Beloved Coaching

10/14/2025

Just me and my sprinkle covered pink triangle sending some extra love to all the qu**rs.

💖💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

10/10/2025

Sometimes sitting with our grief or discussing desire and pleasure can be too much without something to do with our hands.

Whether it’s a stim or part of the way your brain process information, inviting crafts or artistic practices into session is always welcome.

As provider working with my hands while holding space can be a supportive and magical process as well.

There’s also a metaphor here… slowly stitching our parts back into a whole, or something like that. I’m not going to think too hard about it, I’m just going to let the pleasure of hand sewing brightly colored scraps be enough.

What’s your favorite way to keep your hands busy?

*xEd *xualHealing *xCoach ***rS*xCoach ***rs *xuality *xualEmpowerment

10/01/2025

I’m just sitting in the dark listening to the sounds of water at the lake. The air is cool. And my heart is so heavy.

Today I fell asleep after work because my little system needed to shut all the way down. The news, my own grief, the grief I am holding with others shut me down.

When I woke up my wife asked if I felt like I wanted to walk around the tiny lake. It took me a bit, but I got on pants and out the door.

Everything is still overwhelmingly hard and heartbreaking.

And right now I can also hear the water at the lake, air cool on my face.

What else is here with you in the midst of all the heartbreak and overwhelm?

09/25/2025

OCTOBER DATES ARE SCHEDULED!

This is the season where we more intentionally honor our beloved dead. Let’s grieve and share their stories together.

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Grief is embodied and pleasure is embodied.

You’re invited to a communal practice where we set our intentions on turning toward our individual mourning, welcoming erotic knowing, and holding space for one another's grief.

Using the wisdom of our pleasure we can open up pathways for our grief to shift and move. And witnessing the grief of one another - in intentional space - creates a sacred balm to metabolize the pain of our collective losses.

What to Expect:

We will begin with a welcome and opening of our time together. You are invited to have your camera on or off, whatever is comfortable for you. I will guide folks into a meditation that will touch on grief. We will have time to share (or not) what we noticed about our grief before going into a time of mindful erotic practice.

During the mindful erotic practice, cameras and mics will be off for everyone. There will be a ~40 minute playlist to support the experience. It is a self guided time to tune into what your body needs with regard to metabolizing your grief. The guiding force is pleasure and following your own yes and no. There is no right or wrong way to spend the time. We are simply setting aside time to tend to our grief within the container of community.

Once the mindful erotic practice is over we will come back together with cameras on (or off) and you have the opportunity to share (or not) and witness the reflections of others.

Details:

Open to adults 18+ of all genders.

Location: Zoom Room with captions

Suggested Donation: $5-$25 - No one turned away for lack of funds.

Register in the link in bio. ❤️

*xEd *xualHealing *xCoach *xCoachPDX ***rS*xCoach ***rs

09/24/2025

Very excited to be facilitating this space for Q***r Community Deathcare next month.

Let’s talk all the things s*xual bereavement!

Sign up here: https://www.eventbrite.ca/e/s*xual-bereavement-q***r-death-salon-tickets-1665482315439?aff=ebdsoporgprofile&fbclid=PAVERFWAM_qlNleHRuA2FlbQIxMQABp77Jha3IWMxkRAVpmChmLbLPM_cy2tY5gJp_k7rSGrI6ziVv18MzkK7GrxCd_aem_c3p3Bc0lPXiwlz26LYlu_g

Let’s gather and engage with our questions and feelings about:

s*x after the death of a loved one.
the disenfranchised grief of polyamorous and kinky relational loss.
how pleasure and erotic energy can support our mourning.
changes in desire as death approaches for ourselves or a loved one.
cultural expectations of how a widow should act and our internalized stories about that.
anything s*x/pleasure and bereavement related. No question is too taboo.

Jess will invite folks to participate in embodiment exercises, freewrite and consider the ways they want to be in relationship to their s*xual expression within their (anticipatory) grief.

Jess DeVries is a q***r somatic s*x coach and grief worker. She primarily serves the q***r/trans community supporting folks in reclaiming body autonomy and to inspire curiosity about pleasure and s*xual expression, guiding folks to define and pursue pleasure on their own terms. She is a grief advocate who regularly facilitates spaces for people to grieve, inviting the wisdom of the body to guide the grief process.

