Talk Sex Now!

06/12/2016

Regarding messages you may send, please ask a question related to an issue you wish to resolve; excluding messages about inquiring s*xual play (not offered here and will be ignored).

Thanks! ☺️

04/20/2016

Today's Most Common Communication Style!

12. Never ending anxiety

02/16/2016

Take some time to cuddle your lover && bask in happiness 💞 We all need love!!

12/21/2015

Life is about pleasure. We are human beings & crave s*xual satisfaction. What do you think is stopping you from getting that satisfaction?

12/19/2015

Hello, Mind Readers!

Hey there! Guess what? There aren't any of you! And if there are, there aren't enough of you for everyone else to date...

I bring this up because many of us, when caught up in love/lust/interest in another person, we somehow forget to remember that they can't read our minds (from new relationships to long-term relationships). Oh, or what we meant by the tone of our voice or how we spoke period...or didn't speak on purpose. Then sometimes we get hurt or confused over what's going on. Well, you're in luck, I've found the solution!!

COMMUNICATION!!!

Let's say you're in a fight with the person you're seeing. You may be mad, sad, done with him/her, sorry, or indifferent. But if you don't state what you're feeling then s/he will never know. Your partner most likely doesn't know how to gauge what to do with what's not said, especially if you want a specific outcome.

Say you want something in particular: birthday present, groceries, the laundry done, the child bathed, a meal cooked, etc. it's really not that difficult to say, "Honey, could you please...." Brain waves and internal thoughts can't travel person to person. However, this tactic of communicating doesn't guarantee your partner's answer to be "yes" all the time. Nor does it mean that s/he will forgive you, or also be angry, sad, upset, done or indifferent. Perhaps they're not an effective communicator.

It does guarantee, though, that your skills as a communicator will be empowered and more effective each time you use them. It would be great if your partner learned the skills also. Do by being as clear as you can be with your partner, you can resolve issues much faster and with greater ease. They will also learn your communication style so, and you their's, which gives the relationship a higher potential for success. It isn't fair to expect them to be able to read your mind. Can you read theirs?

Additionally, you're doing yourself an injustice. Why would you want to stay in a state of unhappiness? The beginning steps to working through things/working toward happiness, is by talking about issues, concerns, wants, desires, outlooks and so forth. Dont' be afraid to speak! Certainly shouting/yelling/raised voices nor reluctantly agreeing to everything is not the communication I speak of, but rather open, honest (equal share of talking and listening) and truthful communication is what you're aiming for.

If your partner pushes you to talk, when you need more time before you're ready, it's definitely okay to say: "I know you're ready to talk now but I need a little more time. Can we try later (or whenever the earliest time you can is)?" It is important, though, to give a rough estimate of when you can talk or share what a sign would be to indicate you are ready to talk. That way you're not brushing your partner off, you're letting them know you care but need a little longer before you are able to talk. If you're ready before your partner and they seem unable to open up, ask if they need time. Once you know how to be an effective communicator, remember that your partner may not be as effective and you should consider that when choosing what to say/how to react. Patience is a virtue, my friends, and super essential for relationships to succeed.

COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE, COMMUNICATE!!!

Take your time, don't speak when upset, but don't be afraid to speak about how you feel when you are in a calm state to share. Most people who want a relationship to succeed are open to discussing issues so they can work toward a happy future. There aren't enough mind reader's for everyone, so here's another way to still be content :)

Happy Loving! 💞

12/13/2015

The Big "O"

Or***ms. Everyone wants one, but not everyone gets one. Why is it that not everyone feels they can get off? Unfortunately there is more than one answer to this, but fortunately there are solutions!

Sometimes there is an intense pressure to cum. For example, if you are having s*x with a person for the first time and want to keep their attention having an or**sm seems to be a wonderful outcome. It makes you feel great and your partner feel great. If you don't or**sm, perhaps you're afraid that you won't keep them, that you'll disappoint them, that they'll want to have less s*x with you. WRONG! It is OKAY not to cum! S*x is more than just an or**sm, it is about the intimacy between the two people that are sharing it. Obviously with a one night stand it'll be disappointing - but you'd be faking it for it to be over with (seeing how it wasn't that good, haha). So my advice is to just relax and let things happen. It make take more than 20 minutes to achieve climax, and that is fine. The more you talk to your partner about how you like to be touched the easier cu***ng may be as well. Or if you feel your partner is pressuring you to cm too fast (and you lose concentration, etc.) then explain that to them. The majority of those involved in relationships want a two way street: to please and to be pleased. Don't get caught up in the moment of pressure, breathe and take a minute.

For others there may be psychological inhibitors that don't allow a person to concentrate or let go enough. Do you have a history of s*xual abuse? Do you feel shy or intimidated? Were there any past relationships that influence your s*x drive/s*xual actions? Psychological issues can be addressed by oneself without a therapist if one is willing to do some hardcore self a**lysis. Write down different s*xual encounters you've had and what within those encounters you felt comfortable with or don't feel comfortable with. Once you're ready to address your partner with what you feel the issue may be - you'll feel relieved, revived, and ready to enjoy s*x again.

