10/22/2025
The quote is from an excerpt of Mel Robbins’ book The Let Them Theory.
It’s a powerful reminder to let people show up exactly as they are—without trying to change them—knowing that the only thing we can truly control is our reaction.
When we learn to let others be who they are, we free ourselves. Their actions show us how they feel about us, and from that awareness, we can choose. They’re either meeting our needs or leaving us with longing and discontent—and both reveal valuable information.
If they call, great. If they don’t—let them not.
If they show affection, wonderful. If they don’t—let them not.
We always have a choice: to accept the behavior or to choose ourselves—our needs, our desires, our worth. Not everyone will align with what we hope for, and that’s okay.
We don’t need to insert ourselves, prove ourselves, or beg for belonging. If we find ourselves spending too much energy doing so, it’s a sign to shift our focus—to value and choose ourselves instead. Letting others be who they are does not define our worth.
With love and courage,
Sara
Unearthed Counseling and Wellness, LLC.
Unearthedcounselingandwellness.com