Q***r Death Salon is a community space for all 2SLGBTQIA+ people to come together to discuss death, dying and grief. It is a facilitated drop-in discussion space, with the purpose of building connection, skill, and resources for 2SLGBTQIA+ people navigating end of life in our personal lives and in our communities.

Participants are encouraged to bring their own questions, stories, and complexities to share.

Automatic closed captioning is enabled for the zoom session. Follow the link in bio for more information about Jess, on format and accessibility, and to get the zoom link.

09/23/2025

Join me on Thursday!!
When we think about the hot s*xual experiences that we’ve had, or want to have, we tend to focus on the action, who was there with us; maybe what we were wearing or where we were.

All of those things are important.

AND

What is also important is how we felt emotionally.

We can often forget how much our brain and emotional body are integral to our s*xual experiences and honoring how much they enhance our erotic lives.

The reason I love teaching workshops is because most of us didn’t grow up with good s*x ed. Now, as adults, we get to learn new things about our bodies, our minds, and our desires that we weren’t able to (or allowed to) learn earlier in our lives. We get to choose to fill up our erotic toolbox with whatever knowledge and experiences we would like to have. Or spark our curiosity. Or kindle our arousal.

If you would like to add a deeper understanding of aspects of your desire to your toolbox, attending this week’s Core Erotic Theme workshop might just be for you!

We will dive into the 4 Cornerstones and take time to look for clues as to what emotions and experiences are important to your erotic makeup.

You can find details in the link in my bio and sign up there.

Feel free to DM with questions.

I look forward to seeing you there!

Our time will include a somatic exercise and a guided erotic meditation as a part of the workshop.

$25 or $15 per person.

Thursday, September 25th
6:00pm - 7:30pm PST

*xEd *xualHealing *xCoach ***rS*xCoach ***rs *xuality *xualEmpowerment

09/16/2025

My friend Mel wrote a beautiful book. Today is their publish date and I am so proud of them and this gift they have given us all.

Radical Relating is for everyone. To bring awareness and choice into the way that we relate with one another regardless of what types of relationships we engage in. Get a copy for yourself, your friends, your parents. Ask your library to add copies to their shelves.

I know this book is going to change the world.

Mel is going on a wee book tour this month, so BC kids can see them in person and get a signed copy. And it delights me to no end that my copy is the first one Mel signed. Insert jokes about popping cherries and how virginity is also a myth.

Congrats dear friend!! Your book baby is a dream!

*xEd *xualHealing *xCoach ***rS*xCoach ***rs *xuality *xualEmpowerment

09/16/2025

Hey. Hi.

I’m glad you’re here. 💖

09/16/2025

When we regularly spend time with our grief it becomes easier to bear even when it’s unbearable.

Our bodies know what they need and the space and permission to show up in that way.

Mindful Erotic Grief is a space where your grief gets to be exactly how it is. Loud, angry, numb, full of stories, quiet, deep wells of sadness, disbelieving, uncertain.

And body and heart get to show up, however they want to.

There is no wrong way to grieve.

Let’s do it together.

*xEd *xualHealing *xCoach *xCoachPDX ***rS*xCoach ***rs

09/15/2025

Yesterday I got to stop in to and see my friend Néna who I haven’t seen in nearly a decade. Two Portland qu**rs who fell in love with Canadians and now I get to hang out in her bookstore in Vancouver.

This bookstore is a q***r ass space full of so much love and magic. It’s exactly the place to spend your money to support local business and q***r authors.

While I was there I bought of copy of another dear one’s book. birthed a beautiful book into the world and y’all should get a copy.

09/10/2025

Have questions about Pleasure (your) Chest??

We will be answering them on IG live this Friday - September 12th at 4pm PST.

If you can’t make it live, you can watch later or send us a question in the comments. You can also DM me or with your questions and we will answer them directly!

If you’re ready to sign up — head to the link in the B - I - O

*xEd *xualHealing *xCoach *xCoachPDX ***rS*xCoach ***rs