07/13/2024
Adult Meltdowns:
Many of the strategies for dealing with meltdowns in children are similar in adults. However, adults are expected to implement their own strategies, advocate for themselves, and be aware of their own stressors and overload. The strategies for autistic adults need to be a self-management plan rather than one that a parent or teacher designs and implements. So, what was once an external designed plan needs to become a self-managed plan now.
Take Care of Your Nervous System
1. Start with your nervous system! Your nervous system is fragile and more likely to be vulnerable to stress. It is important that you eat well, get regular exercise, and get plenty of sleep. Make sure you don’t skip meals, eat mini snacks, and keep a nutritious diet. Try and give yourself 30 minutes of exercise daily. Exercise is important for regulating your nervous system. And of course, you need plenty of sleep and rest breaks during the day. Since your nervous system is more fragile, it will become easily taxed when hungry or fatigued.
Sensory Overload
2. Autistic adults need to be keenly aware of their tolerance levels to avoid overload. This includes sensory sensitivities, social tolerances, informational overload, and mental energy levels. You need to know what types of stimulation to avoid, how to make modifications, and advocate for accommodations in your work and living settings. Be aware of what sensory stimuli in commonly visited settings are irritating to you, what may overwhelm you, and how you can accommodate and adapt to them. Modify the environment if you can, if not, build in adaptations to cope.
3.. Make your daily settings sensory-friendly. Try and make modifications to your home and work setting (soften lighting, muffle noise, partitioned work area, etc.) to make the environment as sensory-friendly as possible. At home, even if your family will not make modifications, try and make one room of your home sensory-friendly for you to escape to when you need to rebound.
4.. If you are going to new events, try and visit the setting ahead of time, if possible, to check out the setting and evaluate the sensory bombardment you may be entering. This way, you can figure out what accommodations you may need. Plan ahead for all events, and review before going.
5. Keep a sensory “toolbox” (sunglasses, rim hat, gum, earplugs, mp3 player, fidget items, etc.) at home, work, and in your car. Don’t wait until you start to feel stressed to use your accommodations. Always appraise the settings you are in; be proactive and use these accommodations and coping strategies to avoid accumulating stress that will lead to overload.
Social overload
6. Monitor your social demands. For most autistic adults, interacting can be very taxing. So, know what your limits are. For most individuals, interacting one on one with someone you know can go okay for short periods. However, trying to regulate in a group conversation, or navigate a group activity can be very taxing and overwhelming. Try to avoid such activities, or only stay in them for short periods. Know your limits. If you are at parties, try and find the least active area that will minimize the amount of social contact you have. Let people come to you, rather than mingle around the room. That way, you can control the level of interaction you have to regulate.
7. At work, know your physical and social environment well. Group meetings where you must present or interact extensively will be very taxing for you. Try to arrange your social interaction to be brief and familiar to you. Try to avoid the crowded coffee room, cafeteria, and social stops where others may put you on the social hot seat. Try to get an individual office or partitioned work area. Listen to music to block out conversations and background noises.
8. If you are a parent or live with others, you will need to give yourself a spot to get away and regroup. Home should be a safe setting for you to be yourself and meet your sensory, social, and emotional needs so you can regroup for the next day.
Processing Overload
9. Try to avoid work tasks that require a lot of multi-tasking. Try to do one task at a time and break longer tasks into simpler steps. Keep a very organized home and work area; everything has a predetermine spot and keep it there.
10. Develop consistent routines and schedules throughout your day to keep yourself organized and reduce confusion. Map out your day (time and events) and leave yourself plenty of time between events. Many autistic people have a difficult time judging how much time tasks will take. Then they get rushed and anxious, increasing the chances of overload. It assures you complete needed tasks and allows you to relax and regroup between tasks.
11. Remember that your mental energy will drain easily as you move from one task to another. Plan frequent breaks to rebound and re-energize. Again, don’t wait until you feel taxed to take breaks. Proactively schedule infrequent breaks to avoid being taxed and overwhelmed. Once you become tired, your energy drains more quickly, and overload can set in before you have a chance to react.
12. The more taxing the event, the more time you need to rebound and re-energize. If you are going to a highly taxing event, don’t plan a consecutive event immediately afterward. For highly taxing social events (concerts, parties, etc.), you may need to spend the next day doing very little. If you know you are going to go out socially on Friday night, take a good portion of Saturday to regroup.
Escape and Rebound
13. Always have a means of escape if you feel yourself being overloaded. This can be to the bathroom, outside, your car, or a separate area away from the group. It is best if you give yourself these breaks periodically throughout the event to proactively minimize overload. Remember, it is not wise to wait until you start feeling stressed to react. It may be too late!
15. When entering a new setting, map out a means of temporary escape if needed and take breaks to regroup. Also, come late and leave early to avoid overload. Keep a sensory tool with you to help you regroup once you escape.
16. Learn the early signs that your body is telling you that stress is building up. Many autistic adults report poor awareness of their body cues that they are getting stressed. They do not have good self-awareness of their internal states, which tells us that we are starting to get stressed. This is important to be able to pull out of stressful situations before becoming overwhelmed. To effectively avoid meltdowns, you must be aware of when you are in the beginning stages of buildup. There is new work being done with meditation and mindfulness exercises to help adults become more aware of their body sensations as to lower their stress levels.
17. Identify and practice a few relaxation coping skills (deep breathing, positive self-talk, fidget item in the pocket, gum, etc.) to help relax your nervous system while in high-stress settings. Distraction (music, mental tasks, etc.) can help you block out some unwanted stressors.
18. Lastly, when feeling a meltdown coming “escape” as soon as possible. Leaving immediately is important. It is better to flee than act out! Get away and engage in your favorite calming strategies. You can always apologize later. You do not have time to problem solve at that time. Your coping skills are minimal and going quickly. If needed, carry a small card that explains why you are leaving (escaping). You may not have the words to explain. Just get out, escape, and rebound!
I hope some of these suggestions help. Please feel free to share your experiences and add recommendations.
This series on “Shutdowns and Meltdowns” can be found in the blue book, “Autism Discussion Page on the Core Challenges of Autism.”
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_2?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=Bill+Nason
