RecollectedSelf

09/14/2023

Reprogramming the mind me unlearning old patterns and replacing them with healthy new skills then repeat , repeat, repeat!

09/08/2023

🔥

09/08/2023

What we consume matters❤️‍🩹❤️

09/05/2023

Happy Season 3 of your podcast Dr. Nieca Goldberg!

Welcome to Season 3 of the podcast.
❤️
If you’re a new listener—Welcome! If you’ve been with me since Season 1 thank you for your continued support! Season 3 is going to be special.

The first guest of our third season is Jamie Mahler, is a licensed therapist and trauma specialist. Jaime helps people recover from bad relationships by taking control, reclaiming their power and moving ahead.
In her new book: “Toxic Relationship Recovery: Your Guide to Identifying Toxic Partners, Leaving Unhealthy Dynamics, and Healing Emotional Wounds After Breakup,” Jaime offers step-by-step tips for spotting those red flags, peeling back the layers of trauma, and dating again with a healthy mindset.

What was the biggest “Aha!” moment you had while listening to the episode? Let me know in the comments below.

09/05/2023

My book launched nationwide today! If you want a signed copy go to the Barnes & Noble at University of Rochester!! I signed two❤️‍🩹❤️

09/03/2023

It’s healing a thousand wounds.

There is a lot to unpack here:

Secondary trauma may not seem that big to someone, until you think of their baseline. If someone has experienced abuse, assault (any type of trauma) their body is not at a centered place. They are highly activated because of what was done to them (NOT because they are not handling it well).

In an attempt to ease the dysregulation, they reach out for help. The hope when you reach out in this state is:

-By telling someone, they will find some sort of relief.
-By getting help, the pain of what has happened will lessen.
-By being heard, they can help me address this wound and heal from it.

This is all true. Those ARE the impacts when someone is heard. Those ARE the results when someone is in safe keeping after they have gone through experiences that threaten their well-being.

Now, what about when they are not met with compasison and undertsanding? The original wound is now masked behind further threat because they are trying to navigate how to say it better so they are understood. Or they say it to more people, with the hopes they find relief. Or, to defend, defend, defend, because they are in an environment that isn’t concerned with how much they are hurting.

It’s not just about the reaction. It’s about the state of their vulnerability when they reached out for help.

Getting wounded by reaching out for help is it’s own hell.

To those with these experiences:

This was never about you. We live in a world where people crave power, and the way power works is to hide what happens behind the scenes that would require transparency, vulnerability…truth. In my experience, there are more people who would rather bow to denial and secrets than know how much other people are hurting.

You were brave to reach out for help.
You were not too much.
It was not your fault, and you deserve to be heard.
�Let today be a shift where you name additional pain that came from you needing (and asking for) help as brave and vulnerable. Regardless of how poorly you were met, you were brave and vulnerable and I hope you own that and it helps you heal.

*****If you would like to work with me, click the linktr.ee/natepost and grab a spot in my online community (registration opens Friday, Sept 1).

*****While you are there, grab the two free ebooks on inner child work and trauma recovery.

If you relate to this post, can you simply type out “Me” so other people know how common this experience is. That validation matters.

I’m so glad you are here! 🫶🫶✨✨

09/03/2023

So simple yet such a beautiful representation of what healing looks like.

📸 CR: twigseeds

08/31/2023

Yes.

Healthy Relationships are typically sought out and they constantly evolve as the relationship grows. Toxic Relationships will feel like a dysfunctional prison.

❤

08/30/2023

There is something profound in the sense of hope after you’ve hit rock
bottom.

When you are so stunned by the way you are acting that you truly don’t recognize yourself anymore.

Maybe rock bottom isn’t when you meet the shame needed to wake up, maybe rock bottom is where you meet yourself.

The self that knows you deserve a life that is more than scraping yourself off the floor. You deserve friends, parents and partners that treat you well… but most importantly- you deserve to treat yourself well.

-follow RecollectedSelf for more
on trauma recovery

08/29/2023

Hold yourself accountable for your behavior.

08/26/2023

👏🏻 yes

🙌🙌🙌

08/22/2023

They not only identify WITH toxic systems they identify AS the toxic system and once that happens -to dismantle a toxic system will mean you will see people sacrificing their own lives for a system that abuses them.

The indoctrinated do not know they are indoctrinated.

08/22/2023

We weren’t ungrateful children. We didn’t know the complexities that came with being an adult so we didn’t know what you were talking about when you said “you are so ungrateful.” We didn’t understand finances. We didn’t understand budgeting. We didn’t understand bills and mortgages.

