All Too Well Therapy

05/01/2026

Farewell April! 🌼🌸🌷🌼🌸🌷

05/01/2026

04/29/2026

I’m actually a big fan of women revealing why they broke up with a man. There’s no need to maintain their image. There’s no need to protect the reputation of someone who didn’t protect your peace. There’s no need to be the bigger person for a man who was the smallest version of himself behind closed doors. Let it be known. Let the story be told. Let the next woman have a map of the minefield you walked through barefoot.

Silence is how bad men stay dating: We’ve been trained to break up quietly. To take the high road. To post the we grew apart caption while he’s out here lying, cheating, raging, or weaponizing incompetence. We swallow the truth so he can keep his dating pool full. So he can rebrand by Valentine’s Day as a good guy who got done dirty.” So the next woman thinks she’s crazy when he does the same s**t to her. No. If he was dangerous, say it. If he was cruel, say it. If he cheated, say it. If he love-bombed you then ghosted you, say it. His image is not your responsibility. Her safety is. Your healing is. The truth is.
No need to maintain their image means stop co-signing your own disrespect: Every time we break up and say he’s a great guy, just wasn’t for me, we lie. And we lie for him. We lie so his mom still likes us. We lie so his boys don’t call us bitter. We lie so we don’t look crazy. But what’s actually crazy is letting a man destroy you in private and then protecting him in public. What’s crazy is bleeding out quietly so he can walk around clean. You don’t owe him a PR team. You owe yourself the full story. You owe other women the data. You owe the version of you that cried on the bathroom floor the dignity of the truth.
Men get to be anonymous. Women get to be anecdotes: He gets to be my ex. She gets to be “the crazy one. He gets a fresh start. She gets a reputation. He gets to tell his friends she was just insecure. She gets to rebuild her whole nervous system. So yeah, say why you left. Say he screamed at you. Say he hid his phone. Say he didn’t have a job for 3 years. Say he made you feel small. Say he only liked you when you were miserable. Because his next girl deserves to Google him and find more than gym selfies. She deserves to find you. With your words. With your warning. With your freedom.
Maintaining his image is misogyny’s favorite contract: We sign it without reading it. “Don’t air dirty laundry. Don’t speak ill of the dead relationship. Be classy. Translation: be quiet so he can do it again. Translation: care more about his future prospects than your past pain. Translation: let him be the victim of the breakup he caused. I’m done. Be messy. Be honest. Be loud. If he wanted a good story told about him, he should’ve been a good man to you. If he wanted privacy, he should’ve acted right in private. You don’t get to break a woman and then ask her to be your character witness.

I’m actually a big fan of women revealing why they broke up with a man. There’s no need to maintain their image.

Let him explain his own behavior to the next one.

Let him tell her why his ex has a podcast episode about him.

Let him sit in the reputation he earned.

You

Tell the truth.

Name the pattern.

Burn the PR script.

His image is not your job.

Your peace is.

And the next woman?

She’ll thank you for not taking it to the grave

04/29/2026

When I think about the weekends that I used to spend at the office or staring at my computer catching up, it makes me cringe. I did it to make the week ahead easier. I did it to make more money. I did it so I could take a vacation (even though I worked on vacation too). I did it to prove what a hard worker I was. I did it because I felt guilty for falling behind and I did it because I had way too much to do. All legitimate reasons, but none of my catching up ever got me caught up.
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There was always more.
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The illusion of catching up goes something like this: If we take a full day/weekend/week and abandon all the things we enjoy doing, we can get everything done that we feel guilty about not doing before. Then we will feel better, everyone will love us and all will be well in the world.
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Remember the glass and plastic ball analogy? Think about all of the balls you have up in the air like ... taking care of yourself, feeding your kids, a project deadline, mental health, physical health, having fun, cleaning house, asking for a raise, emptying your inbox, responding to a text message, laundry, watching a movie (and on and on and on). Some of those items are made of glass so if they drop, they will break or be damaged. Others are made of plastic and they bounce. You can pick them up again later (or not). This is not about balance, this is about priority.
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Hold on to what matters, let go of the rest. If catching up worked, we’d be caught up by now.

04/29/2026

It’s giving looney tunes🤯
Protect your peace.

04/28/2026

If you feel the need to have a “last night of freedom” before your wedding, then it’s worth seriously questioning the decision to get married in the first place—because marriage isn’t supposed to feel like a loss of freedom, but rather a meaningful commitment you enter willingly and wholeheartedly.

If part of you sees it as something you need to escape from, even briefly, that could point to doubts, unresolved fears, or a lack of readiness that shouldn’t be ignored.

A strong, healthy marriage is built on mutual trust, respect, and a genuine desire to be with one another—not on the idea that one chapter of life is ending like a restriction.

So if that mindset is there, it might be better to pause, reflect honestly, and address those feelings before taking such a major step.