Dr. Laura E Anderson

Dr. Laura E Anderson Coaching, Consulting & Educating around complex and religious trauma

04/09/2026

thank you thank you I’ll be here all week (with boundaries of course 🫡)

04/09/2026

If you’ve been in therapy for years and still feel unwell, that doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re unwinding patterns that were wired into you early and reinforced repeatedly.

04/08/2026

What are some red flags you had to ignore in order to survive?

Idk what Sunday was all about, but I do know that I’ve got some real Good News (No Repentance Required!) for you right h...
04/08/2026

Idk what Sunday was all about, but I do know that I’ve got some real Good News (No Repentance Required!) for you right here 🙏🏼

*all original creators tagged on each slide

Idk what Sunday was all about, but I’ve got some real Good News (No Repentance Required!) for you right here 🙏🏼 *all ori...
04/08/2026

Idk what Sunday was all about, but I’ve got some real Good News (No Repentance Required!) for you right here 🙏🏼

*all original creators tagged on each slide

04/08/2026

Funny because it’s probably true

A lot of conversations about midlife focus almost entirely on hormones. And while hormonal changes are real and importan...
04/08/2026

A lot of conversations about midlife focus almost entirely on hormones. And while hormonal changes are real and important, many women experience something much broader than that.

In my clinical work, I often hear women describe midlife as a time when many layers of life start shifting at once: Their nervous system feels more sensitive… Old trauma or relational patterns resurface… Boundaries become clearer… Relationships change… And their body stops cooperating with the pace they once maintained.

For women who grew up in high-control environments—including many forms of conservative religion—these shifts can feel especially confusing.
Many were taught to distrust their bodies or to override discomfort, or to prioritize obedience, caretaking, or self-sacrifice. So when the body begins asking for something different in midlife, it can feel unfamiliar or even unsettling.

But what I often see is that midlife becomes a stage where many women begin rebuilding a relationship with their bodies—sometimes for the first time. Not through control, but through listening. I’ll be talking more in the coming weeks about the intersection of midlife, trauma, and embodiment. Because for many women, midlife isn’t just a biological transition. It’s a deeply psychological and relational one as well.

Was there something about midlife that surprised you or that no one prepared you for?

A while back I made a post that some people didn’t really care for.Comments were made that disparaged my character and a...
04/08/2026

A while back I made a post that some people didn’t really care for.

Comments were made that disparaged my character and accused me of things that were not actually happening. I am someone who is open to feedback, making amends, and changing when it is warranted–and I’ve also recognized that social media is a place where shape-shifting yourself to meet other people’s preferences only leaves me feeling like a shell of myself.

So, for years I’ve had a boundary that if people are shaming, disparaging, punishing, trolling, or other not-in-good-faith interactions, I do not engage. I check in with my people–the people who I am closest with and can kick me in the butt if I need it–see if there are areas for change and growth and figure out next steps. But I don’t change who I am for people who do not know me.

And y’all, people do not like it.

And though I am actually ok with people not liking my boundaries, responses, or lack of interaction, sometimes it’s hard to navigate knowing that there is a person or people who are uncomfortable or even angry at my boundary.

Part of the healing process is growing in capacity to tolerate others’ discomfort, frustration, and even anger with my boundaries. It’s to learn that my boundaries are not for them–they are for me–and it’s ok to value my well-being over someone else’s preference for how I show up for them.

I’d love to hear your thoughts about this; share below!

04/07/2026

One of the tricks of high control religions, groups, and relationships, is that the way they go about gaining control is subtle and often isn’t even recognized.

I can clearly remember an experience of overt spiritual and psychological abuse–but at the time I was able to discard it as a “one off” or a bizarre occurrence.

Now, however, I can see the subtle, and even not-so-subtle ways I had been groomed to get to a place where instead of recognizing the abuse for what it was, I questioned and doubted myself.

Some of the things I can now see were:
-A robust imbalance between men and women where I had been indoctrinated to believe I couldn’t trust myself and needed to defer to a man for all wisdom and direction
-Placing the pastors at the church–all men–on a pedestal of spiritual power and authority. They were the mouthpiece of God.
-Having my appearance critiqued in order to ensure that I was presenting modestly
-Being told that I had no inherent goodness inside of me, or that I was a dime a dozen and not that special, or that my role as a woman was to be quiet and submissive toward every man in my life as a way to practice for my future husband.

All of this meant that when I sat in my office with a pastor screaming at me, making accusations, and demanding I repent of sinning against him because I dared to push back against his claims… I was already primed to believe that I was deserving of this and that there was nothing wrong with this abuse of power.

I’d venture to say that there are many things we wish we would have known about high control religion, looking back.

What are some of those things for you?

Though most people recognize boundaries to be markers of a healthy relationship or healthy individual, a person with unr...
04/07/2026

Though most people recognize boundaries to be markers of a healthy relationship or healthy individual, a person with unresolved trauma may interpret the setting of a boundary (even a healthy one) as abandonment.

My clientele consists almost entirely of individuals who have complex trauma.
Histories of abandonment, abuse, rejection and overwhelm, causing their bodies and nervous systems to be on high alert in an effort to keep them safe... springing into protective action the moment that a potential threat arises.

Though I am a very relational therapist and often offer various support outside of our sessions, for my own mental health and the safety of my clients, I also must maintain boundaries.

What I have found is that often times my boundaries with my clients (not talking on the phone between sessions, not texting/emailing after a certain time of night, not following them back on social media, not engaging in romantic relationships with them, not inviting them to my home or giving them my home address, etc.) have felt like I am abandoning them. Leaving them to fend for themselves in a world where so many others have already left them alone.

This is not uncommon for individuals with unresolved trauma.

Abandonment is a fear for many and with a sensitive nervous system, any action (even healthy action) that mimics anything even remotely familiar to the traumatized nervous system, will feel like the traumatized individual is all alone, unsupported once again.

04/07/2026

What else am I missing? Drop it in the comments!

04/06/2026

If you find yourself resonating with with what I’m talking about, you’re not alone and you don’t have to navigate this alone. Schedule your free inquiry call today and begin working with a religious trauma trained coach!

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Nashville, TN
37212

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