07/06/2025
This time of year always comes with a little sting. Some years it creeps up quietly, and some years it comes in with a bang like the fireworks. Even if it’s not in my conscious mind, my heart brain remembers. As a young woman of 24, I wasn’t really allowed to grieve. “You are young, you will find someone else. Weren’t you guys fighting anyway? Didn’t he cheat on you anyway? I don’t know why you're so upset. It’s been 6 months already, why aren’t you over it?” Only a few of my closest friends knew my heartache, even though I still hid it pretty well (most of the time). I didn’t receive much support at home because of their own grief history. At 24, what do we know about loss and death? What were we taught? It’s been 30 years. He wasn’t a saint by any means, but he was like no other (if you know you know). At the time, he was my boyfriend of almost 6 years and my best friend. It changed me. It shaped me. I wanted to show up and lean in when others were grieving, which led me to a successful and rewarding career. There isn’t any conversation about it that’s off the table. It helped me access even more of my spiritual connection, changing my vibration so I could access other dimensions. I can help others with messages from loved ones who died. To other young people experiencing loss, this is my wisdom for you. You will heal, you will grow, but there will always be a connection and maybe even a piece of your heart that dies with them. It’s ok when the memory of them begins to fade. It doesn’t mean your love didn’t exist. It’s ok to love again when you’re ready and on your terms, not society. Find a ritual that helps you honor their life. Go to a grief counselor or hypnotherapist. It saved my life and made me who I am today. Live each day to the fullest you are capable of. And most of all, you are NOT alone. I see you! Ted died in a motorcycle accident on July 6, 1995. So today, I would like to honor his memory and all that he helped me become; I am truly grateful.
