves our selfârespect, too.
Yes, thatâs the bottom line right there: We show respect, rather than seek it. With that as our goal, we can walk with dignity. Keeping our selfâpromotion in check and leading with attraction enhances our selfârespect.
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Whether itâs public relations, addict relations, or my relationship with myself, today I will strive to show respect rather than to seek it.
