Tonya Lester

Tonya Lester is a psychotherapist and coach in Brooklyn, New York.

12/05/2025

❤️ Love is active. Love is actionable.

It’s easy to get caught up in words—“I love you,” “I care,” “I’ll change”—but love isn’t defined by what someone says.

It’s defined by what they do every single day. If someone consistently acts in a cruel, dismissive, or demeaning way, their love isn’t real, no matter how many times they say it.

✨ Take a moment today to reflect: Are your relationships showing love through actions, or just words?

💬 Comment below or DM me: What’s one action that makes you feel truly loved?

12/02/2025

It’s okay to need a little extra help. 🌿

Wanting to start therapy doesn’t mean you weren’t “strong enough.” It means you’re seeking tools and advice to transform your life in positive ways.

💬 You don’t have to figure it out alone. Reach out and get the support you deserve with my Individual Therapy.

Book now - link in the bio.

11/25/2025

We live in a world that tells us to “just stay positive,” but ignoring anger, jealousy, or guilt comes at a cost.

Each feeling carries vital information about your needs, your values, and your relationships.

So, embrace your feelings and start creating a life that respects YOU! 🫵

11/23/2025

Are you constantly smoothing over conflicts or taking on more responsibility than your fair share?

You might be acting as the “shock absorber” in your relationships — protecting others at the cost of your own needs, happiness, and growth.

The truth is, relationships only thrive when honesty and courageous communication are present.

✨ Read more and start reclaiming your voice today!

https://www.tonyalester.com/blog/5-signs-of-giving-up-too-much-to-keep-everyone-happy

11/21/2025

Many women downplay their frustration to avoid conflict, but that only prolongs problems.

So today, take five minutes to write about a moment that frustrated you and how it made you feel. Understanding your anger gives you power to act.

Read the article and try this exercise today!

https://allisondaminger.substack.com/p/he-needs-to-be-rattled-by-her-clarity

11/20/2025

A question I hear often in my therapy practice is, “Should I stay or can they change?” 🤔

The answer depends on whether you and your partner are collaborators or resisters.

✨ Collaborators will try to do the hard work of listening, taking responsibility, and making visible change.

✨ While resisters will dismiss efforts, avoid communication, and leave you feeling drained.

Lasting growth in a relationship only happens when both partners are willing to change it. Check out my blog post on Psychology Today now - links in the bio 🌿

11/18/2025

Anger has been mislabeled — called ugly, dramatic, unproductive.

But what if it’s actually the start of your healing? 🤔

That fire inside you isn’t something to suppress; it’s your power reminding you you’re still alive.

Read Push Back for more tools to transform your anger into clarity.

11/14/2025

Personal isn’t about rewriting the past but reclaiming your present. 🌿

Each moment you choose to show up differently, with courage, compassion, or honesty - you’re actively reshaping what comes next.

Let this be your gentle reminder that your story isn’t finished yet. 💛

11/06/2025

Reading your messages, reviews, and seeing your photos with “Push Back” has been beyond rewarding. ❤️

Every note from a reader who finally set a boundary, had a hard conversation, or felt seen for the first time makes this work worth every moment.

Keep sharing your stories and tagging me - you never know who you’ll inspire to find their voice. 🌿

Join the community of readers by grabbing your own copy today - links in the bio.

11/04/2025

Women are socialized to smooth over tension, to compromise endlessly, and to maintain peace at their own expense.

But shrinking yourself doesn’t preserve the relationship—it erases your needs.

So this is your reminder that it’s okay to speak up and it’s okay to say no!

Double-tap if you’re ready to stop shrinking and share this with someone who needs the reminder today. ♥️

11/03/2025

There’s a good kind of difficult - the kind that comes from self-awareness and integrity. 🌿

In my chat on The Meaningful Life Podcast, I talked about what that really looks like: taking full responsibility for who you are, communicating clearly, and staying grounded in empathy.

You can create a space where both you and your partner feel safe to have honest conversations.

✨ Tune in to the full episode now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohVEmXMPnP0

10/31/2025

I’m thankful for my readers and the amazing “Push Back” community. 💬

To everyone who has felt like they needed to apologize to stay likable or were taught that staying silent was safer than being seen - this book is for you.

Let this book reignite that spark inside that says, “You can do anything.” ✨

Order your copy of “Push Back” now.

Address

26 Court St
New York, NY
11242

Telephone

(212) 242-3149

Website

http://www.tonyalester.com/

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