05/20/2025
You probably don’t want to hear this…but just analyzing your emotions won’t make them go away.
You have to actually feel them.
Knowledge is important, yes. It’s helpful to understand why we feel the way we do about certain things, why we react and respond in the ways that we do. But we can get so caught up in the intellectualization of our feelings, that we avoid actually feeling them… a necessary component to processing and working through. And what we resist, persists.
Knowing isn’t enough….you have to have experience too. It’s like reading a manual on how to ride a bike, but never actually getting on a bike and riding.
The next time you find yourself stuck in your head about your feelings, try this reframe: not what does this feelings say, but how does this feeling feel? Shift from the language of your mind (thought) to the language of your body (sensation).
Notice the sensations and location in your body…
Where is the feeling? In your stomach, chest, head, hands?
How does the feeling feel? Does it feel sharp, fluttery, tingly, knotted, tight?
Is it big or small?
Does it feel hot, cold, frozen?
Does it have a color?
See if you can stay connected to the actual feeling in your body instead of what your brain is saying about it… even if for just a few minutes. It might be a little uncomfortable, we know. Just breathe through and into it. Ride the wave of it.
You may be surprised by how much quicker and easier your feelings move through when they have your attention, rather than being explained away.
Go slow, be gentle with yourself. It may be a new way of experiencing your world…but it may also just be exactly what you’ve needed.