Another factor could be personal insecurities. Do you ma******te? Do you know what an or**sm feels like? Believe it or not, knowing what it feels like will allow you to mentally go there when AND share with your partner what spots you know turn you on & feel good. Using a toy to get off is nothing to be ashamed of. If you're feeling insecure because you're pregnant, express that to your partner especially for reassurance purposes!! Insecurities can develop for many different reasons. Explore those feelings; you're worth it!!

**The true key to an or**sm is patience**

For those who feel they can't provide adequate service: You can't touch a va**na or a p***s and think things will just happen by themselves. You need to read the person's body, ask what they like and don't like, and really listen when they moan or shift their position. Every body is different; everyone has different erogenous zones. Be sure to explore everything before giving up; including communicating what you are physically experience during s*x. Perhaps you're not good at something the other person wants, doesn't mean you can't learn.

For those who feel they need to fake it: Tell your partner what you want! Maybe you're so silent and stiff that reading any energy from you becomes impossible. You cannot expect your partner to be a mind reader! No matter how 'seasoned' they are, they don't have a magic wand with the ability to read what you're thinking. Don't be afraid to say something. Your biggest mistake will be faking it every time, because then your partner will think you like things you really don't and you'll never be satisfied.

YOU CAN GET OFF! Embrace what is necessary to achieve that or**sm. Work at believing in yourself! Achieve Climax!

12/08/2015

Who Doesn't Need Toys?

Toys can vary in sizes, uses, and preferences. But don't discriminate! They may not be for everyone but they can be useful. The qualm most people have with them comes from never having used them, never having seen them used, or plain lack of information. Tools/toys can actually enhance a s*xual experience if used properly. DON'T KNOCK IT TILL YOU TRY IT!

Dildo's are one of many toys that get overlooked and are deemed only for le***an d***s. WRONG! A lot of women actually enjoy multiple stimulus so while their male or female partner is using that on them internally what's wrong with a little oral attached? They also make a great foreplay. For straight men - they don't always last as long as their female partner needs them to in order for the female to or**sm also. If they were to start with a d***o, or other internal device that can provide a similar feeling, and then finish with their own equipment there could be better pleasure for the both of them. A misconception about le***ans is why would they use d***os (or p***s-looking tools/toys) when they're supposed to only like girls?The toy is NOT a p***s, it's a toy; and stimulation is stimulation. Therefore, if a le***an is to use a tool it does not mean they are bis*xual or like men - it simply means they enjoy pleasure in that way. Gay men also, just because they have a p***s doesn't mean they don't like toys. Giving a blow job and a**l insertion may be just what your partner is looking for! There are multiple ways of cu***ng, just like there are multiple way to please. OH! Double-sided d***o's are also a beneficial toy. Double the pleasure, half the work!

Vibration, vibration! Whether it's a traditional vi****or, a rabbit, a cl****al stimulator, finger vibes or a c**k ring - it all feels great! If you are one of the unfortunate people to have never touched one or owned one, I highly advise it. It is a wonderful addition to self pleasure as well as joint pleasure. Many people, specifically women, don't know how to make themselves cum. If you don't know, ladies, no one else will. You could encounter one of the most well-informed people ever, but it doesn't mean he or she can read minds. Learning what it feels like to cm the way you'd like to cm will ultimately lead to a better s*x life. And who doesn't want that? Men should also invest, and not just in c**k rings. Using a vi****or as a secondary stimulus to a regular hand job spices up the self pleasure, and also becomes something your partner can play with too! Don't overlook this toy!

A**l beads? Most people when I bring up this topic look at me with their eyes crossed. "It is an exit only region." Maybe I'm not talking to gay men enough!! Did you know that a**l organs can be a way to or**sm too, especially if trying to obtain multiple pleasure? For those who can't take a d***o, a p***s, or anything of that size and width I would suggest fingers or a**l beads. Fingers are a great way to start off, especially if you're concerned with pain or anything, but a**l beads provide a pleasure that is increasing versus steady. The balls increase in size though it is NOT necessary to take the whole strand. They are not for everyone, sure, but they should at least be contemplated.

There are also more toys than just those that can be inserted. A blindfold is a great way to build anticipation. It can be used before or during and serves as one of the best toys around. There are all different types of blind folds too, addressing fetishes of all sorts. Perhaps you have an outfit you want to keep secret from you partner because you know it will rub him or her the right way - use a blind fold! Once it's taken off the anticipation will be at such great height it will be almost impossible to lose their attention. Handcuffs are also a great s*x toy. They are available with different types of fabrics, furs, and colors! There are many ways and many places one could handcuff their partner and switch up the role of control. How about rope?! Don't be silly, this isn't typical rope. This has to be rope that is purchased in a s*x shop/s*x store because the material it is made with prevents rope burn. However, those who are masochists could use whatever they like - but for the rest of us I would suggest the specialized rope. Rope is also great for suspension. There are many wonderful books that teach the proper way to tie knots that allow for suspension, but one should invest in the proper things you'd need in order to suspend someone safely.

