07/13/2023
Be mindful of ‘should’ statements that keep you stuck feeling either bad about yourself or angry/resentful towards others.
A cognitive distortion that we commonly experience is the 'should' statement. It is a thought that creates rigid rules about how you should be doing something.
This cognitive distortion also affects your thoughts about other people - how they ought to be or must do things.
When I first learned about 'should' statements as a cognitive distortion, I was a little confused. We do have obligations and there are things we ought to do to accomplish a specific goal. But …. we can get into trouble when our 'should' thoughts lead us to feel guilty and discouraged. If these statements are targeted toward others, they can lead to resentments that may not be warranted.
To understand whether your 'should' statement is rational or a false sense of obligation, ask yourself "why is this important?". When you can provide a reason that is rational and not underlying fear or guilt, then it is a relevant thought.
Unhelpful 'should' statements can make us inflexible in our decisions and may leave us feeling stuck in our situation.
What are your thoughts on the 'should' statements being a thinking error?
Take care of your mind and body. Love, Nawal ♥️
