This page serves as a social media account for Tina Ebsen MA LMFT ATR, Licensed Marriage & Family Th
Operating as usual
12/04/2022
Have you seen Stutz? His conceptualizations of these important topics were pretty great—clearly made meaningful for Jonah Hill.
Want to Change Your Life? Start with Stutz’ Tools from Jonah Hill’s Therapist “Anyone can take an unpleasant experience and turn it into an opportunity.”
Do these messages about changing children’s behavior sound familiar to you?
07/20/2022
Drop a 💛 in the comments below if you needed this reminder today
“You deserve to be loved without having to hide parts of yourself that you think are unlovable.” ~Unknown. Quote seen on Tiny Buddha]’s page 💕
Thank you Quotes by Christie] Tiny Buddha]
Art created by 🎨🖌 Quotes by Christie]
07/16/2022
Launching today, you can now call 988 if you’re contemplating su***de or struggling with your mental health. Learn more at https://988lifeline.org.
02/20/2021
These can be magic words to improve any relationship.
The Best Way to Show Someone That You Care Saying "I understand," and meaning it.
02/03/2021
This episode got personal fast.
Steve and I have been together for 30 years and 2020 was probably the most difficult season of our marriage. The stress of trying to keep our kids safe while attending to their need for connection, worrying about our parents' wellbeing, trying to make work work — it was completely overwhelming.
Drs. John and Julie Gottman have dedicated their careers to helping people love and take care of each other. Their work is research-based and life-changing.
After decades of study, the Gottmans and their colleagues at The Gottman Institute can predict with 90% accuracy whether a couple will stay together after observing the first 3 minutes of an argument. That's unheard of in the social sciences.
The conversation is a game-changer.
http://bit.ly/3cyTZax
12/28/2020
Some new ways to make meaning of 2020 as we enter into the new year.
Why New Year’s Resolutions Matter More in a Pandemic Ask yourself these five questions when setting 2021 goals.
12/18/2020
The first Christmas without a loved one | AK Lander Missing a loved one at Christmas? This article shares advice and experiences about coping with the first Christmas after the loss of a loved one.
12/02/2020
Starbucks is giving free coffee to health care workers this month Until the end of December, a customer "who identifies as a front-line responder to the COVID-19 outbreak" can walk into any Starbucks in the US and receive a free tall brewed coffee, hot or iced, the company said.
11/17/2020
Throughout this pandemic I have been halfway joking about “prescription Animal Crossing.” In my practice, it has shown much benefit to those coping with anxiety, isolation, and loss of leisure activity.
Games Like Animal Crossing Are Good For Your Mental Health, Claims Oxford University Study "This lets us explain and understand games as a leisure activity"
11/12/2020
Word of the day (or year?): allostatic load.
You aren’t alone. Allostatic load was first introduced and defined by McEwen and Stellar (McEwen 2001) and is the chronic, cumulative effect of high-stress situations in daily life that are experienced as taxing or exceeding our coping skills. Further, stress responses that are too frequent, too quick (daily challenges and transitions), too intense, and too long (more than 10-20 min) can all contribute to allostatic overload. (Can we say hello, 2020?) So if your own anxiety is feeling more chaotic and dialed up than you would like, and you’re having a hard time regulating it, then try walking in nature (No earbuds! Just listen to the world and get a break from stimulation!). Remember to exercise, try mindfulness meditations (or apps like Headspace and Calm), breathe deeply, and/or seek out support. We all need someone who shows up for us. And, if needed, seek out a mental health professional who can help you with your own emotional waves. Take care during this challenging time. Together, we can move through it.
Still hanging in there?
Although it may be uncomfortable, we cannot ignore another upcoming pour to our emotional cup. November 7th, we are reminded of the anniversary of Borderline and the Wolsey/Hill Fire following.
Plan to allow for your feelings of grief, prioritize your self-care, and take ease with your favorite comforts.