The key with all toys is safety. Make sure they're washed, sanitized, and used properly. Exploration is fantastic, but some things can cause damage...especially tying up, inserting, or binding any area that may be vital to that person's s*x life (i.e. p***s, balls, breasts, ass). DO YOUR RESEARCH! Although toys are not always needed to have an or**sm, they certainly help. They are not only a physical stimulator but they are also a mental stimulator. Explore your fantasies!! But most importantly do your research, do your research, do your research (did I mention research?) before you make any kind of purchase. Most toys are not returnable. If still packaged they may do an exchange for store credit, but avoiding that would be best.

Who doesn't want an or**sm? No one. Unless you're A-S*xual of course...but then this blog wouldn't be for you ;c)

12/06/2015

"Friendship by day, S*x partner by night!" - Chrys

Friends with benefits. Yes, they do exist! And yes, they can be healthy if approached right.

As humans we all feed off of human touch, contact and conversation. Therefore it is natural to have friends with whom we can engage in amazing conversation with but also have that s*xual release with (without strings, jealousy or extra complications). This release doesn't always have to be s*x, but it can be flirtation, physical touching/caressing, a cuddle buddy, etc. Benefits has a lot of meanings, so be sure to discuss with your partner what it is you want out of that relationship. Not everyone has a friend with whom they can have benefits with, for it is not necessary; but it is normal for the general population.

Approaching this type of situation with caution would be my advice to anyone and everyone who potentially wants to get involved in a relationship of this nature. For just as we all have needs for conversation and s*xual pleasure, we do have emotions too. Emotions can get tied into it if one party gets attached. This doesn't happen all the time, but if it does a friendship will typically be ruined and a heart may be broken. They seem much simpler than they actually are.

When getting into these situations one should:
- discuss fully with the other person their intent before initiating anything!!!
- discuss boundaries, limits and restrictions
- keep each other well informed of where their emotions are (for although one may think they can keep their emotions under control they may be thinking that they are getting passed signals by their "friends with benefits partner" that mean more than what they actually do)

If you follow the guidelines above I feel you'll have a better turn out if you choose to engage in such activity. KEEP YOUR EMOTIONS IN CHECK!

A check list for if you may be feeling anything too emotional:
- jealousy
- anger
- resentment
- too high of expectations/unrealistic expectations (e.g. all of their time & attention)
- confusion about the future (for there shouldn't be any future but the present as each present day happens [until it doesn't anymore])

A friendship by day and s*x partner by night could be one of the greatest experiences of your life. You don't have anyone that you're committed to, no one to answer to, you can live your own life but have that release when necessary, it's at your own convenience (and theirs), ability to have more than one friend with benefits, etc. If done properly it could reduce a lot of stress in your life (if of course this is something you want at the time).

Always heed with caution: emotions are tricky suckers... but if you keep communication OPEN and FLOWING you shouldn't run into many problems

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If you are planning on ending a friends with benefits situation you DO need to take emotions into consideration. Although both of you should have kept your emotions in check it isn't about whether someone has fallen for you or not, but about who they are individually. You need, need, NEED to give thought to your friends' feelings for you don't want them to think that you're ending it based on dissatisfaction with who they are as a person...especially if you want to continue a friendship with them.

Let them know where you're coming from, why it is you don't want to be involved in that way anymore, as well as all of the positive qualities you found in them and why you wish to keep them as your friend. Saying things in a positive way can be extremely beneficial for all relationships (friendships, friends with benefits, boyfriends/girlfriends) so it should ensure your ability to maintain that friendship after the extra benefits are taken away.

If you wish not to be their friend and to lose all contact you DO NOT have to be mean about it. They are still people; still humans with real emotions and feelings. You should be kind and compassionate and let them know exactly why you cannot remain friends. Positivity begets positivity; you don't want bad karma in your life. Treat others as you wish to be treated, please and thank you.

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Enjoy every aspect of each other, with caution, kindness and humanity. Watch out for your emotions. And RESPECT each other.

12/04/2015

"S*x is the ultimate beauty enhancer. No product or procedure can beat getting down and dirty in making you even more gorgeous"
Check out YouBeauty!

We spend countless hours and dollars to doll ourselves up, but Mother Nature has given us women an au natural way to turn heads: S-E-X. Sure, there’s a time and a place for perfectly applied eyeliner and not-a-strand-out-of-place hair. But really, what’s hotter than devil-may-care, mussed up bed…

11/15/2015

Know your body - ma******te and enjoy ;)

11/11/2015

Have you had an or**sm lately? It is healthy to have one, hop on that 😉

10/13/2015

The most important relationship you'll ever have is with yourself! Check out my article in Maniac Magazine!
www.maniacmagazine.com