09/11/2025
‼️Trigger Warning—Mental Illness and Suicide‼️
It’s OK to not feel OK and the studio is our community’s safe space to feel your feelings without Judgements or Expectations. Sometimes a good silent sob in Savasana on the floor under the purple light is what we need 💜
I am writing this post because my heart is heavy over a life I know that was lost this week in our community. Mental illness is a silent bitch. I know because it’s something I live with every day. Certain mental illnesses or diseases are known to manifest in people in their late teens and early 20’s. This was the case for me, as I’m coming up on almost 10 years since I’ve been diagnosed. This isn’t something I’m shy about or try to hide. But I also try not to let it define me. I talk about it when it needs to be talked about.
There were times in my life where I thought I should talk more about it to the general public in case it might help more people open up and live their life with more ease and comfort knowing they’re not alone. But honestly? If you suffer from mental illness or thoughts of su***de, feelings like ease and comfort seem like a pipe dream. And when you talk publicly, you’re also speaking to people who don’t have any of these issues. It can make you feel like you’re being dramatic. Or you get scared because people who thought you were healthy and perfect might look at you differently.
I write this today because when someone dies intentionally, there’s a lot of wonder of how they could do it. Someone said “I just wish everyone knew that nothing is ever that bad. Even if you have to get divorced or go bankrupt or anything, it’s not the end of the world”. I let them know that it’s not always situational. Sometimes when you are mentally sick, you live the best life ever but you have thoughts and body sensations that are telling you a totally different story. Having your brain and body fail you is devastating. I know from experience.
If you know someone who suffers with mental health, just give them a hug and tell them you are so happy that they are here and doing their best.
I’ve created a lifestyle that works with my mental health. Yoga, meditation, medication therapy, diet, cold therapy, living a mostly sober life, and exercise together help me live my life. I highly recommend healthcare professionals who are dedicated to your mental health like my friends and providers at Calamity Rose Ranch . When I thought my illness was managed, my body decided my long time meds don’t need to work anymore. If you’ve ever been on a new medication rollercoaster, you know it’s a special kind of hell on earth. If it wasn’t for my friends, my routine, my family, and my wonderful mental health provider, I would be living under a rock right now. Or worse.
In this transition in my mental health, I’ve put a lot of focus on Brain Training in my yoga practice. Rewiring our brain and nervous system to work with us, instead of against us. Being able to observe sensations and feelings without attaching to them emotionally. Teaching ourselves to be more responsive and less reactive to everything going on around us and within us. The standard person can see the benefits of brain training almost immediately. If you’re like me, this is something you need to practice regularly because with all the brain chemistry imbalance you need to recalibrate your nervous system often. Come to the studio and do it with me. If you want to know how to use yoga, meditation, and sound healing to train your brain and body, shoot me a message. If you can’t come to the studio regularly, maybe we can set up a private class where I can teach you how to do this for yourself at home.
I just want everyone to know that I’ve made it my life’s mission to teach people how to help themselves feel better—on purpose.
I love you all and if you’re still reading, thanks for listening. Go give your friends and family a hug. If you’re the one needing the hug, hug yourself. It seems silly but self compassion, even if it feels forced and fake in the beginning, can really help your nervous system. Tell yourself every day that You are Powerful, You are Capable, and you are Worthy of feeling good, no matter what your circumstances are.
It’s a good day to have a good day if you allow it to be ❤️
