05/06/2026
Worrying is our mind's way of working through problems.
But all too often, we worry about things we can’t do anything about, trapping us in an endless loop. When that happens, it can be powerful to distinguish between what we ‘can’ and ‘cannot’ control. This gives us permission to release what lies beyond our grasp and focus our energy where it’ll actually make a difference.
The “Circle of Control” helps by identifying a problem you are worried about and then writing down the things you can and cannot control about it. Making this distinction allows you to honor your limitations and channel your efforts where they will make a difference.
The Three Circles
1 - Circle of Concern – Things you are worried or concerned about, but ‘cannot control or influence’.
— Examples: Other people’s actions, external events, systemic issues
2 - Circle of Influence – Things you are concerned about, but ‘can influence’ through your actions, words, or decisions.
— Examples: Communication style, setting boundaries, advocating for change
3 - Circle of Control – The innermost circle containing what you ‘have direct control over right now’.
— Examples: Your thoughts, emotions, reactions, time management, self-care
Resource: Therapistaid and NASW
Helpful Resources:
• SAMHSA.gov – Stress Management Tools
• NIMH.nih.gov – Coping with Seasonal Affective Disorder
• Mental health apps: Headspace, Insight Timer
