01/27/2026
đ§ď¸RAIN: Easy Mindfulness for Overwhelming Grief
Grief comes in many forms. It can come along with loss of life, loss of relationships, loss of faith, loss of trust, loss of security, loss of a sense of identity.
Many of us in Minnesota are dealing with unexpected feelings of grief right now. And grief has a knack of making us feel disoriented and emotionally overwhelmed.
Since we know a thing or two about grief, here is a tool we use in Grief Compass to help families influence the way they experience grief and emotional overwhelm.
The R.A.I.N. method of mindfulness helps you examine and better understanding what youâre feeling rather than just having that feeling take over with no way to process it.
RAIN practice was originally identified by Michele McDonald and has four steps:
âđźRecognize whatâs happening
đ˘Allow whatâs happening to happen, just as it is
đľđźInvestigate whatâs happening with equanimity
âNon-identify with whatâs happening
I know that sounds pretty abstract so letâs take it step by step.
âđźR: Recognize whatâs happening
This involves being very conscious of exactly whatâs happening around you and how youâre reacting to it. Rather than existing entirely inside the emotion, you look at the way youâre feeling right now. Simply identifying and naming your emotions can reduce their power.
đĽA: Allow whatâs happening to happen, just as it is.
Now that you identify and see what youâre experiencing, give yourself permission to experience these emotions and physical reactions without judgment. Permit yourself to let the emotions unfold, as they are. Some people use the word âacceptâ here, as in âI see that Iâm sad and a little scared and I accept it. Itâs okay to feel this way.â
đľđźI: Investigate whatâs happening with equanimity.
First, equanimity means, evenness of mind especially under stress, without judgment. So be gentle with yourself here as you use your senses to detect how this emotion feels in your body. As objectively as possible, and with compassion, examine what brought about the emotions or thoughts youâre experiencing. Do you believe the thought or feeling to be true? Do these thoughts or feelings bring up other thoughts and feelings? What are those? When have you felt this before and why? When you find suffering within yourself offer that suffering compassion, like you would for a friend.
âN: Non-identify with whatâs happening
Who you are is not defined by a momentary thought or emotion. Youâve recognized the emotion, allowed it to unfold, and looked at it as objectively as you are able, now you can reassure yourself that this emotion is something that you experienced, it is not who you are.
You can use RAIN at any time and it can help you move from feeling like a victim of your emotions or thoughts toward making use of those emotions to better understand what kind of care you need from yourself.
At first itâs not entirely easy, when youâre feeling highly emotional, to refocus your thoughts toward RAIN, but with practice it gets easier and can become incredibly comforting. Especially when you know that the result will be liberating yourself from being defined by your emotional reactions.