It often helps to do an act of remembrance and share memories with others. The Healing Garden and Borderline Memorial are places to visit if you so choose.
Don’t suffer alone. If you experience significant distress please reach out for support.
Take care everyone ❤️
You already know, today is Election Day.
A significant number of people are experiencing high levels of stress from the election (and amidst the backdrop of the pandemic). Some have thrown around the term “Election Stress Disorder” to talk about this experience.
Take good care of your mental health in these next few days of uncertainty. 1.) Take breaks from news feeds and media, 2.) do something you enjoy, 3.) get some fresh air and exercise, 4.) get cozy, and 5.) if you need support, please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional.
Be Well!
10/21/2020
09/17/2020
Calm app too expensive? Good news for Kaiser members: a year subscription is now available for you!
Mindfulness apps – No Cost for Members | Kaiser Permanente Use the myStrength and Calm self-care apps at no cost. Learn how to build resilience, set goals, improve sleep, manage depression, reduce stress, and more.
09/16/2020
How do you feel learning about Pepsi’s new product?
PepsiCo to launch drink to aid sleep as consumers struggle with stress PepsiCo is launching a new enhanced water drink called Driftwell.
09/15/2020
Old feeling, new name. Do you related to experiences of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria?
What Is Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria? Now gaining more attention, RSD can pack an emotional wallop.
08/01/2020
What forgiveness is not, and steps to take towards your healing and freedom [supplemental linked worksheet in comments].
Why Forgiving Someone Else Is Really About You : Life Kit Deciding to forgive is a big step. After all, you're the one who's been harmed! But it turns out that forgiving someone actually has benefits for your mental health. The practice of radical forgiveness can help you process hurt and anger — and ultimately find peace.
07/31/2020
A gentle reminder...
07/30/2020
Depression can have you feeling like you have no gas in the tank to do anything—like exercise; but light exercise can work to fill up your tank so you have more energy in your day.
Bonus: if you can get some fresh air, sunlight, and greenery.
8 Workouts For Depression You Can Do At Home If you have depression, one of the most irritating things someone can say is "you'll feel better if you just work out." But it does help.
07/29/2020
Read this post by the Gottman Institute if it’s hard for you to talk to your partner because you’re worried they’ll be defensive.
07/23/2020
07/17/2020
Putting it off until tomorrow...again? Your chronic procrastination is telling your something.
Tired of procrastinating? To overcome it, take the time to understand it Procrastination isn’t shameful or a character flaw. Instead it’s rooted in a very human need: the need to feel competent and worthy, says educator Nic Voge.
07/13/2020
Tune in: Three Guided Meditations to Conquer Anxiety and Build Resilience - Mindful Explore these practices hand-picked by the Mindful Editors to help you cultivate inner strength.
07/11/2020
How about a brief moment for mindful reflection—can you identify one thing for each of these questions today?
07/10/2020
07/08/2020
Will you be watching? ‘Love on the Spectrum‘ series centering around this important topic.
Love on the Spectrum | Netflix Official Site Finding love can be hard for anyone. For young adults on the autism spectrum, exploring the unpredictable world of dating is even more complicated.
07/03/2020
Not sure what to say to someone who is hurting? Got a strong urge to fix it or make the person feel better? Watch this...
How do you help a grieving friend? (sharing this video? using it in a training! Great! Tag or email us and let us know, and be sure to give proper attribution.) It's so hard to know what to do...
07/01/2020
Free to attend for anyone interested in mental health (your own or others’). Take a peek at the sessions...
NAMI’s 2020 National Convention is virtual and free! Join us on July 13 and 14 for the latest in mental health research, early intervention, youth-focused programming and more. Register at nami.org/convention
06/05/2020
And another:
How can parents of Black children continue to instill confidence and pride in young kids while also explaining the racial injustices that continue today? How can parents of non-Black children help young kids understand their role in anti-Black racism? Join fellow parents, educators and child development and trauma experts for an important conversation about how you can talk with young children about racial injustice and violence against Black people. https://to.pbs.org/2Y2L88d
06/04/2020
Parents take note:
Sesame Street is joining CNN this Saturday for a Town Hall to help kids and families discuss racism and the protests taking place nationwide, build empathy, and embrace diversity. Watch the hour-long special this Saturday June 6 at 10 am ET.
