01/08/2023
Our primary love language is different from the language we speak in many ways. The language we use to communicate is established in our early development, and typically remain the same throughout our lifespan. This is not true for our primary love language. There are many things and experiences that have the potential to change the way we communicate and receive love. One example is, the area of greatest deficit in our last relationship, becomes the area of focus (or primary love language) in our next relationship. If in your last relationship there was very little physical affection, or touch was used as a weapon, this dynamic creates a hunger in you for affection and touch. In your next relationship, physical touch will supersede all the other love languages, and become your primary. For this reason, it is not only important for your partner to remain a curious learner of who you are, it is more important that self discovery and self awareness becomes a natural state of being for you. Imagine being in a situation where you are trying to communicate with someone, trying many different languages, yet failing because the person to whom you are communicating doesn’t even know what language they speak!!! This barrier to communication is at the root of many failed relationships. Spend time with yourself to get to truly know who you are. You cannot truly love what you do not truly know!!