The point is, we were children. Children don’t have the context about certain things until they grown up. Spending our entire childhood telling us “we don’t get it” didn’t help us “get it” faster. It just created shame around asking for what we needed. We learned to feel bad for advocating for ourselves.

When adults stop treating children like they are small adults with an adult consciousness -walking around “knowing better”, children will be able to feel a lot less guilty for merely EXISTING in a world they don’t fully understand yet.

Shaming children for not knowing something they aren’t developmentally ABLE to grasp yet, is cruel.

(REMINDER: I am talking about CHILDREN, not your 26 year old adult child that DOES understand these things)

08/21/2023

Be kind to EVERY version of you. Yes, you can hold yourself accountable WHILE still having self compassion.

❤️

08/21/2023

❤️‍🩹❤️

08/09/2023

Sound off in the comments :

Things I needed to hear when I was a child but didn’t :

08/09/2023

Attention all audio processors! My audiobook is almost here! (More photos of the process in the comments!)

My new book TOXIC RELATIONSHIP RECOVERY will also be available as an audiobook, read by yours truly via Simon & Schuster Audio
Pre-order your copy today for delivery on September 5th:

https://bit.ly/43Ka8kE

08/09/2023

Attention all audio- processors!!!!! The AudioBook Pre-Order Link is hereeeeeeee for Toxic Relationship Recovery and it’s my voice 🔥! So grateful I was able to read my own book via .audio . Pre-order your copy today for delivery on September 5th.

08/08/2023

This is what emotional literacy looks like and sometimes it takes longer to get there but when you do… it can be so healing for relationships.

08/07/2023

We didn’t want to do this. We had to.

08/04/2023

Harvard Photo Dump. Today was unforgettable. Starting the morning with sitting with the and then learning from the owner of the , and their campaign, Phil Schermer, CEO of , James Holt from the Archewell Foundation and then sharing about men’s mental health and smashing celebrity stereotypes. Then meeting all the creators who were more than I could have ever imagined them to be. The summit felt safe and abundant and joyful 🥹. It was a beautiful day and I am so honored to have been selected to be a part of it ! The Harvard Mental Health Creator Summit 2023💜 Thanks for the memories. S/o to who we got hear yesterday because they were playing at !

07/29/2023

The past version of me is floored…

07/29/2023

💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻💅🏻

🤣🤣🤣

07/26/2023

🖤🖤

07/19/2023

This is called weaponizing relationships and it’s a huge red flag. Watch out for folks that throw your vulnerabilities in your face to hurt you in a conflict.

07/06/2023

Let the dead bury the dead.

Get the book: Toxic Relationshio Recovery ➡️ https://amzn.to/3rdrokl

06/25/2023

My book is climbing !!! 🎉 Get Yours Here: https://amzn.to/3CMmIV6

06/17/2023

Wow.

Ready to start tackling how to recover from the complex trauma this dude outlined in the article?!

Let’s go -
Page:
Podcast:

06/13/2023

Need a supplement to your self work?
Here is over 60 hours of free content :

Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/show/0R6a67IePpznPsFO4fSLJN?si=ezZYx1GLRP6eFWwdWFxsYQ

Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/unlearned/id1620980656

06/13/2023

Shaming mental health experiences keeps people sick and imprisoned under the shackles of stigma. Releasing shame means releasing the hold others have over you.

Page:
Podcast:

05/30/2023

Think of EVERY SYSTEM we are a part of. Whew.

Exactly!
(Thank you Barbara)
Join Women's Rights News if you haven't already

05/26/2023

I’ve noticed this. The more you show up in your own power, your own place of healing - people get angry. Be mindful of that. Don’t ever force someone else to heal but just by your mere presence, many see you as a threat.

Don't ever dim your Light because of that. They can either get inspired or stay triggered. You just keep doing you. ~ Gloria* Allure x Alchemy
// 📷picturesource SignsFromSource //

05/19/2023

I've just hit 400K followers! Thank you for continuing support. Im grateful for each one of you. 🤗🎉

05/19/2023

Thank you - all of you for your support!

05/18/2023

Follow for more like this:

05/14/2023

To all my cycle breakers today…
We can do this.

05/14/2023

To my cycles breakers… we can do this. ❤️‍🩹❤️

05/05/2023

Green Flag Alert❇️

Follow for more content

Listen to for deep dives into this work

05/03/2023

Follow for more trauma recovery content❤️‍🩹❤️

05/01/2023

Read twice.