Dr. David Schwartz: Orchard Counseling

06/24/2025

When someone you love is going through a difficult time...
You don’t have to be their therapist.
You don’t have to have the perfect response.
You just have to stay regulated, be real, and let them lead.
Follow for more guidance on relationships, intimacy and dating

06/16/2025

Many people believe that s*xual chemistry should be spontaneous and wordless—but real intimacy thrives on communication. Talking about s*x can feel awkward, even scary, especially if you've learned that your needs or boundaries aren’t welcome. But honest, kind conversations about s*x can actually deepen desire and connection. They build safety, clarity, and trust—essential ingredients for pleasure. In s*x therapy, you’ll find a space to explore how to talk about your desires, limits, and experiences. With practice, those conversations can become less loaded and more empowering—for you and your relationships.

06/13/2025

It’s easy to misread our s*xual feelings—or the absence of them—as signs that something is wrong. But desire is complex, shaped by biology, relationships, history, and context. You might feel desire but not want to act on it. You might not feel desire at all and still be perfectly whole. There's no "right" way to experience s*xuality, and it doesn't have to look like anyone else's. S*x therapy provides a nonjudgmental space to sort through these questions with curiosity instead of shame. With the right support, you can better understand yourself and build a more satisfying, authentic relationship with your s*xuality.

If you'd like a compassionate space to untangle confusion and reconnect with yourself, call me today.

06/10/2025

Feelings of shame are always a threat. The message is, "If people see who you really are, they'll abandon you." As a result, we avoid, deflect, shut down, deny, and get defensive. We temporarily escape judgment, but we don't deal with whatever problem is making us feel bad in the first place. So we stay stuck, and we keep hurting.
When we learn to quiet that critical voice and approach ourselves with curiosity, we can see how our mistakes and mis-steps made sense in context, and we can be compassionate with ourselves and our choices, even when they don't look so good in retrospect. When new information is no longer *automatically* a criticism, it's also no longer a threat of abandonment. Then, finally, we can be open to learning new ways to engage with the world and each other. Then, finally, we can embrace ourselves, we can embrace change, and we grow.
If this sounds like a challenge you've been struggling with, call me. I can help.
www.orchardcounseling.com/therapy

06/05/2025

05/21/2025

We're not helpless. But we're also not as much in control as we like to think. We can't make the world unfold the way we want it to, but with patience, attention, and the ability to listen to our hearts and guts, we can learn to where to lean in and where to lean out. We learn when to push, and when to let it be. We learn to read the water, to keep our balance, to do what we can, with what we have, where we are, and to let the rest go. We learn to surf the waves that the world sends us.

05/17/2025

Dr. Renye is amazing. My friends in CA and CO particularly, should get to know her.

05/17/2025

May 17th is International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, and Transphobia, commemorating the 1990 decision of the World Health Organization to remove homos*xuality from the list of mental disorders.

We are grateful to share with you these words of love and affirmation from UUA LGBTQ and Multicultural Programs Director Rev. Michael J. Crumpler:

"On International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, and Transphobia, Unitarian Universalists are unwavering in our solidarity with q***r and trans people everywhere. We affirm that every individual, regardless of their s*xual orientation or gender identity, is deserving of acceptance, love, dignity, and compassion.

We celebrate the diversity that enriches our congregations and communities and are committed to creating a world where all people can live authentically, free from discrimination and fear.

As a faith, we embrace the values of inclusivity and compassion, working tirelessly to dismantle Christian nationalism and religious supremacy to build a more just and loving world for all.

On this we must speak out and do the deep work of eliminating hate in our congregations and communities by supporting our q***r and trans neighbors with love and care."

To learn more about supporting q***r and trans communities in crisis, visit https://www.uua.org/lgbtq/resources.

Interested in ministry for and to LGBTQ+ peoples? Subscribe to UPLIFT, the UUA's newsletter focused on uplifting the LGBTQ+ experience in UUism and beyond at https://www.uua.org/lgbtq/newsletter.

Image description: The UUA chalice in blue, pink, and white trans pride colors with a rainbow border and a black background, May 17th is International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, and Transphobia.

05/13/2025

It feels like magic. Some of it is chemistry. A whole lot of it is practice. Even when our families teach us to love, many don't teach us how to love well. Learning how to know your feelings, to share them with others, and to hear others' feelings is the core of intimacy. These are skills that can be taught and learned. Deeper intimacy is waiting for you. Call today.

05/08/2025

Listening is more important, and way harder, than most of us imagine. It's important because it's often the best way to make our partners (and others) feel safe and valued. It's hard because it requires a lot of self confidence to accept when someone sees the world differently than we do, without feeling like *we're* the ones getting it wrong.

04/28/2025

Being at war with ourselves is exhausting. Learn how to be on your own team.