Lori J Warner, PhD PLLC

08/05/2020

Even in the midst of a pandemic, we can beat ourselves up, obsessing over perceived flaws. Maybe it's because there is so much we can't control, so we turn to things we believe we can (and "should") control.

But there is a difference between "healthy striving" to do things that make our bodies and minds perform and feel their best, and harsh perfectionism or believing we have to look a particular way to be worthy of love and respect. I am thankful for the growing movement of body neutrality, body positivity, and appreciation of diverse body types and abilities.

However, diet culture/beauty culture is still a real problem. I can't even quantify the amount of mental strain and anguish this causes. How much headspace is taken up with monitoring and judging ourselves over arbitrary and often conflicting "rules"?

This can become so life-sucking and far from the real point of life. For example, think of someone you really admire, someone you think is truly amazing. Let's pretend you picked Mother Teresa. Do you admire and honor her because of how she looked, her fashion, her skill at accessorizing?

I'm guessing you would have picked her because of her inspirational love for all humanity and tireless efforts to make the world a better place. Or something along those lines.

In the spirit of this exercise, I've once again asked our resident artist to help us illustrate how bizarre it would be if we applied all these rigid, critical, and unhelpful "rules" to everyone we met. Let's give ourselves and everyone else a little more grace and compassion as we all travel this journey together!

Credit: PoniPoki Art (etsy.com/shop/ponipokiart/)

07/10/2020

A lot of the time, we think we "can't stand" feeling a certain way, and we think it will last forever if we don't do something about it. The trouble is, the more we tell ourselves we can't handle something, the harder it is to handle!

I've commissioned a new artist to help me illustrate some core ACT concepts, and this one reminds us that our feelings are messages, and don't need to be "fixed". As we learn to drop (or at least lessen) the struggle and approach our challenges with our values in front of us, we have more energy to do what matters. We can allow our feelings to come and go (whether or not we like them) naturally.

04/30/2020

From the World Health Organization, a guide to dealing with stress - Doing What Matters in Times of Stress. So excited that Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is being promoted globally. This e-book has lots of helpful links as well.

04/15/2020

This was powerful and I needed some kleenex! It's ok if you're still feeling grief and pain and it's hard to see the light right now. Save this for a moment when you can spare four minutes and fifteen seconds to watch. It might help!

Born from a feeling of isolation and a fierce desire to find purpose in the face of helplessness, is the collective effort of over 250 filmm...

04/08/2020

This quote is literally staring me in the face all day at work. It's on the calendar on the wall in front of my desk. So, I'm trying to take it to heart and figure out how I can grow and also help others to grow, or rest, or heal, or grieve, just as they need to. Be kind to yourselves and to each other.