Clean Slate Coaching

22/02/2024

https://thisnakedmindapp.com/posts/50890662?utm_source=manual

Founded by Annie Grace, our mission is to create a global community where anyone can question their drinking and change their relationship with alcohol - without rules, shame or judgment. By downloading the This Naked Mind Companion App, you acknowledge that you have read, understood, and agree to T...

20/12/2023

A clip from my podcast interview with Annie Grace. I am a Certified Coach working with Christian Women to break free from or who want to take a break from alcohol! What an empowering way to start 2024! Join our AFS program- starts Jan 7! Comment yes for more information.

20/02/2023

Look What's coming soon!! We are so excited.

20/02/2023

https://youtu.be/dxBXmi3SCuk
I was honored to be interviewed on the Annie Grace This Naked Mind Podcast. What a privilege to share my story to help bring healing hope to those needing to hear it. My word this year is "Confidence," Joshua 1:9"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go".

Alcohol was such a small part of Suzzane’s personal life for so long. Throughout her teens, 20’s and even her 30s Suzzane had so many other priorities and ch...

20/02/2023

Let your light shine so brightly that others can see their way out of the darkness. ⭐️
You may have heard that once alcohol is removed, what used to feel heavy and dark is a beautiful, brilliant technicolor bright. Always remember that stars shine the brightest in the darkness during your darkest times. Your most significant victory will come after you keep taking that next tiny step in this tough challenge. Love drives resilience and casts out fear. When I first became alcohol-free, I wasn't feeling so"lovely" for myself or many other things; alcohol was darkening my sky. I kept the love for my "why," and that was stronger than my fear. I wrote my "why" on a sticky note as a reminder. You can and will overcome, and you can learn to be with your fear of doing so. Your vision and purpose are more significant than your challenges. Side steps or data points are temporary, and I learned so much about my character and the strength and resilience hidden behind the mask of alcohol. So, keep believing, I believe in you, and keep having hope; you are closer than you think, and you will become all you are meant to be in the process, and please know I am cheering for you. You, too, are a star shining brightly ⭐️ 🌟 ~Suzanne.

07/02/2023

When drinking, I was looking at the world through different glasses. I thought of myself as “the glass half full, just grateful to have a glass” positive person, though alcohol darkened how I saw the world and myself. I would sometime put on glasses of judgment, condemnation, and isolation. Alcohol was not aligned with my God-given values. I found my beliefs are the lenses through which I saw the world. What we believe determines our focus and, in turn, our actions. You see things as you believe they are—not so much as things really are, but rather as you are. Have hope that on this journey to become alcohol-free, you will put on the glasses of TRUTH instead of judgment, GRACE instead of condemnation, and STRENGTH & CONFIDENCE instead of isolation. I believe you have great and precious worth to the world. I am sending hope and encouragement for today. ~Suzanne 🫶🌵🌞

03/02/2023

This used to be our date night. Can you relate?

This is the area that I have grown the most in my alcohol-free journey. Now that I have taken the “gray area drinking glasses” off, I have fallen even deeper in love with my husband and my whole self. Humans are made to be connected. Our brains, bodies, and hearts are not designed to live in isolation; we need others for our survival. But sadly, plenty of people struggle with having and maintaining healthy relationships, especially when alcohol plays a role.
It takes two to tango, but many folks seem to lack awareness about their role in pushing people—even loved ones—away from them—the push/pull or tug of war. We want to be on the same side and team, and it's not a tug or a fight with the rope.
It is essential to understand that we all are 50% of the relationship, but we are 100% responsible for ourselves. I found that when I was drinking, I had...
The fear of, “I’m afraid you’re not going to love me if I stopped drinking, and that’s what we have that connects us.” “Will I become the boring one? It’s infused into our relationship”. Because we use alcohol as a coping mechanism, a way to suppress negative emotions, and a tool to connect with the people around us, there is a learning curve to making marriage work after quitting drinking.

