03/12/2026
Anger - quite often we find that when we quit substance or behavioural addictions, we're not the calm, guru- like, mindful person that we imagined. Many of us discover we are easily angered.
This might be manageable though it can be a highway to relapse.
Anger often shows up as a highly visible emotion, yet what we see on the surface is rarely the full story.
In psychology and therapy/counselling, anger is often described as a secondary emotion as it frequently masks other feelings (emotional pain) such as fear, sadness, hurt, or shame.
'The Anger Iceberg '( saved to our photo album ' Anger' in our photos/media folders) is one useful tool to explore what lies beneath the surface.
Equally important is understanding what triggers anger in the first place.
This helpful infographic by shows us that triggers can be understood on different levels:
🔹 Immediate triggers: hunger, stress, poor communication, or fatigue.
🔹 Emotional & interpersonal triggers: feeling disrespected, excluded, or unappreciated.
🔹 Psychological & cognitive triggers: fear of losing control, negative self-talk, or a sense of powerlessness.
🔹 Root-level & learned causes: unresolved trauma, early learned behaviours, or unmet emotional needs.
Recognising our own triggers is one of the the steps to managing our anger in a healthier way.
By becoming curious about what sits underneath the reaction, we can begin to respond with more awareness and less reactivity.
Image credit : infographic by
