04/22/2026
You don’t have bad luck in relationships… you have a pattern.
Different person, same outcome.
You go in thinking this one will be different, and then at some point it starts to feel familiar again. The overthinking, the uncertainty, the feeling of not being fully secure… or realizing you’re ignoring things you probably shouldn’t.
And then it turns into, “why does this keep happening?” or even “is it me?”
What I’ve found, both personally and in working with clients, is that this usually isn’t random at all.
It’s a pattern that’s being driven at a subconscious level. A lot of it comes from early experiences, attachment stuff, and what your nervous system has learned to see as familiar… even if it doesn’t actually feel good.
That’s why you can be aware, you can “know better,” and still end up in the same kind of situation.
Because it’s not happening at the conscious level.
And that’s also why just trying to think differently or set better boundaries doesn’t always fully change it.
The real shift happens when you understand the pattern and change it at the root. That’s the work I do with my clients.
If this is something you’ve been noticing in your own life, feel free to reach out. I’m always happy to talk!