06/04/2020
For COVID (or any other) overwhelming anxiety, sometimes it can help to focus on what agency you do have. [Full article from the creator of this image in the comments.]
06/04/2020
Wanting to start with some guided meditations to ease your anxiety? Here’s the link for free subscription offers from Headspace.
We’re here for you - Headspace There are a lot of unknowns in the world right now. But one thing is certain — Headspace is here for you. To help you, we’re offering some meditations you can listen to anytime.
06/01/2020
Many times we jump to fix or make it about us. We need more listening and holding space for others. Now is a good time to practice.
Instead of trying to change or fix the feelings of the person you love, focus on connecting with them.
To empathize with your partner when their hurt feelings are a result of something you said or did without defending yourself requires skill and practice. Discover the four skills to improve your ability and willingness to empathize.
Read more on the Gottman Relationship Blog: https://bit.ly/2MaHdQU
05/31/2020
05/29/2020
Come Join! I will be presenting June 3rd for the Tarjan Center at UCLA on supporting the mental health of college students with disabilities in response to COVID-19.
The Tarjan Center at UCLA will be presenting a series of two webinars to provide: Guidance and Strategies for Supporting the Mental Health of Students with Autism Spectrum Disorder and Students with an Intellectual Disability
Presented by: UCLA Tarjan Center
Moderated by: Wilbert Francis, MBA
Part 1 - The first webinar will be held on June 1st from 1:00 P.M. to 2:45 P.M. (PST). This webinar will focus on common problems that can co-occur with autism spectrum disorder (ASD), connecting students with campus and community resource, and strategies to help students with disabilities thrive in the era of COVID-19.
A description of the first webinar and access to register can be found here:
https://uclahs.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_0vJDPUHFQymhz3qRbmhcaA
Part 2 - The second webinar will be held on June 3rd from 9:00 A.M. to 10:45 A.M. (PST). This webinar will focus on practical tools to check in with students on their well-being, COVID-19’s impact on mental health, and strategies and tools for supporting adult students with Intellectual and Developmental Disabilities in online learning environments.
A description of the second webinar and access to register can be found here:
https://uclahs.zoom.us/webinar/register/WN_HAP2TBkRQR24AHmqJelQlw
05/29/2020
I am grateful for Esther Perel's 4-part series on Love, Loss, Loneliness and a Pinch of Humor in response to the COVID-19 lockdown. Link to the first episode here and more in the comments.
How to adjust to your entire relational world being confined to one place. Part 1 The first of four live workshops from Esther covering how we engage with the new normal from a relational perspective.
05/28/2020
Self-Compassion—It’s a life changer. Some good strategies to start being kinder to yourself (or share with someone you know can use more of it).
How to be kinder to yourself People who have greater levels of self-compassion tend to be more motivated, less lazy, and more successful over time. But just as important, they like themselves, even when they fall short. Psycho…
05/26/2020
Save this image for the next time you have a strong emotional response. Did you actually feel trapped, scolded, judged, or powerless in that situation?
The key to processing an argument is to first talk about what happened to understand what went wrong, how you each were feeling, and what could have prevented the discussion from ending in such a negative way.
Try to understand your partner’s reality and not to argue for your own perspective. Take turns sharing what each other was feeling and what may have triggered those feelings by using the "What Triggered Me?" chart.
Learn more about managing conflict and the Aftermath of a Fight exercise: https://bit.ly/3bsRy5c
05/24/2020
So tell me how you really feel...This tool by Gloria Willcox can be helpful to find the words that describe our nuanced emotional experiences.
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