Even if you have a solid and happy relationship, feeling defensive, resentful, misunderstood, unappreciated, isolated, secretive, or lonely is expected when you’re struggling to moderate your drinking after you take a break. At the same time, you're likely feeling much better physically, emotionally, and mentally without alcohol, its normal to go through a phase where you wonder if you and your spouse know how to communicate or have anything in common.
• Your partner might be your drinking buddy, so you must learn new ways to connect without alcohol.
• Or you might have drifted apart while drinking, so you need to reignite your relationship.
• You might have been drinking to avoid or tolerate things in your marriage that you’re not happy with, and now they’re front and center without a buffer.
• Or you may have let irritations, resentments, and frustrations grow over the years without resolution.
• Your partner might not understand why you are taking a break from alcohol or how to support you.
• And they likely don’t realize you need to reduce overwhelm and have them take on more household chores and parenting responsibilities while you readjust to the new normal.
• Your partner might worry that you’ll outgrow them or like them less if you stop drinking or feel insecure or jealous of the connections you’re making on this alcohol-free path.
These are some of the tools I used.
Communication is vital to make sure both spouses feel respected and supported. It’s important to validate each other’s feelings and experiences and to create a safe environment for both partners to be open and honest about their thoughts and emotions. I found my voice when I stopped drinking and discovered new and healthier ways of communicating and interacting with my partner, strengthening our relationship as it adjusted to the new normal.
It’s also helpful to create boundaries that both spouses feel comfortable with, such as not drinking around each other or in the same room. Additionally, it’s essential to spend quality time together doing sober activities that both partners enjoy, such as going for walks, playing games with kids or grandkids, or watching movies.
Also, it’s essential to remember that you are both in this together and that it’s important always to be patient and understanding with one another. Open communication, respect, and support make it possible to remain happily married while supporting each other in different paths.
The approach to having a happy marriage involves understanding, love, and patience when one partner is alcohol-free, and the other still drinks. Both partners should try to understand each other’s perspectives and needs and strive to practice unconditional love and respect. I always kept in mind that it’s fair to ask a request but to stay away from demanding and placing blame or shame.
The partner who is abstaining from alcohol should focus on self-care and should make sure to express their feelings and opinions without judgment. The partner still drinking should be mindful of their partner’s feelings and not pressure them to drink or make them uncomfortable. Both partners should practice communication and listening skills to ensure their marriage is based on mutual understanding, respect, and trust. Additionally, it can be helpful to practice forgiveness and not allow resentment to fester, especially if there is a need to seek professional help.
All my Love,
~Suzanne 🫶

01/02/2023

Today is a new day; if no one has told you yet, today you are seen, heard, and loved. I am so grateful we are on this journey together. Here now, breathe, now take the next step. You've got this. I am cheering for you. 🫶🌵🌞

24/01/2023

The more you count your blessings, the less you’ll be stressing. When we wake up in the morning, we have a choice. We can feel blessed or stressed. The research shows you cannot be stressed and thankful simultaneously. Are you feeling blessed? You will not be stressed. A valuable tool I have used over the past several years to become alcohol-free and rewire my neuropathways and become a more positive person is they take a walk of gratitude. I call it a thank you walk, and while walking, I say what I'm thankful for. I first started with the “Tiny Habits” research of the Maui habit of saying when my feet hit the floor, “it’s going to be a great day.” Even on the most challenging days, I can find something to be grateful for. I also cemented this habit in place by simply writing in my journal. And the research shows when I do that, I'm finding my brain and body with these positive emotions that uplift me, rather than the stress hormones that slowly drain and empty me. And when you do that, you create a fertile mind ready for success. Are you ready for great things to happen? I am grateful for being on this journey with you. I am sending you all a day filled with hope and blessings.

15/01/2023

What's here now? It's a question of presence. A question that I avoided and was frightened to be alone with when I was drinking. It's a present question of how to be in this moment. You see, when I first started asking this question, what I realized was that I was either rehashing the past or I was rehearsing the future. Rehashing is just trying to change something that has already happened, and rehearsing is trying to control something that hasn't—yet happened. And rehashing and rehearsing when I started asking this question was this is how I spent most of my life. And the reality is that the past is a great place to learn from, but it is a terrible place to live. And the future is a great place to hope for, but it is impossible to live in. The present is the only place where I have strength and peace of mind—sending you the gift of peace in your present and hope for your future. oxox

10/01/2023

I traded the eating disorder for wine at 40; I thought alcohol would wash away all my loneliness, shame, and regret. My red wine became my new scarlet letter.
I remember when it all shifted from an occasional take it or leave it with alcohol to consuming my thoughts and putting Band-Aids on my bullet wounds of loneliness or emptiness. I attended church on Sunday morning and would sing worship songs with the guilt of having too many glasses of wine on a Saturday night. Going to church was mixed with a sense of comfort and guilt. I entered with my suitcase of sins and disappointments in myself. Now that I am alcohol-free, I have found more peace in facing my shame and letting healing light shine into my authentic brokenness than I ever did in my false or pretend wholeness. I wish the same for YOU!

05/01/2023

Drinking fueled my need for certainty. Possibly because I lost trust in myself. Now that I have let go of alcohol, I have gained the trust and can take the next step on the stairs. I still hold onto the trusted rail in my life (Faith). You can take one small step today.
Tony Robbins discusses our first human need, “the need for Certainty.” We need to feel in control and know what's coming next so we can feel secure. It's the need for basic comfort, the need to avoid pain and stress, and to create pleasure. Our need for certainty is a survival mechanism. It affects how much risk we're willing to take in life—in our jobs, in our investments, and in our relationships. The higher the need for certainty, the less risk you'll be willing to take or emotionally bear. We must ensure that we take the first step in the right direction. It is entirely okay if we can’t picture the entire staircase in front of us. Life is interesting because of the unknowns, so enjoy every aspect. Your intention should be correct, and your heart in the right place. With this attitude, you will get the courage to face whatever comes your way. When your intentions are correct, every step you take will have a positive impact. The impact could be small, but as you move on in the right direction, you eventually make a significant impact. Therefore, do not expect certainty. Rather than be prepared for the unexpected and know that you will be ok, hold the rail (meaning; friends, faith, trust). You're headed in the right direction.